xlightusdarkx for the cover!

"Oh hi, yeah, um, have you seen Carter anywhere?"

"Yeah I passed him like a minute ago. He was heading upstairs."

"Alright, thanks," I said, giving him an awkward pat on the shoulder. I jogged upstairs. I instantly regretting doing so, suddenly feeling nauseous. I bit my tongue, refusing to vomit. I had to find Carter and sort this out.

I reached the top and met his back. He was leaning into a girl's ear. I had seen her earlier. It was hard to miss her. She was a foreign exchange student from France. I couldn't even tell you her name. She was attending our school for six months as someone in our year had stayed with her in France six months prior. She had worn a bright, fuchsia dress with diamonties scattered across the top. It was a bit blinding, if I'm honest.

She grabbed his hand and tugged him towards a vacant room. My stomach was in knots by the point. My eyes were burning with the desire to cry.

He turned back. His eyes meeting mine. They were void of emotion. The old Carter that I finally had gotten back, was gone. He gave me his trademark smirk. The one I had grown accustomed to and hated.

A tear slid down my face. I began to walk towards him.

"Don't," I whispered, my voice breaking. "Don't do this."

He reached toward the door, never breaking eye contact.

In one fluid movement, he slammed the door in my face.

I'd just like to thank Jadyn_yap for suggesting the letter idea! :)

Thank you Hayleigh__ for saying the song Safe by West Life reminds her of Carter.

--------------------------------

My legs collapsed underneath me. That's it. I'm so done with him.

"Miss, are you alright?" a voice asked me.

My vision was blurry and my head was spinning. I tipped my head back so I could stare up at the person addressing me. He was crouched down so we were level, but I couldn't see his face. He had a faded, blue skater hat shielding his face. He had broad shoulders and even from this angle, I could tell he was pretty solid. He looked kind of familiar.

"Um, no, not really," I answered, my wrist aching from where I had fallen on it.

"Why don't you come with me?"

"Why would I do that?" I asked, a little taken back.

"Because you don't have a choice."

He met eyes with me and I froze. My entire body went rigid. It was one of the football guys that bashed Carter. The one I hit on the head. He grabbed me roughly, pulling me up. His touch somewhat triggered my muscles and I was able to move again.

His arm snaked around my waist and I screamed. His knuckles jabbed my jaw and my cries died down. He gripped me hard, dragging me off towards a room. This situation just went from 0 to 100 real quick. And I didn't like it.

"CARTER!" I screamed, despite everything that had happened between us in the past twenty minutes.

The door was shut and locked behind him, quicker than I could blink. As everyone was equally, if not more, intoxicated than I was, no one ventured to my rescue. I never thought I would be that girl. The one you read about in online articles or hear on the news. The girl that everyone feels sorry for. And now, this very situation could be happening to me.

"What the hell do you want?" I hissed, stepping away from him. The back of my knees hit the bed and I fell back. My eyes began darting restlessly around the room, trying to find anything I could use to protect myself.

"I don't think I have to spell it out for you."

"You lay a hand on me, I swear to God," I threatened, starting to slowly sober up, but not fast enough. My brain was still foggy from the alcohol. My body still unable to function at normal human speed.

"What?" He questioned, cocking his head to the side. "Your little bitch boy will come save you? He looked pretty occupied a few minutes ago."

"Yeah and he'll kick your ass." I spat, ignoring the hurtful, yet truthful, comment about Carter's actions. I began crawling back as he was inching towards me.

"He didn't do a very good job last time." He smirked.

Reaching forward, he grabbed my leg, easily dragging me forward. I kicked out, jolting him in the cheek. He hardly even blinked. He leapt onto me, his full body weight crushing mine. My heart was slamming into my rib cage. I could hardly hear anything over the sound of my heart beat drumming in my ears.

"Lace? You in there?" Anna called out. I wanted to cry with relief.

"ANNA HELP!" I screamed as loud as I could, before he literally head butted me.

Pain skittered across my forehead and I cried out. I could feel blood trickling down my nose. My vision was blurry before, but now I could hardly see a thing. I was so close to passing out. It was extremely difficult not to close my eyes.

The banging on the door was distant to me. I could hardly comprehend what was happening.

Sudden light flooded into the room. The guy, whose name I don't even know, was pulled off of me.

Ryan had him pinned against the wall. Anna tugged at my hand. I stumbled after her, bleary eyed and still drunk. We practically fell out of the room, into the gaze of a bunch of people, all confused about what was happening.

Amongst the crowd, Carter was trying to push through, to get to me. The collar of his shirt was unbuttoned and his hair messy.

"Lacey!" he called out, grabbing me.

I flinched at his touch.

"Not now," Anna snapped, pushing him from me.

I gazed up at him as she was dragging me away.

We were never going to be the same.

---------------------------

My thoughts were in a whirlwind. All I could see in my head, was Aiden's hand on Lacey, their lips glued together like magnets. I wanted to be sick.

After us being so close again, how could she betray me like that? Had she been hooking up with him this whole time?

Her tanned arms were slender as they wrapped around me. I blinked, trying to focus on the girl in front of me. She began murmuring something in her regular language. Obviously, I didn't understand French.

Her warm, soft lips met mine. I kissed her back at first, before shoving her from me. This wasn't right. After being with Lacey again, I couldn't be with anyone else. It felt too wrong.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her voice laced heavily with her accent.

She was hot, I must admit. But I couldn't go through with it.

"Nothing," I muttered, tearing at the top button my shirt. I was feeling short of breath, for some reason.

She rushed forward, her lips meeting mine. She ran her hands roughly through my hair, as if thinking this passionate act would get me to give in. I pushed her back again, shaking my head.

"I can't, I'm sorry," I groaned, my stomach feeling tight.

"CARTER!"

