Ch. 15

It had been three weeks since I last saw Julian and I missed him. As wrong as it was and as much as I tried to fight myself my feelings only intensified. I thought I was over him. I had seven years to heal, seven years to get over him, seven years to train my body to stop asking where he's been and all that went down the drain within 30 seconds of me seeing him. I was still trying to plot on how to get near him again. It's like as the days went on the hotter the fire I had inside of me for him grew and the more washed out the guilt I felt about the situation became. I had even been avoiding Rico. At first it was unintentional but I soon found myself looking for every reason not to be home. I started really throwing myself into work and my clients. Once news got out that I styled Julian I was getting booked left and right. I was even secretly hoping that Julian would find a way to book me again but that clearly was not happening. I spent much of the morning in bed before my stomach started talking to me. I then decided it was time to get up and stop moping around. I slowly pulled myself out of my sheets and dragged my legs down the stairs. Everything about this house was starting to make me uncomfortable. The fact that I shared this house with Rico and I was being deceitful was what was really getting to me. My foot touched the last step and I tried to make a uturn when I spotted Rico sitting on a stool at the kitchen island but it was too late he already noticed me. Upon spotting me his face lit up and I felt my frown form.

"Hey baby" he said while pulling me into a tight hug

"Hey" I replied weakly, barely returning his hug.

"So..."

"So what?"

"There's something I've been meaning to ask you"

I raised an eyebrow before saying " yeah what's that"

He didn't answer me right away and that made my palms start to sweat. Had he figured me out? Atlanta is big but circles were so small. Had someone seen Julian and I kiss and ran back and told Rico? A million scenarios went on in my head and for a second I started to psych myself out. That is until he said

" Go to New York with me"

No way Jose I thought to myself but I decided to phrase my decline a little better so I didn't hurt his feelings.

"Rico, no. I have so much going on here with work and customers I can't just leave like that"

"I know I know but you love New York I figured it would be a nice little get away.

"But I have to work." I protested.

Any other day I wouldn't have even let him finish his sentence. All I would've heard was New Y... and I would've jumped on the idea. New York was my favorite city in the worbld next to D.C. but I did not want to be trapped in another state in a hotel room with Rico.

He hopped off the stool and walked towards me and I subconsciously took a couple steps back. He scrunched his face out of confusion and I tried to pull it together before blowing my cover. He touched my face gently and I tilted my head towards his palm just to get it over with. I use to feel so much for him but now I just wasn't so sure.

"You deserve the break babe, you'll be able to shop and do some open mic nights and stuff, you know how writing and singing always calms you down"

"I Know but.."

"But nothing, you'll get to really pamper yourself while I'm with the team and then I'll take care of you once I come home"

"What did you just say?"

"When I come home I'll take care of you" He said with a sly smile

Eww I thought before rolling my eyes. I made a mental note to fake my period when we were in New York. He Thought I was interested in him but what caught my attention was that he said the team was going to New York as well. It would be the perfect way for me to get Julian alone so I could tell him about Janae.

"This is perfect" I whispered

"What did you say babe?"

"Oh Nothing" I Chuckled uncomfortably "I was just saying you're right I do deserve some time off, I Think the trip will be perfect. When do we leave?"

"We leave tonight, we'll be flying out with the team"

My face light up and a huge smile spread across my face.

"See I knew you would be excited about New York"

"Rico! you don't even know" I said honestly.

He didn't have to know exactly why I was excited.

"I'm going to go get packed"

I didn't even wait for him to respond, I ran 40 up the stairs, pulled my suitcase out of my closet and began tossing articles of clothing everywhere. It didn't take me long to finish packing and I soon found myself looking for things to do to killing time and my anxiety. I was dusting things that didn't need to be dusted, sweeping places I already swept, and wiping down my counters over and over again. I went through a whole bottle of lysol wipes before I realized what I was doing. Once I was done with my cleaning frenzy I looked at the clock and it was only a quarter past 3 and our flight didn't leave out until 11pm. The team preferred to travel late to avoid traffic and fan sightings. Really a bunch of hooplah if you asked me, I sighed deeply out of pure frustration and decided it would be best if I took a Benadryl to help me fall asleep and nap that hours that stood in between me and Julian away.

