《FROM NEVER TO HAPPILY EVER!》13.
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Hooriya.
One month later.
Patience. I have always heard people saying patience is a virtue. It is only now that I grasp the meaning of the phrase. After experimenting that in my own life, I can confidently state patience is a trait worth possessing. Had I not been patient, I think we wouldn't be here. Asad and me, I mean.
The ups and the downs, the lows and the highs, the odds and the evens that writers always talk about poetically, I now deduce can only be dealt with if one has enough endurance and patience within him. The last month has been stable in my otherwise rollercoaster of a married life. Things are peaceful. All of us have come to a common ground to live without conflict.
The day my parents went back to Sarjung, Asad's plaster was removed and a week's therapy in, he was as good as normal. Two weeks ago, he resumed work and began going to his office. Now, we have all set into a routine where Asad goes to office by ten in the morning, I give Abbaji his tablets and spend time with him on evenings. The better part of my day is spent taking care of the Khan haveli.
'Life is good, Alhamdulillah', I think as I now sit with Saroj chachi on the terrace. Cool breeze hits my face, my hair dancing to it's rhythm. Chachi is opening up about her tragic past where she was married at 18 and a widow at 19.
"To phir aapne, dubara shaadi kyun nai ki? " The one question I have been asking her for days and she wouldn't answer me. But I can see past her act, I have often seen the longing look in her eyes when Abbaji is around.
Even now, she does a good job at hiding her emotions.
"Main dukh mein thi jab tumhari saas chal basi. Aur jab maine Asad ko tuthte dekha, apne aap se wada kiya tha ki kabhi use aur Fahad ko maa ki kami mehsoos na hone doongi. Meri ammi aur unki ammi, sab ne khan parivaar ki seva ki thi. Mein bas us parampara ko age nai badha pai, mera to koi bacha nahin hai. Bus aise hi, zindagi kat gai", she muses with tears in her eyes. My eyes fill up too, at the dedication this woman has bestowed upon the Khans.
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"Aur phir Abbaji ne bhi to doosri shadi nahin ki. Pata nai kyun?", I provoke trying to see if my theory was right. And her eyes reflect stars at the mention of Abbaji. She gulps, looking down at her hands.
"Main nahin jaanti, ke unhone dubara rishta kyun nahin joda." Although she tries saying it firmly, but I can make out the lie. There is more to their story, something that they have kept hidden. I don't push her more, she is already too emotional. I promise myself to ask Asad if we could have another marriage in the haveli, this woman deserves it after what she has done for them.
Speaking of whom, Asad as it turns out, is a workaholic. Ever since he rejoined office, we haven't spent any time together. He comes home extremely late at night, I don't even realise when. The mornings, I am busy with work and he is sleeping. I need to make sure we spend some time together after he is back today.
"Chachi, chaliye na. Khane ka wakt hogaya hai" I say getting up from the floor dusting my Kurta. She nods and we go down together.
After dinner is served, Abbaji joins on the table. His eyes looking for something, or rather someone. It can't be Asad because he knows he is at office. I smirk, mischief in my eyes.
"Kya dhund rahe hain Abbaji? Koch chahiye aapko?" I ask innocently.
He is startled first but then composes himself quickly racking his brain for an excuse.
"Wo, beta mera suit istari karwane Saroj ko diya tha. Kahan hai waise Saroj?" Not so fast Abbaji.
I shrug, "Aaj haveli mein nai hain wo, maine suna unka koi purana dost hai jisse milne gai hain. Keh rahi thi bachpan ka dost hai. Bohot khaas hoga, tabhi to itne mahinon mein pehli baar chutti lete dekha unko" Wow Hooriya. Didn't know you could lie so well.
The colour drains from his face, his face hardens. He clenched his jaw, as if he would explode any moment. I want to laugh so loudly at his cute expressions. How jealous. Like father, like son.
"Mujhe to nai pucha usne chutti ke liye. Aise kaise chali gayi." He frowns more as if the possibility of her meeting a man is horrendous. Well, if you weren't this slow in realising Abbaji, maybe she wouldn't
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just be a caretaker.
I actually asked her to take rest in servants quarters. Just then the bell rings, and Asad comes in a minute later.
He looks so tired. His face is blank as usual, he settled down on the table after greeting his father. He must be hungry, I dish out the food on his plate, standing beside him. He doesn't look up at me, just begins eating quietly. I sit beside him, taking tortilla in my plate.
"Dad, I have to tell you about something."
Even though Abbaji is slightly distracted, he still nods. Focussing completely on his son, who will always be his first priority.
"Yes beta. Tell me, the work is going smoothly right?" Asad just nods settling his spoon on the table.
"Dad, I wish to take a second wife"
I choked on my food, coughing the next moment he uttered the words. I must have lost my hearing sensation.
Because I heard him saying he wants a second wife. But soon the realisation begins settling within me.
He doesn't even turn to see if I am OK, he keeps looking at his father who has a baffled look on his face.
There is absolute silence in the room, but a tsunami brewing in my chest.
What. The. Fuck?
I stare at him, my piercing gaze focussed just on him to elaborate. Maybe I am waiting for him to say he was joking. The least he could do is elaborate. But he doesn't, he sits there stoically as if he has all the time in the world. Least bothered about the chaos he is causing within me.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Abbaji roars, his eyes spitting fire. If it would be anyone else in his son's place, he would have cowered away in fear. But this is Asad Raheem Khan we are talking about.
He doesn't even flinch, taking a breath before saying, "I wish to take a second wife. Is that hard to understand? I don't think Hooriya is the one for me, so I took the liberty to choose a girl for myself. Do you remember Sabrina, my college friend? I like her." This is probably the first time he has spoken so much and for what? To announce about his romantic interest in some other girl with his wife and father before him.
I feel nauseous. So I rush to my room, the old one to empty my stomach. I can hear crashing sounds from the dining room, and loud shouts ringing but I can't focus clearly on anything. My vision is blurry, my head has begun throbbing after I threw up. I clutch my head in my hands, sliding on the floor of the bathroom, I can't even breathe properly. What's happening to me?
After a few seconds, my breathing gets normal. I slump against the tiles, flashes of our time together playing before my eyes like a fucking movie. I recollect every moment, we spent together. I never really gave much thought about why we hadn't consummated even after four months into the marriage.
I thought it was because he needed time to cope up with the changes. Our relationship is building slowly, so maybe it would take longer than normal couples. But I was a fool all along, wasn't I?
He was never into me. Then what about all those mushy moments we spent together? I never felt like it was only lust. It had felt like our souls connected. But guess it was all my imagination.
How foolish I was to think life would go easy on me. It was not the aftermath of struggle. It was just the calm before the storm.
A sob rips out of my vocals when I realize it was all his pretence. He never liked me, much less love. I was the fool. How could I think he would ever consider me worthy of him. How could I do the mistake of falling in love with him.
I breakdown, my tears flowing like Niagara. I hit the walls trying to channel the pain to my body rather than heart. Nothing helps, the pain in my heart only intensifies.
Aapne to sab tabaah kardiya Asad ji. Aapse ishq karne ki itni badi saza dedi.
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