Jungkook's POV

"Tae, will you help me reach out to my father? I-I think it's time, but I'm really scared." A cold shiver moves up my spine.

"Of course, I will, Kookie. What would you like me to do?"

"Uh, open my computer and help me to pull up my email." I am restless and shift in my chair as my hands shake.

"Kookie, I know that feeling with my own father, Mr. Choi. I'm happy to help and support you." I give Tae my password and he opens my computer and clicks on the email icon. And there it is. Father's email. The subject line reads 'Merry Christmas Bunny'.

"Oh Kookie! He calls you bunny. That's so sweet." Tae sounds gleeful which helps me to calm down just a bit.

"Y-You don't think that's childish?"

"No Kookie, of course not. It's sweet and very loving. I can read it if you like. If it's not too difficult." I close my eyes tightly and take in a calming breath as I reach over gripping his hand firmly. I nod my head and I softly whisper, "okay."

Tae has yet to start reading and my chest starts to tighten. I don't know how I will react, but I am happy that Tae is here with me.

"Merry Christmas, Bunny. I hope you are well this Christmas day. I pray that you have found joy in your life and that you are not alone. I think of you every day. But Christmas is always especially hard because I miss my son so much. I busy myself, helping others. It lessens the loneliness, and it is very fulfilling."

"Bunny, there is something special about this Christmas. I just feel it. Each Christmas I feel hopeful that this will be the Christmas that I will talk to my bunny. That is the most for which I could hope. I am very hopeful today. I will continue to love you until I stop breathing."

"Father."

As Tae's soft voice stops, I sit in stillness as my eye-gaze is lost in the mountain view, however my stare is vacant. I feel numb and not a part of my body anymore. It's as if I am hoovering from above looking down and observing. I pull in a deep breath and slowly return to my body. My numbness changes into an electricity that builds from my core. It's a warm comfort that starts to expand through my chest, torso, and limbs.

"Oh, Tae he never stopped loving me." I hold on to the anchor of Tae's hand and start to shake. He wraps his arms around me, as my tears start to flow, and I begin releasing my pain and joy. I have never allowed anyone so close, yet I know I am safe in his arms. I hold on to him until I'm ready and then pull away. He sits quietly by my side with a gentle smile. He simply waits to give me whatever I need. How could I not love this man?

"Tae, I want to respond. What should I do?"

"What do you want to do Kookie? You can email or call. You could also do a uh... video chat. Whatever you decide, I'm here for you." I see in his eyes only a sincere desire to be helpful.

"What? Really? No, no that's too much." I fidget with my top shirt button. "But I'd like to hear his voice. I just hope I don't get angry at him again Tae. It's been so long, and I now know it was not intentional. He was hurt like me and not capable of managing his pain or caring for a child. He provided for my safety and just had nothing emotionally for me or himself. I don't think that makes him bad, just human." Tae continues to nod and softly rub my arm passing on his warmth to me.

"Kookie, you can ask for his phone number. And then you can call when you're ready." I nod quickly and breathe.

"What shall I type, Kookie?" Tae looks to me for guidance to convey my message to father.

'Something simple Tae." My brain is a bit fogged and I'm so grateful Tae is with me. I'm certain that I could not do this alone.

"How about 'Merry Christmas. Please send me your phone number and I would like to speak with you.' How's that Kookie?" I nod and hear Tae typing a fast message and he stops. It is done and it has been sent. Immediately, there is an unexpected release of tension. I swallow and feel my shoulders go slack as a heavy weight is lifted off my chest. A weight that has been there I believe since mother died. Is this possible? The Awakening relieved the weight, but it would return when I thought of mother and father. I have forgiven father. An epiphany overwhelms me. Forgiveness was the vital requirement for my healing.

"Tae, it's like 3:00 am in South Korea. He might not see it for quite a while." As soon as I finish my sentence, Tae's eyes go big, and his mouth falls open as he looks at the computer screen.

"Oh my God Kookie! He responded! He's been waiting and hoping Kookie." Tae clicks on the email and there it is. His phone number. The weight is gone but I am afraid.

"I-I don't know. Maybe I should think about it and call him later." My bottom lip trembles and Tae takes my hand.

"Kookie you never answered Yea's question on the plane."

"What?" I am bewildered and unsure of his meaning.

"After I told my story about the bunnies she asked if you were a risk taker. Well, are you Kookie?" I look down at my phone.

"It's like jumping off a cliff, but I'll jump with you Kookie."