After what I presumed to be a few hours I felt Rico nudge my shoulder and tell me it was time to head to the airport. A small smile formed on my lips but I quickly tried to mask my excitement. Once all out bags were loaded up and the house was locked down we headed over to the airport. The entire ride was pretty quiet. Rico and I spoke here and there but majority of the time only the sounds of the radio filled the empty space in the car. My eyes were glued to the window almost like I was in a scene for an R&B video from the 90s. After about 30 minutes we arrived at the private entrance and boarded the plane soon after. I tried to look around for Julian without blowing my cover but I couldn't catch sight of him. I needed to get up and walk to the back to see if I saw him because if he wasn't playing this game and wasn't on this flight this whole trip would've been in vain.

"Rico baby where's the bathroom" I said in my most innocent voice possible.

He smiled before saying "It's in the back through the curtains"

"Ok" I responded sweetly.

I quickly turned on my heels while Rico said "hurry back"

Yuck, I thought before continuing on in my pursuit. I pushed through the curtains and casually skimmed through the rows of seats. Everyone was laughing and joking or talking about their plans for New York but still no Julian. Defeated I slid the bathroom door to side, turned the knob so that it showed occupied and dropped myself on top of the toilet seat. I had been acting on faith hoping that fate would be kind but I had come up short and was not stuck on a trip with a man I didn't really love. The more I thought about my situation the more I started to get depressed. I sulked for a few more minutes before getting up and looking at myself in the mirror.

"What are you doing to me Julian" I whispered to myself. I shook it off and put on my best poker face before sliding the bathroom door open and stepping out. As I headed back to my seat I heard Rico's powerful laugh and another person say "Man y'all know Jay is always late aint nothing new"

There was no way I thought. I put some pep in my step and there he was laughing and joking with them. My physical appearance may have come off as calm and unbothered but my insides were screaming. He had on a black vneck that exposed a small portion of a tattoo on his chest, thats new I thought to myself. I couldn't help but imagine me tracing over every line with my fingertips as we laid next to each other in bed. I continued to scope his outfit out from his greay sweats and his nike slides. He was so simple but so cute. His hair was freshly cut, waves in full view and his beard, man that beard. I made a mental note to thank his barber once we got all the minor kinks worked out in our not quite there yet relationship. As I took my seat Julian stopped talking to his teammate that was sitting next to him and he looked directly into my eyes. He licked his lips and gave my a half smile that exposed his perfect white teeth all while never breaking his gaze. His teammate cleared his throat and brought us back down to reality. I took my seat next to Rico and snuck peaks out the side of my eye of Julian as much as I could. He would catch me and I would turn to look away but couldn't keep my eyes off him. This went on for the first hour of our flight before I fell asleep.

I was awakened after some time by two flight attendants coming around to take our drink orders. "Hi I'm Elza" "and I'm Trecia, we'll be your attendants for the duration of your flight can we get you anything to drink?"

"Gingerale" Julian answered for me.

Elza, Trecia, and Rico turned to look at him with confused looks on all of there faces.

I couldn't believe that he remembered how much I loved gingerale.

Julian caught that he answered out loud and said " I mean, I want gingerale"

"Ok we'll be with you shortly sit" Elza said

"Ma'am?" Trecia questioned. Still waiting on my drink order

"I'll have a cranberry juice" I side eyeing Julian

I really wanted a gingerale but he just had to go and blow our cover.

Our flight was over not too long after that and once we landed everybody applauded before rushing to the door to get out of the plane and stretch their legs off. Doesn't always pay to be tall I chuckled to myself.

Rico was off using the rest room while I waited in baggage claim to retrieve all my luggage. I felt like I watched the conveyor belt go around and around and I was still unable to locate my bags. I was beginning to get frustrated and started to get up and look for an attendant to help me before I saw Julian slyly headed in my direction.

"Nice save back there" He said

"Yeah no problem, it was an easy guess anyways" I said nonchalantly

"Nah Ma, I know you. Don't ever down play that" he chuckled

I rolled my eyes, playing hard to get

"You knew me, like I said before"

He tugged on his beard clearly amused that I wasn't making this easy for him.

"So let me get to know the new Heaven Cassanova"

I pretended to think it over before saying

"Nope, I Have a boyfriend"

"Can't tell by how you kept sneaking looks at a nigga"

"How would you know I was looking at you if you we're looking at me?" I questioned.

He smiled before yanking my bag off the conveyor belt and sitting it down by my feet. He stepped closer to me and said

"Let the games begin baby" before leaving a kiss on neck and walking away. I was so stunned and not 1 minute after that Rico walked out and asked If I was all set and ready to go.

Julian's words played over and over in my head. Let the games begin? Oh, I was ready for war.