《WTF》13 -Weapon Test Fire
Advertisement
It all started 4000 years ago:
“Destiny Fish!!!!” World Fish screamed through the glass of the operating theatre at the lifeless fish on the autopsy table, Its golden scales unmistakeable. The Possum People scientists cutting into the body stopped and looked over, disturbed by the sudden shouting.
World Fish’s eyes went red. His gaze moved from the body to the scientists, “You! You son’s of…. I’ll never forgive you!” spitting out his wand, he touched the ground, “SHATTERED EGG!” He roared the magic words as tears streamed down his face.
Possum Planet shook.
On the third moon of the planet, the real Destiny fish packed his favourite sculptures into a bubble, “It’s too bad they never succeeded in cloning me hey, Jonesy,” The sentient sock puppet floating alongside him wriggled in agreement, “Would of been sweet to have a twin brother. Oh well, can’t win them all.”
Destiny’s attention was drawn away from his work when the sky lit up. Where Possum Planet once filled the horizon, now only shattered rock and magma remained, “Dude!, What?!”
The same thing happened to the first moon soon after, then the second, “Uhhh, maybe we should, like, get out of here, Jonesy.” Said Destiny. He grabbed his stuff and flew up.
All through the solar system, there was a scream. One filled with pain and fury. As Destiny swam away, another fish swam down and smashed into the third moon.
“Shattered Egg!” World Fish cast the spell again. Without stopping, he got up off the ground and swam out into space searching for something else to destroy. His eyes roved over the stars in the sky looking for the closest.
From behind, a voice called out, “World Fish? Is that you, Dude”
World fish turned, looking back and saw the source of the voice. Destiny fish and a sock puppet. Behind Destiny, the moon exploded, framing him in beautiful magma. Red strings of destiny magic exploded out from both of them and the spell [Destined to meet again] finally ended.
World Fish blinked away tears as the gears in his head spun. Last time he had seen Destiny Fish alive, he had convinced his golden brother to expand his horizons and test destiny magic by casting the destined to meet you spell. World had even offered to be the target. Nothing had happened at the time and they couldn’t figure out why. They eventually gave up and went their separate ways. That was over 30 years ago. Now here they were, floating in space together when all seemed lost, and it all clicked into place.
The Disappearance of Goddess Fish, the infinity maze, the post office mafia, the zombie goose armies: all destiny magic manipulating them towards this moment.
World Fish giggled, trying to hold it in. Then let out a loud, “HAHA,” before slamming his mouth shut. He held it as long as he could before breaking into uncontrollable laughter. What a brilliant spell! He loved the grand scale of it all!
A full minute later he calmed down enough to talk, “Good to see you, Destiny!” his voice was gravelly from having shouted so loud for so long, “I guess that that explains what your spell does. Let’s go home.”
Advertisement
Destiny Fish was confused, he hadn’t figured it out at all yet. He was very glad to see World Fish after so long, however. The wide range of emotions on display was understandable because he was feeling quite emotional too, “Hey! Good to see you too! Home sounds good, dude! Can Jonesy come along?” Destiny gestured to his sock puppet friend.
World eyed the puppet, “No, Jonesy isn’t real,”
Destiny watched as his buddy unwound into destiny strings and vanished, “Duuude… I’m so confused right now!”
Millennia later, at the Hungry Hippo University:
Two fitful hours of sleep was all Fred managed before his door was kicked open by the loudest ten-year-old he’d ever met. Her space karate lessons were really showing results.
In his over-exhausted state, he might have been able to sleep through the sound of his door breaking against his wall. However, he could not ignore the pain of previously mentioned 10-year-old performing a perfectly executed, lung-crushing, somersault, bomb dive onto his guts.
“Fred get up! There's no time for sleep! Guess what?! We’ve been invited to the invention convention! Get up! It’s only in a month and we don’t have anything prepared!” Einstein shouted into his face.
Fred replied by gasping for breath.
Edison’s robotic limbs whirred far too loudly to be unintentional as he strolled in through Fred’s busted door, “What should we invent? I have a few schematics for a cyborg tongue that I think we can get working in time.” He sat down at Fred’s work chair on the opposite side of the room and rested his feet up on the table, knocking over some stationary.
Einstein fake gagged, “Gross, no tongues. No, we need something big! Something to really make a splash for our team’s debut. Something world changing!”
“If we make the tongue big enough…”
“NO TONGUES! Fred, why are you still in bed?! Did you stay up late last night? What were you doing?” Einstein shook him with every question.
“Hehe, at Fred’s age, probably watching naughty videos about tongues.” laughed Edison, pulling out his smarty phone and playing with it.
Fred’s voice was muffled by his pillow “...same age..”
“Whassat?” asked Edison, staring at his phone, drawing a figure eight with his finger.
