Although he'd gathered his resolve, Noth hadn’t realized that it was this difficult to stop being depressed. He’d managed to march over to Elillith and ask her to finally take him out to town by the end of the week while he was riding on the sudden second wind he’d felt after getting mad. He was proud of himself. Noth had even felt accomplished as he went back to his villa, despite not having really done much. But after making it back home, sitting down, eating food, running his fingers along the cracks he’d made in his bracelet after his embarrassing temper tantrum, and taking a small nap, he realized something. Once his adrenaline, anger, determination, and minor sense of having made progress faded away, he was once again left with nothing. Maybe he didn’t feel quite as hopeless, and his head wasn’t nearly as clouded and foggy as it had been, but he could feel the grip of his depression still trying to keep hold.

The signs were frankly annoying to deal with. Noth couldn’t help but want to grind his teeth at how much of a setback these unwanted notions, feelings, and reactions were being.

He felt bored, but at the same time the thought of doing anything at all was unappealing. Noth loved reading, but reading felt tedious all of a sudden. He could take a stroll around the manor, or sit under the tree he liked and bathe in the sunlight, but the thought of having to go back outside again after having already gone out earlier seemed like too much. Even the thought of going into his greenhouse and doing any of the possible activities he could get up to in there seemed repulsive, just because it required effort.

As he stewed over all the activities he was feeling an aversion to, Noth suddenly heard a rustling sound coming from outside his window. It seemed to be coming from downstairs, just outside of his kitchen. The boy hardened, grimacing as he assumed the worst; Another assassin had come only a day after the last, and this one was getting a pre-dinner start. Perhaps this one would try and poison him? Maybe instead of something lethal, this one would drug him so he couldn’t fight back? The fact that his angel was being completely quiet about this might have meant that this new assailant hadn’t yet made it into the house like the others had when she’d notified him. Or maybe it was possible that there was some new tactic that even the all knowing angel couldn’t see coming? As his mind chugged through all the possibilities, Noth grabbed onto the hem of his angel’s robes and led her as he cautiously made his way downstairs.

When the boy finally snuck his way into the kitchen, he started to hear yet another noise that he could only assume was coming from the noisy intruder; Someone was ravenously chewing something. And yet, this sound was still coming from outside of the window? The only thing he could assume was that someone had come inside of his kitchen, stolen food, and then gone back out to eat it. However, the biggest catch to that thought was that Noth didn’t even have any food in his villa, whenever he got hungry he simply wished food into existence, and it had been a while since Elillith had brought him any snacks while she visited. What could they possibly be eating? Did the church send some upstart wannabe assassin this time who’d brought their own lunch or something?

But then Noth remembered.

He’d thrown out the remainder of his breakfast that morning, just like he always did lately.

Immediately the boy’s face warped into a mosaic of disgust and disbelief.

Now he didn’t even want to go looking for whoever was outside. Who’d want to see the image of someone chowing down on their perishable leftovers that had been lying in the bug ridden dirt for half a day? And then there was another part of him that wanted to just shoo whoever it was away, considering that there was absolutely no way that he could go on listening to them eating without picturing it in his head. The latter won out, and Noth took a deep breath before heading outside to confront whoever it was.

The wind left his sails immediately when he saw that the only one there was a cat.

Noth almost felt upset at himself for how his mind went straight to assassins and assassins only. Of course his angel hadn’t notified him about this, the cat probably came here to eat every day. No wonder the food he’d dumped had always been mysteriously missing by the next day. How foolish of him to not even have once wondered where it had gone. The boy sighed and sunk down into a defeated squat, running his fingers through his hair as he watched the cat.

“I…guess I shouldn’t beat myself up about something so silly.”

He cocked a small mocking smile at his own rash actions, and then turned to look at the angel he’d dragged along behind him.

“How long has this cat been here?”

“What, and I never noticed her?”

The boy’s face wrinkled up for a second at her words, but then he let out a weary laugh and leaned his head on his hand.

“Hah, well… I don’t like the way you put it, but I guess I have been pretty busy. At least, that was true until this whole affliction stint. I suppose it’s good that this cat got to get nice and fat off of my pain though.”

He reached out his hand in a friendly motion, hoping to appeal to the feline as he made little noises to attract her. The angel put her hands on her hips and puffed her cheeks out a bit in a cutesy display, leaning down to make sure Noth would hear her.

Noth stopped making noises and tilted his head, then leaned over to get a better view of the cat’s stomach. It was indeed rotund in a way that simple fat couldn’t achieve. Perhaps the angel was right. His mother had always loved animals, and he’d learned to care about their wellbeing because of it. How disappointed would his mother be in him if he didn’t try and help this one out in its time of need? Besides, even if it was unwittingly, he’d already started feeding it; Noth felt responsible for this cat now.

“Oh. Then is… Um… She’s probably really… close then, right? Do we need to do anything? Should I wish her up some blankets or a towel or something?”

His angel looked touched at his concerned words, but then she looked a bit worried a moment later. Then, she finally looked down at him with an embarrassed look and shrugged. The boy pulled an incredulous face at this, and couldn’t help his accusatory tone.

