THIRD PERSON'S POV

Sunlight peaked through windows making it's way towards the sleeping Mustafa tickling his face with it's rays making him groan in sleep and hide his face inside his wife's neck, sighing in satisfaction inhaling her scent, tickling her neck with his beard in the process.

Her eyes shot open immediately sensing someone breathing on her neck and by the sparks she knew it was none other than her own husband. A smile made it's way towards her face finding it adorable the way he was clutching onto her, reminding her of Noor.

Her fingers automatically made their way to his dishevelled hair sticking his forehead, brushing them away admiring his sleepy form, when she felt his fingers brushing her naked waist freezing her entire form.

Last night flashed before her eyes stilling her heart. Tears formed in her eyes remembering what she asked him to do in her vulnerable state. She didn't regretted consummating their marriage but did regretted doing it when she wasn't in her senses, when she was vulnerable. She loved him and no matter how much she tried staying away from him she wasn't able to, her heart yearned for him. It had been yearning for him for years and now when it finally had him, it was at peace, leaving her mind at chaos.

It was like war was raging inside her. Between her own mind and heart. Heart wanted him with mind giving red signals remembering past. Heart screamed to give him another chance, and mind was hell bent on protecting heart from hurting more.

A painful sigh escaped her lips closing her eyes trying to keep her tears at bay. Their relationship was already going through a sensitive phase and getting intimate could only complicate things further. He would now expect her to behave normal with him but that wasn't possible even if she wanted to. She was too hurt to behave normal.

Taking deep breaths she tried slipping off his hold making him groan and tighten his hold over her, making her still for few moments before trying again, getting successful this time.

Sitting up, she wore his white shirt from last night turning to give him a last look, when she heard him mumbling against the pillow she replaced with herself.

"My jaani."

More tears escaped her eyes when she bowed her head towards his face pecking his forehead with a sad smile, pain in her heart.

•

Coming out of the shower the first thing she noticed was the empty bed, racing her heart. He was awake and she was scared to face him.

Lost in her thoughts she never noticed when a familiar cologne hit her nostrils and before she could react, two arms snaked around her waist in a tight grasp with the person kissing her neck from the back humming in satisfaction.

"Aap ?"

(You.)

Turning her head a little she asked, finding smile on his face, his eyes still closed.

"Yes, me your beloved husband."

He whispered rubbing his cold nose over her warm neck tickling it with his wet hair, sending shivers down all her form with his actions.

"You smell heavenly biwi."

Smiling he complimented her, turning her around to look into her eyes taking hold of her warm cheeks between his warm hands, gazing at her who was looking down unable to meet his eyes.

"I...."

She tried speaking but was unable to form any word finding herself speechless, afraid to look at him.

"Look at me...."

Her behaviour was wierd scaring his heart, dread filling inside it which he ignored, happiness overpowering his senses to which he took hold of her chin, trying to catch glimpse of her eyes trying to find same happiness in her eyes just like his, but what he saw crushed his heart to ends. She wasn't meeting his eyes and it seemed like she regretted last night.

"You regret it. Don't you ? Tell me ?"

Holding her hand he asked, ignoring the silent cries of his heart which was bursting with pain finding regret in her eyes. He prayed for it to be a dream, but it was not. She regretted the night of their union, the beautiful night they shared together.

The night which was etched in his memory forever.

"I.... Meri baat sunein."

(Listen to me.)

It was his painful voice which made her meet her eyes with him. She wanted to tell him she didn't, but would he believe her if she did ?

The only thing she regretted was the wrong timing. Everything happened too quickly that they didn't even got to establish thier relation properly.

She was insecure, she was scared to the extent that she had created big walls around herself afraid to get hurt again and It was her defense mechanism to get away from him whenever she felt the walls around her crumbling with his efforts.

Only Allah knew how much she wanted to move on, to trust him again but she was scared. She was scared to be his second choice. She was scared to get broken again, with him choosing another girl over her, again. It was difficult to move on but she needed assurity from his side again and again that this time their were together, forever.

