"are you happy?" i was brought back to reality by mrs. owens. "happy with?" i had forgotten what we were even discussing.

"your boyfriend being here? i seen him the other day." her spoon clicked against her glass cup.

i rolled my eyes, "he's not my boyfriend. he cheated on me, so that's that."

"do you think he's following in his father's characteristics?"

"what are you implying?" i questioned.

"maybe it wasn't intentional. i'm not saying forgive him right away, but i regret pushing my husband away because i was angry. i can tell you love him." she had a point.

i thought for a little bit before returning back home.

fezco was sitting on the couch as if he was waiting for my arrival. "ryder, hey!"

i was confused by his greeting only because i knew he had been trying, but he still didn't want to force things on me.

"hey fez, what's up?" i leaned against the bar.

he walked over tucking my hair behind my ear, "are you okay?" he sounded concerned. after my little bloody accident he rushed me to the emergency room.

i was okay, but also just stressed out.

"yes i'm okay. i went over next door to talk about things, what's up?" without realizing i smiled for the first time towards him.

he smiled back, "we need something bigger. it's only your room and ashtray's. i'm getting tired of the couch plus noah will need his own room. are you willing to m-"

"sure." i didn't budge any.

"is that okay? you don't seem too interested." he followed me into my room. "i understand. it's not worth putting up a fight. i'll move another fifty two times for you."

i sat down crisscrossed on my bed with my head against my bed frame.

it wasn't any longer than a couple minutes before i had broken down into tears. fezco ran to my side, "what's wrong?" he brought me in for a hug.

"i love you and i want you, but damn it fez you hurt me so bad. i- i haven't even grasp the fact that you fucked someone else and yet, here i am still having sex with you. you left me on read after finding out i'm having a boy. i can't be with you, but i want to."

he didn't speak i'm sure because he didn't know what to say.

both of our arms dropped from the hug. "can we try, but take things slow?" he asked already knowing that my answer was no.

•

"how did you know you were pregnant?"

"i did not think i'd be having this conversation with you, axel. please!" i laughed swimming to the other side of his pool to avoid the question.

"no seriously, ryder im curious." he continued.

i huffed, "i was still really sick after taking all my medication for a stomach virus, but i had also missed my period. it just kinda all made sense to take a test, so i did."

i noticed he smiled like he had enjoyed something out of the short story. "was he happy?"

now that's one thing i couldn't answer. "truthfully, axe i'm not sure." it was one thing to assume, but i had never really gotten the opportunity to talk about everything with fez.

"i'm gonna go." i exited the pool trying to make it home before the boys had waken up. "i hope i didn't upset you." he frowned.

everything about him was perfect including his manners and kindness. it made me feel like i was stupid for even putting him in a predicament with fezco.

"you didn't, i promise!" i smiled skipping down the street.

i walked inside to ashtray putting makeup on fez while he was sleeping. "damn, he snores loud as hell."

"yeah, that shit woke me up so i'm getting him back."

i rolled my eyes now it's obvious he likes me and even if my feelings were strong for him i just couldn't.

i heard screaming from the living room so i assumed that fez saw his face. "who you texting?" he snatched my phone before i could lock it.

he read the messages didn't say anything, but his face dropped a little.

"i have a doctors appointment in about two hours if you wanna join?" i asked changing the subject. fez's smile returned, "i'd love to."

i took a shower and got ready. i was still so nervous about why he wasn't mad about axel. there's still a fear in me that fez is on a killing spree, or just a almost near death beating spree.

"i'm read-" i stopped before i seen him looking fucking fine. "oh, wow... you're a cute dad or what not."

"dad? that's so weird you usually call me daddy." he smirked.

"fuck!" i yelled, "stop because you know what you're doing." i grabbed the keys from the counter as he grabbed my ass. "i don't know what you mean." he laughed.

the doctor was able to take us in sooner since we came early plus it was a tuesday so things were slow i assumed.

"such a healthy baby boy. is this dad?" the doctor asked me as she pointed to fezco. "yes, that's him." i kept my eyes on the monitor.

"want to hear his heartbeat?" she grinned at him because he had such a terrifying, nervous expression going on.

she played noah's heartbeat for us and fez's face look like it had flash before his eyes.