“I thought you were supposed to know everything? What happened to that?”

It was understandable why she crossed her arms and glared at his words, but a moment later she bit her lip and began to drum her fingers on her arm. Eventually she responded with a sigh and an awkward if not a little annoyed look.

Her mien grew just the slightest touch pained for a moment when she started talking again, but as soon as Noth registered that fact, she turned around and began to slowly float towards the manor.

Noth sat there in confusion for a few moments as he stared after her and tried to figure out what was wrong. For a second there, it seemed like his angel was upset that they had to go see Elillith. But didn’t she like her? He remembered getting jealous because the angel had seemed interested in a different person for the first time, and he remembered her saying that his reward for getting to know the kitchen maid better was gaining his first friend. It was a much more practical and self attained reward than he’d been expecting to receive, but in the end he didn’t have any complaints about what he’d acquired. However, ever since he and Elillith had become friends, the angel suddenly seemed to go cold towards the woman. In fact, it rather seemed like she disliked it whenever Elillith came near. But why? What changed?

His angel’s mind and jealousy were a complete enigma to Noth.

~~~

“Yer makin’ too big of a fuss about it.”

Elillith seemed, as ever, unfazed about the situation. Instead of seeming concerned about the cat, she seemed to be busy checking Noth over, and seeing if he truly was ok now like he'd said. She gave his pallid and slightly too thin cheeks a few light touches and slaps, and pressed her forehead against his own to check his temperature. Noth could hear the sound of grinding teeth coming from his side, but he did his best to ignore it as he silently prayed that his angel wouldn’t do anything bad. It was impossible to keep the awkward look off of his face, though; This was all far too much up close attention for him.

“Look, I’m really ok now, so you don’t have to do all this. I won’t worry you anymore, I promise. So can you please help me out with this little thing, even if I am ‘making too much of a fuss’?”

The kitchen maid’s eyes looked utterly unconvinced, but after staring Noth in the face for a short while, she let out the smallest sigh, and then quickly marched back into the kitchens. The boy was worried for a minute that he’d done the woman wrong in some way, and debated on going after her, but the fact that she went into the cramped, hot kitchens kept him hesitating for a few minutes. Soon enough, though, Elillith returned with a small pie packed to the brim with meat and veggies, and shoved it into Noth’s hands.

“Y’Eat, I talk.”

Noth tried his best not to frown. The idea of eating still wasn’t terribly appealing, but he knew she was only forcing this pie on him because she was worried. He knew how much skinnier he’d gotten over the past few weeks, and it’s not like he wouldn’t feel the same way if the tables were reversed. It took a lot of willpower and a few large breaths in and out, but after a few moments the boy started mechanically eating the pie. After the first few mouthfuls he really wanted to stop like usual, but instead he gripped the fork tighter and dug in for more, stopping every so often to take a few more deep breaths and regather his determination. Every time he stopped like that, his angel would lovingly stroke his back to encourage him, and she’d hum happily whenever he started back up again. Elillith watched his every move closely, displeased that it seemed so hard for him to eat, but still relieved that he was at least eating as much as he was.

“How’re y’plannin’ t’ take care o' a cat when y’can’t even take care o' yerself?”

Noth lifted his head and looked the woman square in her face, making sure to chew as exaggeratedly as possible to show her that he was keeping his end of the bargain. The maid scoffed and rolled her eyes like she was unimpressed, but after a moment she showed a rarity to Noth; She let the tiniest of smiles grace her face. The boy could count the times he’d caught her smiling like this over their past few years together on one hand.

“Ah, fine. I use' t’ know a stray fr’m th’ slums. Me n’ m’siblings would look after it like we owned it.”

Her words made Noth perk up immediately in hope, and he quickly opened his mouth to ask her questions, but she just as quickly put a hand up to stop him before pointing back to the almost finished pie in his hands, and straightened her face back into its usual unaffected look.

“Lemme fin’sh. None o’that means I know ‘bout pregnant cats. Th’ one we had w’s male.”

Disappointment was immediately written all over Noth’s face. He solemnly ate the last bite of his pie and put the tin it had come in down to rest on his knee, but when Elillith reached down and stole it away he looked up at her. He’d never seen the mischievous gaze she was giving him before. She let out a low, unnatural sounding giggle with her uncaring and sluggish sounding voice.

“Like I said, yer makin’ this all too big a probl’m. All we have t’ do ‘s go t’ th’ pet shop. Wern’ we go’n out n'ways?”

For the n’th time today, Noth felt stupid for not seeing the obvious answer right in front of him. He cursed how slow he’d been lately. Was it because he’d been sleeping too much? Maybe it was just caused by his mentality lately? Or maybe because he hadn’t really been eating, like Elillith was worried about? He stared at the empty tin in the kitchen maid’s hands for a few moments. He couldn’t just let himself stay like this, not with how dangerous of a turn his life seemed to be taking. If the answer to this problem could possibly be as simple as eating more, then…

“Elillith,”

Noth commanded in his most determined tone.

“Bring me more pie.”