𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐓

sometimes she hides herself to just to see if she's worth looking for

in her room, trying to stay clear of everyone, especially Paul. She knew what she did was wrong and stupid, but she was angry and upset. She doesn't want to be pushed onto someone she barely knows. She doesn't want the universe telling her what to be or who to be with. She's independent and she don't need no man.

But, why does she ache? Why is there a part of her that wants to be near him? Why is there a part of her that wants to find out how they end up?

"Clary!" Charlie's voice from downstairs startled her, making her flinch and stand up quickly. "There's someone here to see you."

Upon smelling Paul's scent, Clary freaked out and ran towards her window that was faced towards the woods. Quickly, before Charlie could yell for her again, she jumped through the window, landing on her feet, before sprinting into the woods.

Slowing down, she thought she was in the clear, but she was mistaken when a body collided with hers and they both fell to the ground.

"What the hell!" Clary shouted in anger and her eyes glowed as she looked at the culprit. But, she froze when she noticed that it was Paul.

"We need to talk," was all he said, standing up, looking in her eyes with a vulnerability behind his. Clary sighed and crossed her arms, looking anywhere but at him. "Why did you run away... again?" There was hurt in his voice.

Clary pursed her lips and looked down at the ground. "I... I don't know. I just... I freaked out. I don't want the universe telling me who the fuck I am suppose to be with. Okay? And, honestly, I don't know why it chose you." She didn't see the hurt look that was shown in Paul's eyes. "Its not the fact that you're a terrible choice... It's that your good."

"What?" He mumbled, confused on where she was going with this.

"I am not a good person, Paul," she told him, finally meeting his eyes. She wanted him to see who she really was. "I am not like Bella, okay? I am evil, I am dangerous, and I have killed. I am not good for you nor will I ever be. My life is messed up. It's dangerous and wild and chaotic, and there is no place for someone like you in it."

"So, what you're saying is that I am in danger if I am with you?" He questioned, his eyebrows furrowed. He let out a booming laugh when she nodded. "I am a shifter, Clary!" He exclaimed, throwing his hands out. "And I know you are, too. There's not much difference between us."

Clary scoffed. "I am not a shifter, Paul. I am a werewolf. A hybrid, actually. I am a friggin' witch and werewolf, the two most dangerous, uncontrolled species alive. I am a fucking ticking time bomb! I don't have control!"

"I don't either!" He shouted right back at her before taking a deep breath. "I don't have control, either. Once someone angers me — and it's pretty easy to — I shift and I attack. I can't help it. I have I.E.D." He crossed his arms. "Just like I said; we are not that different, you and I. We both do not have control and we are both something supernatural."

"I am an abomination, a freak!" She shouted, growing angrier and angrier as the conversation goes on.

"No, you are not!" He screamed, shaking, his whole body tense. He took in a breath, calming himself. He did not want to hurt her. "You're not." He took a step towards her and placed the palm of his hand on her cheek, wiping away a tear that she did not know had fallen. "You're unique, different, beautiful. Just because you're different, it doesn't mean you're a freak." He gave her a soft smile. "If you're a freak, so am I."

"I'm not what you want," she whispered, closing her eyes.

Paul sighed and closed his eyes. He knew what he was about to do would hurt a lot, but he had to, especially after seeing Clary the way she was. "It's okay if you want to reject me," he hesitantly spoke which made Clary snap her eyes open in surprise.

"I..." she trailed off, biting her lower lip.

"I can see how much this pains you and how much you don't want to be forced into a relationship. Trust me, I don't either, but I'm glad that it was you even if you don't want to be with me." Even though it hurt like a son of a bitch to say these things, he had to. He didn't want to make it seem like she was being forced into something she didn't want.

"...I understand it must hurt saying those things," she hesitantly spoke, sniffling. She was feeling his pain. "I don't understand how this happened. My type of wolf does not have this sort of thing." She sucked in a shaky breath. "But... It'd be wrong of me to not give you — us — a chance."

After all, the day they all hung out together at the beach, playing football, they got along decently. And he wasn't a bad person, that she could tell so far, so she had no real reason to turn him down.

Paul opened his eyes and sucked in a shaky breath. He had hope shining in his chocolate eyes that warmed Clary's heart. "So... you're not rejecting me?"

Clary shook her head. "I'm not... but, if this thing isn't something I want, then you're going to have to let me go."

Paul smiled lightly. "Okay."