"Were you even thinking?" Arena pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed.

"You're right. I wasn't thinking." Kihyun had no shame whatsover. "I did it because I wanted you to be a part of the makeup team. I still do." He looked at her with a blank expression.

"So that's where you went yesterday?"

He nodded. Kihyun was wearing ripped jeans again with a white T-shirt.

"Are you mad at me?"

"What? No? I don't have the right to be mad at you. I just don't understand why." Arena looked at the ceiling and then at Kihyun, waiting for him to answer her burning question.

"Because," started Kihyun and gestured for Arena to sit onto one of the chairs that was in the room, she ignored his gesture and shifted her weight onto her right hip instead, "You're really talented. And I had so much fun with you yesterday. Plus thinking about leaving this place tomorrow and maybe never seeing you again.. "

Arena looked at Kihyun's eyes. She liked his eyes.

She sighed. "Why does it matter if you never see me again? You're famous. A phenomenon. A celebrity for goodness' sake. There are millions of girls out there. Millions and millions of girls, who would kill just to see you." Arena smiled at him sadly.

Kihyun shifted on his feet and stuffed his hands in his back pockets. He didn't show it but he was tired.

"Why? You don't. Even. Know. Me."

"That's why I'd like to have more time with you. Which means you coming with us."

"Did you think about what joining the makeup team would mean to me? I would have to leave everything behind. My life, friends, job, family, school," Arena counted on her fingers, "Everything. Plus I don't think my parents would ever allow something like this. I won't be able to quit my job this fast nor will I be able to pack everything up by tonight and mess with the school at the same time."

Kihyun looked like he just now started thinking about this. He bit his lip and took a step forward.

Arena took a step back. She shrugged. "You see? This isn't possible, I'm sorry. You have your idol life and I have mine. I've already had more time with you than I should've."

Kihyun clenched his hands into fists and held them at his side.

Maybe he was too used to getting his way all the time that someone pushing him away came as a surprise. Maybe he was too used to every girl wanting him and doing anything for him.

Arena wasn't like that.

That's what made her special.

Arena took another three steps back until she was practically standing in front of the door.

"Thank you for giving me a chance to hang out with you and have fun with you. It's an experience I will never forget." Arena turned to open the door and faced Kihyun one more time. She bowed her head and smiled a sad smile.

"I will go back to watching you from videos and listening to your songs and fangirling over Monsta X. Good luck in Atlanta tomorrow. You'll be amazing." Arena stepped out of the door backwards, not seeing Wonho, who had been lurking behind the door, listening. Wonho rushed out of Arena's way so she wouldn't stumble and fall. "Goodbye." Arena bowed again, turned around and walked away.

She headed straight for the elevators.

She didn't look back.

Kihyun was left standing in the doorway, speechless.

"I did not see that coming. Did she just walk away from you?" asked Wonho who had appeared at Kihyun's side at the doorway.

"Yup."

"Aren't you going to say goodbye?"

"No," Kihyun turned to face his friend, "Because I refuse to believe that this is goodbye." He looked at the closed elevator doors one more time, where Arena had just disappeared to.

"Come on, there are so many girls who'd love to just see you. If Arena isn't interested then let her go."

"It's not about that. She's different. She holds back. Hides thing inside of her."

"You have known the girl for 3 days."

They walked back into the room and Kihyun sat on his bed, his head in his hands. "I told you. She's different. I can see it."

***

Kihyun was right. Arena was different. In ways he couldn't even imagine. Arena had troubles and thoughts that no one knew about but herself.

Not even Naha.

That's because she didn't like sharing her struggles. So she went through everything alone. Every struggle. She didn't let anyone help her.

She had a closed personality.

It had been hard enough to let Naha in.

Naha didn't push Arena to talk about her struggles, and respected Arena's decision to keep them to herself. That was one of the reasons they were best friends in the first place.

***

Naha was waiting for her when she got back down to the lobby.

When Arena had gotten into the elevator she had had to hold herself back not to run out again. This was an opportunity of a lifetime. And she was going to let it go.

Arena stepped out of the elevator, her handbag hanging in her hand. She looked down and walked quietly to where Naha was waiting for her, over at the front entrance. Naha looked up from her phone and speed-walked to meet Arena halfway.

"Well?" Naha looped her arm through Arena's and the stepped out of the hotel.

"I need to call Mrs. Park to tell her my decision." Arena rubbed her forehead with her free hand and then laid her head on Naha's shoulder.

"You can tell me everything later. Right now, let me drive, you look tired." Naha smiled down at Arena and patted her hair.

"Ohhh I love you."

***

"He really said that?"

