I lay there in the bed with Will, my head resting on his chest. I could feel his heart beating inside his chest. It calmed me. "I love you." He said into the silence. Tears welled up in my eyes. "I slept with my friends husband." I said. I took a deep breath. I finally said it. I said it out loud to someone other than Chelsea. He took a deep breath. "I love you too, but I need you to know that I'm not some Saint. I come with baggage..." I said after he didn't say anything. "Okay." Was all he said. We stayed there in silence for a while. "What are you thinking?" I asked after he didn't say anything for a while. "I'm thinking about you." He answered. "I still love you Jayla." He added answering my unasked question. I let out a deep breath. He still loves me. I said to myself over and over. He's perfect. "Thank you." I said. "For what?" He asked. "For loving me. For not getting up and walking out as soon as I said it." I said. "I'm not going anywhere." He said playing with the ends of my hair. "Good." I answered running my hand along his chest. "We have class in an hour." He said with a sigh. I groaned. I reluctantly sat up and stretched. We quickly changed clothes and headed to the university.

*********

I walked out of the classroom and my phone buzzed. Ben texted.

Ben: Can I see you? We need to talk. I quickly replied.

Me: Where do you want to meet?

Ben: Come by the house. Lexie is at work until 7 tonight. I didn't reply. I went and found Will. "Hey can you drop me by my house? I need to get my car one of my friends wants me to go meet them and give me something." I said. "I can just go with you. I don't have to work tonight." I shook my head. "No!" I said all too quickly. "er..I mean I think I need to go by myself. They're very shy and I'm not ready to introduce you to them yet." I said trying to cover it. He gave a slight nod and took my hand but I could tell he didn't believe me. He dropped me off at my house and I got in my car and headed towards Ben's. I pulled up and reluctantly walked towards the door. I gave a gentle knock and about 30 seconds later he came to the door. He smiled when he saw me. "Hey." He greeted. "Hey." I answered back quietly. Once the door was shut he came forward and he planted his lips on mine. After a few seconds I placed my hand on his chest and gently pushed making him break the kiss and back up a few inches.

"We can't Ben..." He placed his fingers under my chin and made me look up at him. "We could Jay. If you wanted to we could." I shook my head tears coming to my eyes. "You know it's not that simple. It's not about whether I want you or not, because you know that's not the issue..." He tried to come towards me, but I shook my head tears forming in my eyes. "Ben I have a boyfriend." I said choking back tears. He looked at me seriously. "I'm saying you can have a husband. Jay I'll leave her. I'll leave her right now and we'll go. We'll go wherever you want." He said grabbing my hand. "Just say the word and we'll go. I love you." I reluctantly took my hand out of his. "I...we can't. Ben we can't do this to her. I can't do this to Will." I said starting to cry. I took a step towards him and placed my hands on both of his cheeks. I planted a gentle kiss on his lips. "I love you, and I always will." I whispered through tears. He planted another kiss on my lips. When he pulled away we both knew it was the end. We were done. I wiped the tears off of my cheeks before walking out.