I'm not sure what to make of my feelings, perhaps the most complex thing is my heart. it wants to burn brightly, fanning the flames, yet at the same time it's afraid to fail. Ashes to ashes, and also dust to dust, that is how love has and will always be. Never without risk, not without worry, and I worry if this is really love.

Perhaps this is a funny amusement, or perhaps an after thought like the past, perhaps I'll never really know in true, or perhaps I'll never really need to? It's all so confusing, me and then you. I can not tell what perplexes me more? I'm so jumbled, my worries and my woes, you're so calm and yet it's not so simple... It never is, is it? That'd be easy... and we know that love is never easy, far from in fact, perhaps that's what draws me.

Anyways... I wonder where this maze leads, or are there perhaps multiple exits? or... have I already gone and picked mine? I'm not sure, I never was good at this, this horribly scary thing we call love, just the opposite in fact I would say, bumbling myself into ruin again... and again... and again, tragic I'd say.

My worries define me, refine me, lies. They lead me to avoid my mistakes true, yet they end up causing me to make more. Hope we're not at the point of no return, hope that there's still something to fight for now. That's all I can do sometimes, I'm so weak.

I'm not the most observant of fellows, nor am I the brightest I'd have to say. I miss cues, and I foolishly tread on forwards. I foolishly don't know how to move on, and sometimes I feel, I move on too quick.

I don't know what to do but play the fool, overcommit, or not commit at all. I don't know what to do, I don't know you, I don't know what you really want from me. I don't know what I want from you either, it's all so confusing to me. to you?

I like you, that I know, but you... of me? I'm not too sure I have to say, really.

I worry I'm just an interest, a fad, a piece of fashion to be thrown away. I worry that I'm just being humored, kept complacent since you can't bear conflict. I worry I'm a burden to you too...

I... don't want to be thrown away by you, yet... I don't want to be a burden too, It's so confusing this weak heart of mine, it's too confusing this thing we call love.

I fear as though, it too will fade with time; with it, the memories I hold so dear.

I fear as though, those memories mean not.

But most of all I fear that it's not love, but instead foolish one sided longing.

Longings never answered, words never said. Longings once answered, but taken away. Longings of this heart of mine oh so weak. Longings, worries, burdens, and unsaid fears.

I hope I'll be able to set them free, I hope I will get an answer one day. I hope I'll hear those words

"I. Love. You. Too..."

But sadly... not all hopes will get answered, and not all dreams will ever be fulfilled. That's why they call them hopes and fever dreams, but that's also why I hope and dream still...

I'll keep dreaming, till the day they're not dreams. That's my promise to you, to myself too...