."Better lock it in your pocket, taking this one to the grave."

My dearest Camille,

My semester at Brogan's will be coming to an end, at the end of the spring semester. I hear you return home in a year, as well, which just so you know, makes my heart feel whole again. I cannot wait to see you, my love. You're coming out party, will be the event of the year. I just know it. (Because of your mother, and because you will be gorgeous.) And things will work out I promise. I will marry you and we will be together, and we will see the world together, I promise.

With love,

Lucas Madison

As I folded the letter up, I felt an emotion of both happiness and sadness, knowing that it had been a year since I had received any letters from Lucas, and that I was returning home now, without knowing what to expect. I put the folded letter with the others I had kept, and shut my trunk.

"Curtis, my trunk is ready." My mother, didn't even come, she sent Curtis, and I felt another wave of sadness fall over me.

"Coming, Miss. Say your goodbyes and I will come get you when it is time to go." I watched him walk outside and I turned grabbing my coat and gloves,

"Goodbye, Cami." I turned and saw Isabella, a girl I had claimed as my best friend, these last seven years, she was from Spain, and her Spanish features always made my jealous. Her tan skin, with long black hair that fell to her waist, and dark green eyes.

"Goodbye, Bella; I will see you at my party, right?"

"Of course," we embraced and Curtis walked up.

"Time to leave, Miss. Brexton." He smiled and nodded to Bella.

"Coming." I waved goodbye to Isabella, then stepped into the carriage.

The carriage ride took longer than I thought it would, and the cold didn't seem to help at all. I was cold, and my blanket that Curtis had given me, didn't keep the nip of the cold away. My nose felt as if something was biting at it, and I could see my air as I breathed out. I watched as the stars went by us, and I felt my heart skip a beat when I saw my home, behind the trees and undergrowth.

"We're home, Miss." Curtis opened the door, and helped me down.

"Camille." My mother's voice rang in my ears, "Welcome home, darling!" She rushed toward me, and hugged me tightly, this wasn't the woman I remembered.

"It is nice to be home, mother. I have missed it." I wrapped my arms around her waist, in taking her scent. Cigars, most likely my grandfathers, scotch, and roses.

"7 years, was too long. I am sorry for the rare visits, but when grandpa came here to live, and the business has been quite busy, I just had no time to get there. But boarding school has done well for you, kitten." She brushed my hair from my eyes holding me at arms length, "now come, you must be starving and exhausted."

I just realized how hungry I just was and I nodded up at her, "I am, quite a bit, actually mother."

"Come on, Nani, has made you some soup, your favorite chicken noodle." She took my hand kissing it softly.

"Alright mother." She led me into the house and Nani met us, taking my gloves, hat, and coat. She came back and went into the kitchen.

"While she gets that read, let us sit and talk about your party." She walked to the sitting room. I saw in the arm chair, straightening my dress. Nani brought me my soup, and I listened to my mother, talk about the food, guests, and my dress. I couldn't hear her, I just sat quietly and ate my soup, and focused on my father's chair. I realized the gaping hole that had been in my chest that I had been avoiding for 7 years.

After I finished eating, Nani followed me to my room, and helped me get ready for bed. I let my hair down, feeling it land against my back.

"Thank you, Nani." I laid down on my bed.

"Of course, it's nice to have you home," She blew out the candle, and I fell asleep, into a pure blackness.

When I woke up the next morning, it was to Nani, she was already moving, grabbing a lovely day dress out of my closet, and a petticoat to slip on me. "Oh did I wake you?" She lowered her head.

"No, of course not, just use to being up at this time." I smiled softly at her. Swinging my legs over the bed, feeling the cold hard wood.

"Well, since I am here, would you like to get ready?" I nodded, and sat on the stool to my vanity. She brushed softly through my hair, then quickly moved her fingers through it, braiding it down my back. "Is this dress ok?" The dress was pale pink, with lace accents, and something I hadn't had to wear in sometime. And something I didn't even recognize as mine.

"Yes, Nani." She lifted it over my head, and slipped my petticoat underneath my dress.

"Breakfast will be served soon." She disappeared out the door. I looked around my room, the first time since I had gotten home, last night. My mother had redecorated. She had a new set of brushes laid out on a brand new oak vanity for me. My closet, had brand new dress, and my desk was filled with new equipment. I shook my head, wondering why she went through all the trouble. I saw that Curtis had brought me my trunk, and I kneeled down opening it. It was filled with cloaks, my uniform, my dresses, letters, and my father's things I had taken with me. I played with the small wooden box, Aiden had bought me, that contained letters that I had reread time and time again. I sat it on my desk and left it there.

I stepped into the hallway, and there it was, like a huge knife in my chest, my father's library. I took a deep breath having a mental battle with whether I should go inside or not. I gave into my heart, and opened the big oak door. It was just like the last day I was in there. I had destroyed it, I took books throwing them on the floor, crying and screaming at the empty chair. Till Aiden had to come in and carry me out, sobbing. I bent down, picking up a book. I blew the dust off, and I saw it was my book of fairy-tales. I held it tight to my chest, feeling a deep sense of home and love. I need to clean this place up... no one else will touch it. I knelt down, gathering a stack of books, and started dusting them off, sliding them on the shelf, where I suddenly remembered where they needed to be at. I walked over to the window, throwing the curtains open. The sun poured in, and I looked around, watching the dust particles dancing around in the air.