"Just answer my question."

His eyes pleaded, and his voice cracked with pain finding his nightmares come true looking inside her eyes.

"Please.....just for once.. I...."

Walking towards him she tried holding his hand, pleading him to hear her but he wasn't ready. The only thing he wanted was her answer on which his whole sanity was depending upon.

"HAAN YA NA ?"

(Yes or no ?)

Jerking his hands away from her hold he took two steps back, feeling his cold self surfacing from the depths of his being, making him look the same old man he was four years ago. The man who was unknown to her.

She felt she was seeing someone unknown not her Mustafa but there was something she saw in his eyes which compelled her to go and hold him tightly finding him breaking just like her, the difference being he was hiding everything unlike her who was always transparent with her emotions.

"No, I don't but...."

Tears leaked out of her eyes with desperation to explain her fears to him, knowing he would understand them but this time he wasn't ready to listen, too hurt to hear her out.

"Ahhh.... the but's in the answer means you do and don't you dare lie to me."

Heart rested in peace hearing she didn't regretted anything when everything changed to that of a destructive strom hearing 'but' in her sentence.

Anger cursed through his veins hearing her. He felt used. Did his emotions meant nothing to her ? Did the confession of last night meant nothing to her ? Was everything happened between them was just a night stand nothing else ? Were there no emotions of her's involved last light ? Did she used him to forget everything which was disturbing her ?

His thoughts were interrupted when he found her soft body clinging onto his torso with her sobs vibrating inside the whole room.

"NO!! Stop right there."

Pushing her lightly he created distance between them, feeling too angry to hold her but it was her sobs and tearful orbs which screamed at him to embrace her tightly in his arms and to never let her go.

No matter how hurt he was he wasn't able to look tears in her eyes paining him to see her like that but he controlled the desires of his heart just like he did in the past, keeping a stoic face in front of her.

"Please....."

"I said NO. You know I am feeling used right now. You used me..... I..."

Words faltered with the intensity of anger he was feeling raging inside him which he was keeping at bay looking at her face. Her innocent face. No matter how much she hurt him he wasn't able to let out his anger at her knowing she was emotionally vulnerable yesterday but that didn't mean he would forgive her easily. He was hurt to the extent that looking at her face was making him insane.

"Aap meri baat to sunein Mustafa. Just please hear me out for once."

He laughed loudly hearing her. Explanation ? Was there any explanation or reason behind her actions other than she regretted consummating their marriage. No there wasn't any.

Maybe he would give her a chance afterwards but right now he was too angry to hear anything from her. He was afraid he would say something which will hurt her from his side.

"What do you want from me to now ? Haven't I done my job well to make you forget everything or you want me to do something more ?"

He spat seeing hurt flash across her face making him close his eyes, cursing himself for hurting her.

"Mustafa I....."

She again tried but he stopped her showing her a helpless look, stopping her from speaking further.

"I will do anything for you jaani, but the pain you have caused me is too much to bear. I can't explain how much hurt and angry I am."

Taking few steps away from her radar he pleaded softy and this time she was able to feel his emotions by the pain reflecting through his misty eyes, making her feel guilty and helpless. Guilty for not being able to tell him her reasons and helpless because he was being too stubborn to listen to her.

"And you know what the worst part is ? I want to lash my anger at you but I am unable to. Mohabbat ne mujhe itna majboor kar rakha hai ke main aap par apna gussa bhi zahir nahi kar sakta. No matter what I can't hurt you more than I already have."

(My love for you had me so helpless that I am unable to express my anger towards you.)

Giving her a last glance he left her alone inside the room to cry for breaking him. His misty eyes holding pain were flashing in front of her making her curse herself. But what she could do ? He wasn't ready to listen to her. At all.

•

Pondering over her plans to talk with him she was busy walking inside the room when she saw Sadia dadi entering the room with a smile on her face.

