I'm

At some point we will have to choose: to stand in or get out and sailstorm

After all 'the best view comes after the climb

Day💖

***********************

My eyes refuse

to watch you leave,

so tears will blur,

the memory

"Anuradha Prathap"

Any other sane wife, may not have a good impression hearing her husband saying another woman's name sitting in front of such a beautiful view.

But I knew it was something more and the name, it sounded familiar.

Wait.... Is he talking about

'THE ANURADHA PRATHAP"???

I hummed to let him continue becoming impatient and curious because the last thing I expect from my husband is to talk about my Role model.

"You may or may not know her"

He started searching my face for any sense of realisation.

I cut him off

"I know, I mean I have read about her."

A melancholic atmosphere wrapped itself around us, as if the breeze threading around us holding a story untold, full of secrets, mystific.

He took a long breath as if finding it really hard to speak. I myself felt restless, but more than that I felt sad I don't know why maybe seeing the pain dancing in his eyes, a sense of uneasiness marring his features.

He continued his voice devoid of any emotions, so much leveled

"Everyone knew her to be a lady who broke the norms of the society, a great visionary, a strong woman. Everyone considered her as the Queen of the Business world. The perfectionist."

Abhimanyu smiled as if reviving a beautiful memory, his face reflecting proudness.

"But even the sturdiest falls one day. For a lady who was always ten steps ahead of the game, the fall hit her hard. But that was not the problem she got a reminder of her mistake, a bastard child."

I felt breath stop, I felt tears streaming down my cheeks hearing the emotions in his voice, feeling his pain, a certain unworthiness of himself projecting in his voice.

He was really breaking down for a man who was always calm and collected. But I won't stop him. I knew he wanted someone to be there for him to hear him. A support.

I brought my hand around him spreading the warmth and support in me to him. To let him know I was there beside him, with him, its okay to show me the real Abhimanyu Shekhawat.

"But Adi even after all that she didn't fall, everyone thought it was the downfall of the Queen but alas! When a Phoenix burns it's not it's end but She rose again but this time not just as a businesswoman but as a Mother. She showed the world she doesn't need a man.

But Adi I knew... I... knew in the middle of the night when darkness consumed everything, the times when she pressed me towards her chest it was not to give me solace but for herself to give strength to stand another day.

I saw the helplessness when she saw my longing gazes when Ajay uncle carried Ananya or her longing gaze when Ajay uncle holded her little sister's hand when she felt weak. I saw it all not that she wanted to show me but I saw it"

By now he was not holding back his tears he left them to fall down. I pulled him closer to me trying my best to relive his pain but somewhere I too knew I needed him because somehow unintentionally it's hurting me, quenching my heart seeing the strong and composed man falling apart right in front of my eyes.

"But again fate didn't leave us, when I was 17 she met with an accident. I still remember her blue eyes looking at me with guilt, maybe for not keeping her promise as a Mother to look after me or not telling me who was my bloody sperm donor.

She once told me 'Action always proves words means nothing' so from a small age I have always believed in actions. Everyone thought I went to the USA for a lavish lifestyle even I told myself that is the reason. But I wanted to be away and built myself. But after 8 years coming back to India The last thing I expected was to come face to face with the same intensity, same blazing of dreams, aspirations and passion again." Saying that he looked at me as if implying something. I was stunned, what did he mean?

Seeing my confusion he let out a humorless laugh.

"On our first night you told it was blazing anger for me that I saw.

No it was blazing of the same passion which I saw in my Mother. Yes Adi I saw you in the interview. But I found something else too the same loneliness, same sense of defeat which I saw in my Mother. I found a part of my Mother in you. A part longing for support, strength at the weak point. Someone to embrace you at that moment."

A pregnant silence engulfed us. All the pieces were slowly falling in place.

"I felt the need to protect you I felt I should be with you to be your strength which I couldn't do for my Mom. But more than you I knew deep down I need you more than you need me. I wanted to feel the same feeling when you are with me not just because you are like my Mother but you are you. The lady whose eyes sparkle with confidence, the lady who knows her worth, the lady who knows nothing is imposible for her. I don't want to lose such a Gem. If I did I would be the most foolish man in this world."

"Thinking this I planned all these. Because I couldn't stop myself. And I wanted to make you mine before someone else realize your worth and gets you before me. But in between I forgot you will be hurt. And as the quote goes 'Careful when you play the cards when you have a Queen in your hand.' I forgot you are not ready, but trust me I don't regret it because atleast you are mine and I'm yours in official records." He said while looking at me after a pause he added

"But now I'm admitting my mistakes."

I was hysterical, I was crying a river by now. I knew where this was going, I don't want that. But doesn't he know I want him now, with me. That I am starting to lo..

"I want to treat you better than anyone ever has. I want to be the reason why you glow when you smile.

I want be all that you need.

So I'm letting you go not because I don't want you but I value your happiness more than mine. But don't forget I'm always with you and waiting for you."

He slowly leaned away from me.

And it hurt. God it really hurts.

"I'll leave India tomorrow the next flight after Mama and Dad leaves.

I'm giving the reigns back to you. It's you who have to lead your life.

Chase your dreams and as you put it Become my equal. But trust me if someone who is undeserving in this relationship then it's me. I'm letting you go in the hope you come back to me. But again let me make this clear, for me it will be always you. I'll be waiting for you my Queen."

Is this not what I craved for? The freedom?

Then why am I feeling like dying??

Why does it hurt this much??

I want him back.

When I looked up again I saw Roger standing near the car.

He left.