The blood inside my veins went cold. Was that...?

"Where are you going?"

I hadn't even realised I was running for the door.

"I have to go."

"Do you not find me attractive?" she asked, stepping between me and the door.

"Look," I tried to think of her name, I really did, but I came up blank. "You're smokin' hot. You're probably a really nice girl, but I'm in love. I'm in love with someone else and I can't be with you. I'm sorry. Please, I need to go."

Her face fell. I couldn't stay to comfort her, not when Lacey needed me. I attempted to get through the bodies. Anna was there, beating at the door. I shoved Ryan out of the way and booted the door in. Anna reefed me back by the shirt, making me almost fall over backwards. Ryan rushed in, doing exactly what I had planned to.

"What the hell?" I yelled.

I faced Anna and she slapped me. She literally slapped me. And it hurt like a bitch.

"You're an asshole. Get away from her," she hissed, shoving me roughly back.

I staggered. For a small, petite girl, she sure was strong. She rushed in, grabbing Lacey.

I tried talking to her, but when I met her eyes, they were cold.

She was never going to look at me the same.

---------------------------

Last night had been a complete fucking disaster. And I have no idea what to do about it.

I was in the wrong. I shouldn't have kissed Aiden back. That's only going to send him even more mixed signals then I already had. And frankly, it wasn't worth the drama now between Carter and I.

I thought he'd grown up. Matured, from last time. But the first thing he does again, was lash out and hurt me back. I hadn't intentionally hurt him to begin with. It all happened so fast.

This place was toxic. I needed to get out.

I'm not sure if it's from my hang over (high chance) or the sudden feeling of suffocation and claustrophobia from this place, but something had me running to the bathroom to vomit.

Carter had tried ringing me several times. Obviously, I chose the mature response of ignoring him. So, he sent me a text. The text held a detailed description of that fact that he did not sleep with the French girl. I'm glad, of course, but it doesn't change that he wanted to hurt me again. Like he has so many times.

I'm over it.

I'm over dealing with Carter and his bullshit and I'm over Aiden.

Honestly, I need to get the fuck out of this place.

Anna was coming over later this afternoon. Her aunty works at the flight center in town and has emailed her a bunch of flights, quotes and information about travelling. I can't wait. The urge to leave this place behind me was growing with every second. I wanted out and I wanted out now.

Briefly this morning, I had flicked through some study plans and universities in other countries. But I'm tired. My mind, body and soul is honestly exhausted. I'd like to just travel, and work. Save some money and see the beautiful world around me. I want to get to know me for once.

The last couple weeks, Anna and I have been sending each other website links or articles about a certain place. So far, we were thinking of Hawaii. To just chill out for a year, learn to surf, spend our days on the beach and just relax. I'd fit in well natural golden tan, although most natives had darker hair. Anna would stand out like a flamingo in a pod of pelicans, but she'd probably like that.

Sighing, I rest my chin in the palm of my hand and continued to scroll through tourist travel ideas of Hawaii.

I suddenly couldn't wait to pack my bags and leave.

***

The sudden urgency I was feeling about leaving was obviously mutual. Anna and I, without too much mucking around, began planning our trip to Hawaii. This was serious and it was actually happening. Our parents have okayed it, knowing that there wasn't a chance in hell to stop us anyway. Anna's mum seems to want Anna to leave and honestly, my parents probably want me to leave too. I think it would help everyone if I just left.

My parents, could breathe again. They wouldn't have to worry about me so much. They can just focus on their work and their marriage.

Aiden, can further develop his relationship with Mercedes. They can grow to be the happy family I'm sure they will eventually be.

Carter, can focus on his studies in becoming a paramedic. He can settle down, get his head in the game and become the extraordinary person he's destined to be.

And me? I can get drunk whenever the hell I want, on a beach I probably won't be able to pronounce, getting tanner than I have ever dreamed of being.

This is the most excited I've been about something in a long time. It was a good feeling.

"You're sure you want to do this?" Anna asked me for the upteenth time. "I really can't have you backing out last minute, okay? If we're doing this, we need to be ready to go all the way."

"I'm ready." I replied with determination.

At first, I freaked out about expenses. But since nan passed, she had left me quite a solid amount of money in her will. Plus, my parents are willing to lend me a hand. Anything to just help me get out of the horrible, dark place I'm in now. I'm not sure about Anna's finances, but she seems fine with everything. I'm not going to ask how she's doing it. As long as we're in it together, everything will be great.

I decided, I'm not going to tell Carter I'm leaving. I'm going to write him a detailed letter, pouring out my heart to him. I will slide it under his door and then be gone. I will do the same for Aiden. The letter's, are going to be entirely different. I don't really know where to start with either of them.

"That's a good idea," Anna said, bringing me back to reality. "I think a letter is definitely the way to go. That way you won't get dragged into any, like, passionate kisses or, like, hot break up sex..."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm done with that."

"Sure you are."

"Seriously." I said firmly, shutting my laptop lid. "I'm so done with both of them. I don't want that negativity controlling my life anymore."

"That's the smartest thing I've ever heard you say."

I smiled up at her.

I'm finally ready to move on with my life.

------------------------------

Okay guys, this story is coming to an end soon. Anything you want to see happen before I finish it? Any ideas you want to share? Please holla and let me know!

Thank you cc5auto for the awesome poem about CS!

She's clueless

Doesn't know which path to take,

Scared of loosing one,

But loves another

Her thoughts argue inside of her head,

Feelings stirring into one chemical reaction, about to explode

Everything she loves,

Is making her go crazy,

She needs to forget everything,

Start over again

She's as clueless as a fish,

Just waiting for a juicy and plump worm to drop

But in the end,

Her smile will brighten the world,

Blinding everyone standing in her way

It's a Lacey thing,

You wouldn't understand.