"Are dadi jaan aap... Do you need something ?"

"No, I just came here to ask about your health. How are you know ? Are feeling better ?"

Patting her cheeks she asked, concern visible in her eyes to which Maria smiled polietly even when she was in no mood to smile, feeling miserable after hurting him.

"I am good dadi jaan."

Few moments passed in silence and she started playing with the tassels of her dupatta when she felt dadi holding her hand, speaking again.

"I am happy. So happy for both of you.... At first I was a little unsure of your relationship but after yesterday I am glad that you both are together....."

"Dadi ammi...."

Maria wasn't sure where the conversation was heading to, but she sat silently watching dadi ammi taking a deep breath before speaking again.

"I am sorry for that day but I was only looking out for you, as you know Mustafa has been previously married to Asmara so, I was only checking if he is the same person or he really has changed as Rubana has told me...."

She again paused looking at Maria's expressions which were blank but she was eagerly waiting for dadi ammi to go wanting to know about everything about his relationship with Asmara.

"Back then when he was married to Asmara he looked like a robot, devoid of any emotions or feelings. You know he didn't even had time for family, the people he adored the most. The only thing which was in his mind was office and hospital. He was a workaholic but now, I am seeing a different Mustafa. It's like he had again switched back to his old self and the reason is you."

Smiling, she patted Maria's head with adoration filled in her old eyes. So, it was true he loved her not Asmara. Then why did he married her ? Back then he told her that he liked Asmara but dadi ammi was narrating a whole different story confusing her to no end.

"You know yesterday when I informed him of your health he went insane, his face went pale as if he was the one who was unwell, not you...."

Happiness glimmered in her old eyes caressing Maria's cheeks who was silent with strom of regret brewing inside her heart, hearing badi dadi. Her heart burned after hurting him, remembering the agonised look he gave in the morning.

"Mustafa aapse bahut mohabaat karte hai beta... My old eyes see unconditional love in his eyes for you, the love which made him find his lost happiness, you...... Aur hum dua karte hai ke aap dono humesha khush rahein."

(Mustafa loves you so much my dear.)

Aameen.

Her heart whispered along with dadi ammi, which she agreed with praying for their happiness in the future and now she was more determined to sort out everything between them, even if meant tieing him to the chair to clear all his misunderstanding.

•

Gathering courage she entered inside her new room to talk with him, finding it devoid of any light, darkness engulfing her in it's arms with moonlight being the only source of light and hope of goodness in the dark night.

Peeking through windows her eyes feel upon their balcony which was open, watching curtains blowing through winds as her legs immediately took her towards it, her heart beating wildly inside her chest feeling his presence there.

"Mustafa...."

A relieved sigh escaped her lips finding him standing there with his back turned towards her. His broad shoulders went stiff hearing her voice but he didn't dared to turn, completely ignoring her presence.

Taking deep breaths she walked towards him with determination to talk with him. Her heart was heavy for making him upset and she wanted to clear all the misunderstanding with him, even if that meant voicing out her insecurities with him.

"Musta..... Ye aap kya kar rahe hai ?"

(What are you doing ?)

Her eyes bulged out her sockets seeing him smoking mercilessly as her hands made their way towards the slow poison in his hand which he retreated immediately not letting her touch it. He only smoked when he was too much stressed. She was reason behind his stress and she was determined to talk with him for him, for his and her heart's peace.

"Go away."

His cold voice vibrated through her ears and the way it sound so distant, devoid of any warmth, pained her to the extent that she closed her eyes feeling her heartbeats quicken, remembering the day when she consoled him. He was same just like that day. So cold and so distant.

"NO! I won't and I won't leave till you hear me out."

She screamed having enough of his ignorance, standing up on her toes, jerking his collar towards her, bending him, with now both of them coming face to face.

For a second she saw surprise in his eyes but it went away as soon as she saw it, with now his eyes same as before; cold.

"Speak..."

