《Hiraeth | Regulus Black》Chapter Ninety Eight
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Piper.... I, Sorry... Um.... Excuse me.
Piper and I... We actually fell out not so long ago. I suppose I thought I could tell her what to do and, well, anyone who knows Piper can tell you that's never possible.
I, erm, I suppose I'll always be haunted by my last words to her. We did fall out sometimes... Well, I fall out with everyone sometimes.
I just wanted to... To protect her.
I met Piper in... At the start of my fifth year at Hogwarts. Actually, it was the first night back. I was being quite rude to this boy, though I still think he deserved it, anyway, and then I grew awfully annoyed when he wouldn't pass me a plate of food I'd asked for.
I had only met Piper a few moments before, and in my mind I'd written her off as just some dumb teenage girl. However, Piper loved to prove me wrong.
She plastered on her smile and flicked her blonde hair about and persuaded the boy to hand me the food.
I know it's not much.
There's perhaps a lot of memories of Piper that I've forgotten over the years but that one is as clear in my mind as if it happened only a few minutes ago.
Piper wouldn't just ignore me when I was being annoying, or tell me to calm down when I was angry... She taught me to be a nicer, better person, though sometimes I do still throw that out of the window.
Piper and I were an unusual pair, to say the least. But it worked. She was the best friend to anyone who needed to be shown kindness. Piper i-wasn't just someone to lean on for support... She was somebody who would teach you to be better, teach you to stand on your own two feet as a better human than you had been before.
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These days I find myself doing a lot more supposing than perhaps I had done before. I suppose that's because I'm trying to understand the actions of those who's minds I can't read.
It was always easy to anticipate when Piper wanted something. She would bat her eyelashes, smile sweetly, and keep touching your arm.
It drove me so mad I usually just gave in to whatever she wanted to shake her off me.
One thing I never anticipated, probably because I never dreamt that someone would want to, was that Piper would... Well you all know; that's why we're here.
That's really why I find myself supposing things these days, rather than being as surefire as I used to be.
I... I want to know why she did it. I want to understand what Piper was thinking.
For some people, I imagine in those dangerous situations your adrenaline kicks in and you act on pure, basic instinct.
I'm not sure Piper was capable of that. She was... She was too smart. Piper never did anything without thinking it through, without knowing it was the best she could do.
I suppose, really, that's why I'm not mad at her.
Who could be? Because I know she would have thought it through, done it with purpose, and do the best she could. With one of her cheeky grins and a giggle, you'd forget you were ever even angry with Piper.
Piper was always the light of every room she was in. She was the kind of person who... If you were in a room of hundreds, all talking over each other so you couldn't hear a word, if you looked over at Piper you'd know she was listening to you - hung on your every word.
Piper wasn't just one of my best friends, she was my family.
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What I'm certain of, without a doubt in my mind or a hint of hesitation, is that Piper is one of my best friends and forever a part of me.
I wouldn't be here without her, in a million different ways. Not only do I owe my life to Piper Horix, I owe her my soul.
Without her in my corner, I would have given up long ago.
Piper had the hardest job of all, and she completed it with such care and ease... Piper redeemed me, not only in everyone else's eyes, but in my own too.
I'm now more comfortable at the prospect of moving onto the next stage, of stepping through the doorway to the other side of death.
For I know Piper will be there, waiting, smiling. She'll have found us the best seats to watch the world spin by, she'll have gathered up the best gossip she could find, and one of her terrible jokes will wash away all of the pain.
For all of us who knew Piper, we will forever be grateful that someone as good as her ever gave us the time of day.
I actually have a poem... Well, not really. Regulus read it to me, and he's paraphrased it because I complained about how long it was.
Truthfully, I'm not really one for poetry but Piper enjoyed it, and she always thought Regulus had great taste so... To Piper...
When great souls die,
our memory, suddenly sharpened,
examines,
gnaws on kind words
unsaid,
promised walks
never taken
Great souls die and
our reality takes leave of us.
Our souls now shrink.
Our minds, informed
by their radiance,
fall away.
And when great souls die,
ours senses, restored, never
to be the same, whisper to us.
They existed.
We can be better, for they existed.
Piper's memory will always live on as long as we always try to be better, because she really was the greatest of all of us.
Esme slowly tucked the sheets of parchment with her notes on into her pocket as she stepped down of the podium and resumed her seat between Regulus and Dirk.
She held hands with both of the boys, and on the other side of Dirk sat Levi.
Nobody else in that room had known Piper like they had, and nobody was as heartbroken as they were - clinging to each other for support.
"You did good." Regulus whispered into her ear as he gripped her hand, "Really good."
"Thank you." She quietly replied.
Dirk smiled over at her and put his hand on her knee, "Piper would be really impressed."
The last thing Esme had said to Piper was that she didn't need here.
That couldn't have been further from the truth.
Esme needed Piper.
And it was too late.
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Dear Namjoon,I know you won't read these, but by the time you find them I'll be dead. - jh tw; suicide, suicidal thoughts, abuse, abusive relationships, main character death (if there's anymore please tell me!!)© cherryjoonseok 2016
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