"Tae, you will jump with me?"

"You know I will sweetheart." Our chairs are side by side and he leans over and softly nuzzles his shoulder into my arm. And in that faintness of his touch, I believe I can do this.

I slowly pull my phone forward. My eyes focus on the computer screen, and I start to press in his number. My hands shake so badly that Tae takes over the process and inputs father's phone number.

As the phone rings, I squeeze Tae's hand tighter as my breath becomes laborious.

"Bunny?"

I look at Tae as I hear his voice. He sounds as I remember him. Suddenly I am ten years old all over again and thoughts are garbled.

"Are you there, son?" My mouth is suddenly dry and I'm unsure of what to say. I am like a child that has not developed their speech yet.

"It's okay. I can hear you breathing, and if that is all you can do it is enough for me." I just listen as Tae continues to show me his sweet smile and be present with me. He puts no pressure on me and just allows me to be as I am in this moment. Little, excited, frightened, and hopeful.

"Son, I hope that your Christmas has been good. Now that you have called me, this is the best Christmas that I have had in many years." He then goes quiet and just waits. I just breathe and stay in the moment. As my feelings move through me, I become clearer on what I want to do.

"F-Father?" I stammer.

"Yes son?" His voice is low yet anticipatory.

"Uh, Merry Christmas, father." I hear a soft gasp and his breath hitch as if he has been plowed down by his feelings.

"Merry Christmas son! Oh Jungkook, I'm so sorry." His breath quickens and I hear him sniffling. I believe he is sobbing. My eye well with tears as I hear his tormented pain. Pain which I am able to identify with.

"Uh can we video, uh chat. I-I'd like to see you father." I decide to be a risk taker. Tae gently squeezes my hand, and I can feel joy and excitement radiate off of him. Good thing I am not alone. My boyfriend is with me.

"Bunny, I would like that very much." There is an uplift of excitement in father's voice as a strong need to connect with him rises within me.

Tae's POV

I help Kookie set-up a video chat with his dad. It is his special moment and I smile as I watch him and feel his excitement. I'm so happy for Kookie. I don't know what his future will be with his father, but what's important is that he has made a start. Needy Tae is all smiles and offers to loan Kookie his Teddy bear. I smile at his sweetness. I thank him and tell him Kookie will be okay.

Needy Tae relates to Kookie because they are both very little emotionally. I'm so very grateful that Kookie has lowered all of his walls and allows me to enter a very vulnerable space. Yes, I want to be with this man.

The video starts and Kookie's father is very handsome. For about two minutes he is silent as his father talks. His eyes are wet as he tells Kookie about his holiday and how he has worked helping others. Kookie then shares with him about the Christmas brunch. It is a very easy conversation and I even hear Kookie chuckle. I sit off to the side out of camera view. I hope to meet him later at another time.

"Father, what have you been up to?" Kookie and his father keep the conversation light and don't talk about the past. I believe that they both are still in shock of the miracle that they are both experiencing.

Kookie tells his father he is in Alaska stranded. Kookie then looks over to me. Unexpectedly, he pulls me over in camera view.

"Father this is my boyfriend Taehyung, and he is very important to me. I'd like you to know him."

"Hello Taehyung, I'm very happy to meet you. I look forward to meeting you personally when you both return to South Korea." I see Kookie has his beautiful eyes which makes me smile.

"Uh, father we are not sure when we will return. Tae and I have a lot to work out and we will start making plans tomorrow for our future." As Kookie talks his eyes remain on me with a very loving smile. I feel a fluttering of butterflies in my belly as Needy Tae claps wildly.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Kookie's dad says as I hear a drop in his upbeat spirit for the first time. "So, you have no plans to return soon."

"Father, I want to see you. I'd like to talk with you and work out our relationship. I-I'm so sorry I judged you so harshly. I refused to talk with you and now we have lost so many years." Kookie's head slowly lowers.

"Bunny, no! It was me and not you. You were a child. I was unable give you what you needed. A loving parent through the darkest and worst moment of your life. It is I who am sorry, and I just hope that one day you might forgive me." Tears run down his face as I fight to hold back my own tears.

"Father, I already have forgiven you."

"What? Y-You forgive me?"

"Yes, father I have."

"Jungkook, if you would allow it. Once you and Taehyung are settled and find that you are extending your time in the US, I'd be happy to come there and be with you. That's if it's not too much too soon. Taehyung I would also like to meet you. I can see joy in my Bunny's eyes, and I know that he cares for you deeply."

