《Without The Words (Student/Teacher)》Chapter 36
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What is love?
I could ask myself that a thousand times, and yet, here I was, letting myself fall apart in his muscular arms.
Would we go through with it- have sex, I mean? Was this the real deal?
I wanted to feel myself sinking into his magnetizing presence, but I couldn't help but let my mind flutter to the topic that this was sex.
I'm a virgin.
I mouthed the words over his shoulder as his lips sucked on the warm flesh of my neck.
My heart began to rapidly pulse in my chest. I'm a virgin. Shit. My father is in the next room and I'm a virgin and I can't even get the words out of my damn mouth-
"Poppy." His lips must have left my skin, but I was so petrified that I couldn't process what was happening.
"Speak," he whispered. His fingers connected with my hips, and in a swift movement he brought me up from the ground to the granite counter in the powder room.
"I-I'm a v-virgin."
Mr. Lee stopped dead in his tracks, and he looked up at me with sadness morphing into his beautiful eyes.
"I would never take advantage of you like this. Now, here, with parents and everybody else in the next room. This was silly of me to do in the first place. I care about you, Poppy."
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"You don't need to be sorry, stop it." He gently placed his hand on mine. "You are wonderful. I want you, but I respect you and your body."
Our moment didn't last long. A woman, who I thought was a parent, although I couldn't exactly make out who, opened the door, walked in and everything about those ten seconds dragged in an agonizingly slow motion.
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In the most simplest terms, we were done. I knew it and he knew it right then and there. The look of disgust in her facial features- she knew who we were and what was happening.
This was illegal. We were breaking the law, and our relationship began to fall through my fingers like sand.
When something bad happens, you can feel it in the air. The thick blanket of fear covering you, your heart beat sounding so loud that it could vibrate against your ribcage.
I was out of words, which actually sounds quite ironic considering the fact that without Mr. Lee, I am without any words, just a hollow girl with the past etched into her mind like the back of her hand.
What made me think him and I would even get the opportunity to have sex? Every single time, a conflict presented itself beneath the surface. I couldn't name a time where we could even do something as simple as kissing without worrying about who could see.
The lady glanced back and fourth between Mr. Lee and I. While Mr. Lee was straightening his tie, I was looking down at my shoes, and the silence began to thicken as the clock ticked away.
"What have you done?" The woman muttered to Mr. Lee. Abruptly and completely unexpectedly, the blond woman grabbed my arm and tugged me towards her. "I am speaking to the principal about this. Taking advantage of a young girl, what kind of sick pervert are you?"
Him? A pervert? Is that a joke? Anger instantly boiled deep within me "H-he's not a pervert. I wanted to have sex with him, let me go!" I violently tugged my arm out of her firm grasp.
"You're brainwashed, honey. This is illegal and you are crazy if you think I'm going to be a bystander to this crime. Poppy, you are a victim."
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With that, she left the room, and I stared at the cherry wood door for another three minutes until Mr. Lee spoke.
"She's right."
I whipped my head around, using my arm to wipe a pathetic tear from my cheek. Mr. Lee moved closer to me. He raised his arm and when his thumb touched the area below my eye, where my tear crashed into his finger, the beauty of his touch sent my sanity out the door.
The tears couldn't stop flooding, and I eventually moved into him and pressed my cheek against his chest while I sobbed my obscure sorrows.
His hand moved back and fourth against my scalp, his fingertips lightly pressing against my head.
"She's not right. S-she d-doesn't understand," I whispered in between my sobs. Sniffling, I said, "I can't lose you, too."
"We can't be together." He moved away and looked down at me, bringing his hand up to my cheek and stroking it so romantically, so beautifully sweet and angelic that I wanted to burst into tears again.
"It's not fair." I muttered, my heart sinking further with every breath I took.
"I know," he murmured. For the first time, I heard emotion in his voice. It was clear as day - the waver in his deep tone was enough proof.
"I took advantage of the opportunity to be in charge of you. I hold authority of you and I abused that. Whatever happens, you must stay strong and-"
"No!" I screeched. "Don't say that to me! Nothing will happen!"
The tears were pooling out of my eyes so fast that my vision began to grow blurry. I felt a shiver wrack through my body. Letting my legs give out, I dropped my knees to the floor and put my head in my hands, letting my sobs fill the silence in the tension-filled room.
"I think I'm going to turn myself in. It's already too late, but I might as well surrender now," Mr. Lee said quietly. He shoved a hand through his curly hair, gazing steadily at the floor.
"Then we'll do it together," I whispered, looking up at him. "We'll go down together. That's how it's supposed to be. We both broke the law."
Mr. Lee held his hand out to me. With a shaking palm, I pressed mine into his and rose back on my two feet.
Taking a long and deep breath, hand in hand, we both started for the door.
"One last time," I interrupted, abruptly stopping. I turned to him. "Please."
And he looked at me, his blue eyes blazing, and his lips molded into mine. My skin burned and my heart raced, and as we mixed our emotions into an electrifying kiss, with tears pouring down my cheeks and my eyeliner smearing, I could honestly say that no matter what happens, I still don't regret anything, and I was sure he didn't either.
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