“RRAAAAAGGHH!” Einstein shrieked as she was thrown off Fred’s body, onto the floor. Fred sat up, “I said we’re the same age, Idiot,” Fred tried to glare at his team, but his eyes were too unfocused, “I wasn’t watching tongue videos; I was… researching World Fish.”
“World Fish? Why?” Asked Einstein, picking herself up off the floor.
“Oh! Didn’t you hear? World fish got moved up to number three now on the…” Edison looked around the room conspiratorially before whispering, “Secret list,” He winked and continued at normal volume, “They found an old satellite from some extinct race with footage of World Fish making them extinct. Hold on,” he typed on his phone a bit, then spun it around so that Einstein could see, “check it out!”
Advertisement
As Einstein watched the footage with her mouth open and eyes wide, Fred threw his covers off and got out of bed. He had lied to his team, he hadn't been studying World Fish last night. The truth was he had been too scared to fall asleep after watching the video Einstein was now watching and had spent the night worrying. Now Edison was making him relive that fear.
It was one thing after another. His anger had been steadily rising from the moment they busted into his room and now his powers were in full effect.
He marched over to Edison and slapped his legs off the table, “Off my chair,” he scowled. Edison relinquished the chair, too shocked for words, “You want ‘world changing’?” he growled, grabbing a paper and a pencil. His pencil almost ripped the paper as he began inventing.
Both Einstein and Edison watched over his shoulder in awe. When Einstein realised what Fred was designing she turned to Edison and whispered, “That could work!”
As Fred’s anger faded, Einstein took over, filling in the blanks in the design and Edison got to work constructing. Scientific process was thrown out the window and the creation was never tested. Instead, it was decided that any use should be reserved only for the most desperate of times, against the most evil of enemies.
Although they eventually missed the invention convention, their machine generated a storm of interest. The Smarty military and space Illuminati picked it up and hid it away in a secret vault, plans already forming on how to use it against their new enemy, the magic fish.
The machine in front of Destiny and Time fish powered down having successfully launched its payload. Destiny Fish screeched his next words in a full panic, “No, Dude, No! It’s Shattered egg! World Fish’s Shattered egg!”
Time fish froze, “You’re joking. The Smarties managed to copy THAT spell?”
“Yes, dude! That spell! We gotta run!” Destiny flew up and urged Time to follow.
Time Fish didn’t move. Now that he knew what was happening, [Time Sense] was feeding him information on the timing of it, "We can't escape in time…” He tilted his head considering, “We can’t both escape,” He looked up at Destiny, “Bro, I can buy you enough time. Run!"
"What are you talking about dude? C'mon…"
"GO NOW DESTINY!!!" Time shouted.
Destiny had never seen Time raise his voice like that. He moved. With one last pleading look behind, He began swimming up as fast as he could. Time Fish, on the other hand, swam down to the ground. Upon making contact, he screamed the magic words, “Frozen Moment!”.
A bubble of time surrounded the entire planet. Outside of [Frozen Moment]’s bubble, time would proceed normally. On the inside, however, it remained still. With a small bubble the size of a Smarty soldier, he could freeze it for weeks. On an entire planet, his [Time Sense] told him the magic would drain in one minute, thirteen seconds.
Time smiled, confident this would be enough time for his friend to escape.
All over Siren magical fish were panicked by the sudden retreat of their enemies, the subsequent world tremors and finally by the global activation of Time Fish's spell. Something bad was happening.
Gate Fish opened a portal to where he had left Dream and Music fish, neither were there anymore. Cursing, he opened a portal to space where Divination and Laser Fish were, “Divination! You gotta tell me where everyone is! We gotta get them out of there!”
Divination went to work, first, she located Mental Fish. She was hiding deep in the ocean. A portal opened beside her.
“Mental, come through! Where’s Narcissist?” Gate fish called through the portal.
Mental fish startled at the sudden voice. She rushed through the portal and hid behind Laser Fish. One word appeared in their minds, “Dead.”
Everyone was silent in shock for a moment before returning to the task at hand.
Next, Divination found Sky and Gravity Fish. They swam through the portal, severely damaged, but alive.
Yeti Fish was recovered next, he informed them that DNA and Pain Fish had chased after the Smarties into the sky. As there are no flying Yetis, he stayed behind.
“Oh no… I found Normal and Virus,” Divination informed them and relayed the location to Gate Fish.
“Why ‘Oh no’?” Gate asked, opening the portal.
Deep underground, surrounded by soil that was frozen in time, Normal Crawfish shook Virus Fish, “Don’t play around Virus, talk to me!” Virus Fish’s one remaining eye had gone blank, “Quit it, Virus!”
The portal opened beside them, Gate peeked through, “Normal, Virus? Oh, Goddess.”