His whispered bringing the lit cigrette to his lips with help of his long fingers ready to take another puff of it, when she tried snatching from his strong hold only to get burned with it, making her hiss and retreat her hands at an instant.

Groaning in displeasure he held her hand inspecting it carefully, finding a bright red mark on it, making him glare at her which she was oblivious off finding the lit cigrette between his lips, irritating her.

"You hurt yourself...."

"I don't care. Just throw that nasty thing away."

Jerking her hand off his she again aimed for the cigrette, finding him removing it himself, crushing it with his feet.

"Happy ? Come I'll dress your wound."

Without waiting for her reply he held her hand, making her to sit on the bed, while he went towards the drawer to fetch fist aid box for her small wound.

"Leave it and listen to me."

Snatching her hand away from his hold she held them with her soft ones, desperate for him to hear her out, to which he nodded looking at her, sighing in defeat, making her smile a little with teary leaking out of her eyes.

"I don't...."

Before she could talk, the door of their room opened revealing little Noor, who was sobbing rubbing her cheeks which were red with continuous crying.

"Mama....."

"What happened baby ?"

Standing up, both of them rushed towards the door where the little angel was standing engulfing her in her arms, rubbing her back after wiping her tears.

"I s-saw a ba-bad d-drewme."

Hiding her face in her mother's neck she cried clutching to her tightly, feeling scared.

"It's okay meri jaan. Mama is here. Don't be afraid."

Kissing her hair repeatedly, she stood up with Noor in her arms, forgetting about her tears and her husband, remembering her baby Noorie who needed her support.

"Mama I want to sleep with you and baba."

Pulling out her face from her mother's neck Noor looked at her mother, her lower lip wobbling ready to cry.

"Of course you can princess."

Mustafa answered walking towards them, wiping his daughter's tears kissing her both cheeks, making Maria's heart beat loudly finding him closer to her, with his breath tingling her neck.

"Why are crwying mama ? Did you saw the monster too ?"

Frown marred Noor's face finding her mother's eyes red to which she cupped her cheeks, running her fingers on her mother's swollen eyes, her own eyes welling up looking at her mama.

"I am fine Noorie."

She tried smiling but failed miserably, feeling Mustafa's heated gaze over herself. Her heart felt exploding with pain seeing him back to his old self.

"No mama you cried. Baba see mama is crying."

Ignoring her mother's answer she turned towards her father to prove herself right, finding him staring her mother and then turn towards her when she called him.

"Noorie...."

"Give her magic kissy baba."

Noor demanded remembering how her baba's magic kisses lifted her mood when she was sad.

"Baby I am fine."

"NO!! Baba make mama smile. Give her magic kissy."

Keeping her hand over her mother's mouth she shut her up, turning her head towards her father who was frozen on his spot hearing her demand.

"Magic kiss is only for you Noorie."

Giving his daughter a helpless look he explained not wanting to kiss his wife in current circumstances. Only if everything would have been right he would have done it without Noor's instance, but alas everything was not fine.

"But mama is sad and she cried because she saw a mownster..."

Pouting her pink lips feeling sad, she looked at her father who was not ready to kiss her sad mother.

"Noorie...."

"I won't talk to you. You are so bad baba."

Tearing her gaze from her father, she again started crying hiding her face in her mother's neck, making her parents helpless with her wish.

"We will not talk with him mama. He is bad. So bad."

Sobbing, she continued crying complaining about her father to her mother who was rubbing her back trying to calm her down.

"Okay! Okay! I'll give your mama magic kiss Noorie, but don't cry."

As soon as those words left his mouth Noor stopped crying and wiped her tears with her small hands and grinned at her father, calling him towards them.

Sighing Mustafa walked towards his daughter and wife, leaning down pecking his wife's cheek quickly, hitching her breath, making both of their hearts race with mere contact.

"Baba!!!"

Noor glared at her father making him groan which Maria was oblivious about, confusing her to which she turned her head towards Mustafa to ask about it, but what he did next made her freeze on her spot.