Arena and Naha were sitting in Naha's apartment, a place they wanted to come up to before but got held up by Arena's phone call.

They were sitting on the couch, wrapped in blankets. Arena always had a spare pair of sweatpants and a T-Shirt at Naha's. Just in case. Arena also had some of Naha's clothes in her drawers at home.

She was wearing her spare clothes now.

It was almost dark outside and they had the TV on, on a low volume. Naha had made some hot chocolate and put out a plate of cookies she made.

Arena started tying her hair up. "I can't believe I'm letting this go. But let's be real. It would be impossible. Where would I get a VISA that fast? Or deal with school? Or pack everything up? Or have my parents' permission. They would never allow this, I'm not even 18 yet."

Naha nodded and took a bite of a cookie that was on the table. "You're right. They are mental if they think you would actually manage to pull this off. No offence."

Arena finished with her hair and sipped her hot chocolate. She winced because she burned her tongue. "None taken."

They sat in silence for a while, except for the TV, which they could barely hear. The room was dark, not if you count a few twinkly lights underneath the ceiling.

Arena sighed, leaned back her head and pulled the blanket up to cover her right shoulder.

"Are you tired?" Naha looked over to Arena who was snuggling in the blanket, almost falling asleep. "Hey, hey, hey, ARENA!" Naha was snapping her fingers in front of her friend's closed eyes.

"Are you tired?" she asked again.

"Mmmmhh." Arena waved a hand not bothering to open her eyes.

"We have school tomorrow. It's Tuesday not Friday."

Arena jerked up, her bun flying open and hair falling down her shoulders.

"It's Wednesday tomorrow?" asked a sleepy Arena and scratched her head, swishing her hair out of her face.

"Yup." Naha got up from the couch and helped Arena up too. They started walking toward the front door.

"Crap, I have work." Arena sighed and pulled on her boots. Naha helped Arena into her coat and handed Arena her backpack.

She also wrapped Arena's scarf around her neck and lower face.

"Can you drive?" Naha crossed her arms and leaned against the wall on her left side.

Arena nodded and mumbled, "Thanks." Her voice was muffled because of the scarf.

She hugged Naha.

"Call me when you get home, okay?"

Arena did the okay sign with her fingers and waddled out of the front door like a sleepy penguin.

A sleepy, warmly dressed cute penguin.

She ended up getting home safely and forgetting to call Naha and do her homework.

She fell asleep instantly.

[To any wondering, Arena had called Mrs. Park when she was at Naha's. She had ended up refusing the offer.]

***

Arena felt completely and utterly numb on the next morning. Like a living dead.

She was a zombie.

Arena hated herself and everything else that she couldn't go with Monsta X. It was her dream to go and work and learn in South Korea, and she let it go. Arena couldn't even look at herself.

She spent the entire school day moping around until Naha came along and cheered her up. But only a little bit.

"Hey."

Arena's head snapped up and she turned to look at Naha who was sitting opposite her at the cafeteria.

It was lunch time.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

No, she wasn't.

"Really?"

"Yes, N, I'm fine." Arena plastered a fake ass smile onto her face.

Naha didn't fall for it.

"Arena, I know you, stop lying to my face."

Arena sighed and looked at the ceiling. She put down her fork which she had been eating her fruit salad with.

"Okay, maybe I'm not fine. It's just really really depressing to see my dreams fly away, just like woosh.." Arena picked up her fork again and flew it around in the air.

Naha eyed her friend suspiciously and raised her eyebrow.

Arena noticed Naha's look and folded her arms on the table. "Stop looking at me like that."

Naha shook her head and muttered, "Nevermind."

They finished their meals in silence, not counting the chatter and noise from others around them. Arena and Naha stood up from the seats and took away their platters.

***

Are had work today. She didn't want to go. Not at all. School had finished hours ago and Arena was sitting in the staff room at the back. Her shift started in 10 minutes.

"Ughhhh," groaned Arena and leaned her head back.

She walked out of the staff room, minutes before her shift.

"Want to start now?" Asked the current cashier who was working before Arena.

"Yeah, sure."

Arena stepped behind the counter herself and leaned against the wall.

She usually was happy and cheerful while working. For customers. So they'd get a good impression of Arena and that the gas station was a friendly environment.

Also Arena usually was happy and cheerful.

That wasn't the case today.

She felt empty inside.

One of Arena's biggest fear in life was not being able to do what she wanted to do. To let her dreams go.

But that's what she had done.

A customer had appeared in front of her.

"Excuse me?"

Arena stepped forward to beep through the customer's purchases.

7 sandwhiches and bottles of different fizzy drinks.

Arena looked up.

"Arena what's wrong?"

What.