Normal looked up with teary eyes, “Gate Fish? Virus won’t wake up. Help!”
Gate Fish cast a bubble around them and gently pulled them through his portal. The gathered fish inspected Virus, but it was too late, he had succumbed to his wounds.
Virus magic exploded out of his body into the universe. In Wuhan, China, Covid-19 was created.
Divination Fish snapped back to her senses and began searching for the others on Siren within her light. She jerked her head back and closed her eyes. A sudden light blinded her, “What was that?!” she demanded.
One minute, thirteen seconds after being cast, Time Fish's spell ended. The time bubble burst and the shaking began again.
Hidden in a canyon, Music Fish sang to calm the shivering Dream Fish. Fire consumed them.
Elsewhere, Time Fish relaxed and looked up, "Live well, bro." Fire consumed him.
From space where the Magic Fish had gathered and watched, it was silent and beautiful. The world cracked and split apart everywhere all at once. Blooming into a flower of fire and death.
Advertisement
- In Serial6 Chapters
Soul Saver Series
A young man loses his sister in an act of vengeance for his failures. In his grief, he wonders what to do and searches his heart for an answer. In the shining light and the rolling wheels of a train, the answer comes to him. He finds allies and friends that assist him in his journey to find the Seven Elemental Jewels and battles the Agency of the Fallen in order to bring his sister's soul back from the afterlife. During his journey, his ideals and worldview are changed to make him both a better brother, man, and citizen.
8 80 - In Serial31 Chapters
Sector 27
It wasn't until June 3, 2101 that World War 4 ended. This was not a war that ended in peace treaties or truces; this war ended with disease. The atomic war caused plague and disease that crippled major countries. The generals and great leaders of the countries at war died from the radiation that penetrated every part of the globe. It was only then that humanity realized what they had done- what they had created. The first ever mutant was publicly executed the very day the war ended, and a new war began: the war against mutants. The surviving nation of Japan quickly rebuilt their country by dividing it into safe zones, or Sectors. There are currently 26 livable sectors in Japan; Sector 1 is the richest sector and the only sector that has completely rid itself of all radiation left over from the war. In fear against the threat of mutants, the once small section of the police force grew until it became the main police force in Japan. After all, humans shouldn't be blamed for crimes when the real threat to society is mutants. This police force that goes by their motto: Special Treatment Against Mutants (STAM) is comprised of agents that go about their work to capture and detain all mutants. Sector 26 is the poorest sector that humans can barely survive in; but there is one more part of Japan. This "dead zone" has such a high concentration of radiation that if a human were to step inside the barrier, they would die in mere moments. But within this dead zone, this 27th Sector, there lies a secret organization of mutants that fight against STAM and protect all mutants from their grasp. The Mutant Recovery and Protection Agency (MRPA) operates to hide mutants in society and allow them to live human lives. The only thing that stands in MRPA's way is STAM and its agents who hunt them down ruthlessly, so MRPA has their own set of skilled agents. And the battle rages on...
8 145 - In Serial8 Chapters
Lifeward
A journey across reality itself, where magic and science entangle themselves in ancient ruins, primal civilizations, fantastic creatures and space travellers. Marta is being chased by the Indirian Monarchy. Her only hope is to reach the Free Counties and start a millennial war that will decide the very nature of reality. What are the stakes? Well, the universe is surrounded by ether. This substance erases reality, thus it stops the universe from expanding. But the Indirian Monarchy’s plan will reroute the ether to the center of the universe with a magic canal, freeing the universe from its limits. When reality is affected by the ether, everything related to it disappears: the proof of its existence, the memories people hold of it... Marta will be key in an epic spacetime bending war.
8 168 - In Serial16 Chapters
Subterranean
After The Great Wars, an empire made up of beings called "consumers" rule the world and dominate an inferior race, the"subterraneans". There is a final resistance to consumer hegemony put forth by the Sitmians, a tribe of individuals with a unique culture whose origin is shrouded in secrecy. Read chapter one to meet the protagonist Roask and uncover his life as a consumer.
8 149 - In Serial77 Chapters
Lancastre Academy
Parker Gray leads a normal, home-schooled life. Or so he thinks. He begins noticing some odd things happening around the house and then hears his parents talking about him behind his back. Before he knows it, he's being shipped off to a boarding school he's never heard of and won't be able to come home for six years. Right as he starts to accept this, his parents drop him off at an abandoned subway station that is supposed to take him to this new school. The next thing he knows, Parker is being led into a world he didn't know even existed right alongside him. He learns amazing new things about himself and that someone he doesn't know has been keeping an eye on him. I am still in the process of writing book 4 and doing some editing. It will begin posting in the near future.
8 108 - In Serial29 Chapters
Clueless ━━ Fred Weasley
"Briar Crouch is completely and utterly clueless...!"
8 185