"Teehee," I feel my cheeks heat up and can't help but to tuck my chin and divert my eyes.

Kookie and his father are connecting so well. He actually looks relaxed and happy. His beautiful smile is big and bright. When my phone rings I look over to Kookie and show him who is call. It is my father from South Korea. Kookie nods and lets me know he is okay. I walk to my room and answer the call.

"Merry Christmas father!" I am truly happy for his call. I had hoped we'd talk today.

"Merry Christmas Tae. How are you doing son?"

"I'm doing very well. Things are going great and I'm actually enjoying my time in Alaska. This place is amazing. Thanks for making such special arrangements for me and uh, Jungkook."

"Of course, you are my son. I'll always take care of you. If you would let me."

"Father let's not go there today. It's Christmas. I do well and don't need anyone taking care of me!"

"I'm sorry Tae. I know you are sharing a suite with Mr. Jeon. So, you're on first name bases, are you?"

"Yes, we are," I say with an upbeat in my voice.

"Tae you watch out for him!" He warns me in a way that sounds more like a command, and I immediately feel defensive.

"Father he's a very nice man and I like him."

"Tae please. You are too good and naive. You have no idea who he is and what he's done."

"What he's done? What are you talking about?" I'm startled by the harshness I hear in my voice as well as his judgment of Kookie.

"Did he tell what he does?"

"He's a businessperson, father. Just like you."

"No Tae. He has a reputation of being quite ruthless. He's the worst kind of businessperson." I swallow hearing father and know I should stop him, but I don't. Snippy Tae is sitting up alert and listening while Needy Tae has his fingers in his ears and is humming. He is unwilling to listen. Kookie and I haven't talked about specifics yet. Father continues as I lower myself to sit on my bed.

"Tae, this guy takes advantage of companies that are in trouble. He buys them at a sinfully low price. He then restructures the companies and breaks them apart. He replaces people with machines and computers to increase his financial gain. As a result, people lose their jobs and fall into financial ruin. Son, families are devastated. I think what he does is criminal. Do not get close to him. He will use you and abandon you. You stay clear of him! Do you hear me Tae?"

"Father please don't tell me what to do! You know I don't like it!" Snippy Tae steps in. "You have a past also. Your life wasn't so perfect, and you have suffered consequence." Oh God, I have said too much as the phone goes quiet.

"Tae! I never hurt families or sought to hurt anyone while growing my business!"

Suddenly, Savage Tae pushes Snippy Tae aside as he senses father's tone.

"No, you only hurt me! You ignored me for years and want to control me!" I bite my lip and breathe. This is out of my hands as Needy Tae is looking for his teddy bear.

"Tae, I'm so sorry. I-I don't want to control you. I am not a perfect man. I just love you and I sense that you may care about him. I only want to protect my son. I come across strong because I could not bear to lose you or see you hurt. I cannot express how much I regret not being there for you. I-I just wanted to wish you Merry Christmas and tell you I love you. I know I cannot change the past. Please just be careful." I sit with my head down and hear cracks in my father's voice. It is shocking. He is a man that does not easily express his feelings. I know he is sincere. He does not know Kookie or understand the Awakening.

I know I have totally overreacted. Father and I have come a long way with our relationship. I may have set us back. I tell Snippy Tae and Savage Tae to shut the fuck up and return to their corner. Needy Tae has found his teddy bear and in a gentle voice I tell him it will be okay. He nods and hugs his teddy.

"Father, please forgive me. What I said was disrespectful. I will be careful, and I love you. You will never lose me, and I love you too. Now tell me how your Christmas has been."

Ten minutes later we are laughing and having a wonderful time. I tell him about Yea and Song. I also tell him how wonderful Yeona was.

"Tae, did you consider what we talked about before you left?"

"Father, I appreciate the offer but I'm a doctor. I love being a doctor."

"But Tae, you'd be perfect, and you could help so many people. We'll talk about it at a later date," I chuckle because he is tenacious and never gives up or sees anything as impossible. That is the part of him that is in me. My mother was the first to recognize it.

Father tells me that we'll be in Alaska for a few more days as a large storm is coming in tonight. I don't feel discouraged hearing that news. Kookie and I need time. Now the work and conversation will begin. The cliff is approaching, and I'm scared.

We end the call on a good note, but I have questions and feel uneasy. I heard everything my father said. But I also know that Kookie has changed. I believe in him and the Awakening.

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