"Jay it's okay. Come here." I say while sitting down next to him. He leans into me and buries his face into my neck. I don't know why this happened, but seeing him like this breaks my heart. "Come on. Let's go home." He nods and we start to get up. Someone runs into the building and heads toward us. "Is he okay? Do I need to call someone?" They stutter out. They're obviously panicking.

"No it's okay. I got him. Thank you."

"O-okay"

He was silent the whole drive home. His eyes are still watery and bloodshot from crying so much. I look over and he's playing with his fingers like you do when you're nervous. What happened?

I broke down at the firework show. I knew this could happen, but I wanted to be strong, for Erin. I don't know what to say. Sorry? I knew this was gonna happen? I need help? I don't know anymore. I've seen some of my buddies get PTSD. I always thought it was for the weak, sometimes I just thought it was a myth. When Mouse drug me home from last time, that was just because of grief. I had lost one of my best buds. I was a spotter for IED's and land mines. I spotted a land mine on the trail and I picked up my radio to warn them, and I watched them, my own men, run right over it.

"Erin. I'm sor-"

"Don't be sorry Jay. It's not your fault."

"I am sorry though. I knew there was a chance of this happening. I just ignored that thought."

"It's okay. You're gonna be fine."

I nod in agreement. Will I be though? If fireworks did this to me, what happens with an actual gun? Or my job? Oh God, my job?!