I walked over and picked up the fairy tale book again, I opened it, and noticed my father's handwriting.

To my dearest Princess;

Read these stories when you're sad, or when you need to escape. These will bring you into a new world. And just let your imagination sore. Remember what I taught you. And always think of me, when you read these.

I will love you always

Your father.

My eyes began to burn, and I felt tears forming in my eyes. I closed the book.

"Miss?" I whipped my head around and saw Anne.

"Oh hello, Anne." I stood up and smiled laying the book on my father's desk. "Breakfast?"

"Yes." She left the room in a hurry, and headed down the stairs. I knew she was running to my mother. I followed closely behind her, my mom and grandfather were already sitting at the table.

"Good morning Kitten." My mother, smiled at me.

"Good morning." I sat beside her, taking a big spoonful of the porridge.

"Anne said you were in the library," My mother looked at me, whipping her mouth with a napkin.

"I went in there, and started cleaning." I looked at my food, "Then opened up the curtains."

"Well, that's good, I guess." She took a sip of tea, and took a deep breath. "We have your dress fitting, and tea at the Madison's today."

I chocked on my spoonful of porridge, and grabbed a napkin. "The Madison's?" That was Lucas's family.

"Yes, Elizabeth and Rose invited us for tea, to talk about your boarding school experience." She smiled, "Mr. Madison is out on the trade ship and Lucas is in Paris."

All I could bring myself to do was nod. I took a sip of the milk in front of me. "We will go, as soon as you're done playing with your food." She stood up, telling Anne to fetch our coats.

I put my spoon down and looked at my mother, "I am done." I stood up, and took my gloves and coat from Anne, slipping them on. My head was in another world, swarming around Lucas and how he had disappeared out of my life.

My mother, had gone to see whether Curtis had the carriage ready, and I trailed after, I finally found my voice, "So, Lucas works with the trade business now?" I tried to shake him from my mind, but it was impossible.

"Yes." She stepped into the carriage and I followed.

"So what does my dress look like?" I tried to change the awkward tension between us and Lucas.

"You will see." She beamed, and patted my hand.

When we arrived at the shop, my mother rushed me in, and pointed toward a dress, that took my breath away, "That's it." She whispered. I walked closer, it was white, with lace sleeves, and pearl accents all over it. It was huge, I wondered how I was going to walk without hitting everyone, and wondering how my body was going to support it.

"Mother!" I gasped.

"You like it?"

"It's gorgeous." I hugged my mother tightly.

"This is the first time, I've seen you excited for a dress." She smiled, "Let's see it on you."

I was ahead of her, pulling off my jack and gloves. I turned, and there was 3 ladies rushing toward me, pulling at my old dress, and petticoat. They slipped two petticoats on that automatically weighed me down, and then the dress. It was heavy, I felt weighted down, but I grabbed a hold of my mother to keep my balance, they laced my dress up till I couldn't breathe. I had to grab a table to keep myself from passing out. I turned toward my mother, and the seamstresses.

"Oh..." My mother gasped, and I swear I saw tears in her eyes.

"What?" I was nervous.

She pointed toward the mirror, I pulled the skirts up, walking toward it.

"Is that me?"

"Yes, Kitten."

I saw the reflection, a girl with pale skin, glowing under the white lace, the dress snitched her waist, creating a perfect hourglass, moving down to a wide hoop skirt, that glistened with small pearls.

"It's perfect." I spun around for her, I spun till I was dizzy and she had to hold me up.

"You look so beautiful, and grown up, darling."

As the assistants got me back in my normal gown, I missed my ball gown. My mother went to pay,

"We will deliver it to your home, the day of the gala."

I followed her out of the shop, and into the carriage once again.

"Now. Before we arrive, you must know something about Rose." My mother's face fell.

"What do you mean?"

"Rose, had small pox last year. And it took its toll. She is weak, and has parts on her arms, that the skin had come off." My mother spoke softly, and I had no words for this.

When we arrived to the Madison's, I saw Mrs. Madison already opening the door, smiling. "Oh Camille, Your gorgeous! And so grown up!" She reached her arms out as I got up her. I hugged her.

"Thank you." I felt a small swelling in my heart.

"Now come in. Rose is already in the sitting room." It was like second nature, I walked down the hall to their sitting room. I walked in, and I saw Rose. She was 2 years older than me. Her long black hair had been cut short, and I could tell it had been shorter. She was thin, and frail, almost see through like parchment. She wore long sleeves, with a high collar. "Camille?"

"Rose, you look lovely." I smiled, taking her hands in mine. "You have grown up so much."

"As have you." That's the moment I noticed the ring on her finger. She caught me looking, "Yes. I have been spoken for. Darius Drexton." The Drextons' were the highest on the food chain for London's high society.

"I am happy for you," I patted her hand, and took a seat beside her, asking her questions about the wedding. But as I looked into her eyes, all I could see was Lucas's eyes.

*this chapter has been updated