It's been 5 years.

5 years since the worst day of my life.

But I was better now.

Well, better isn't the word I would use to describe it. A better phrase would be...used to it. Yeah. I was used to it now.

Used to the constant lethargy. Used to the ringing in my ear, that most of the time, i'd drown out with the music I used to love. Used to the loneliness i'd feel way too often.

I'm different now.

I'm 22 now.

I have a new job now.

I have an apartment now.

And i'm used to it now.

Violet opened my curtains and abruptly woke me up from my slumber.

"Wake up lazy! It's a beautiful day in the Big Apple and you and I are going out."

I stirred as I squinted my eyes and covered my face with my blanket.

"Absolutely not." I mumbled.

She ripped the blanket off of me and threw it on the floor.

"I didn't move in with you so you could sulk in the apartment all day. We've only been roommates for 8 months but you need to start taking advantage of the fact that we live in New York City more often."

I met Violet while I was in the hospital. Her brother younger brother, Elijah, was in physical therapy with me for about 2 months. Since we had similar injuries, we left the hospital about the same time. Violet and her brother are super close so she was there a lot. The three of us were thick as thieves by the time Elijah and I left the hospital. After we left the hospital, Violet and I got even closer and decided to move in together. I mean, we couldn't live with our parents forever and she was my only friend now.

Violet was also nice enough to help me get my G.E.D. and my real estate license. We both now work at a local real estate agency. I like it there. I appreciate the hustle.

I sat up and glared at Violet. "What are we even gonna do today?"

"Well, it's Sunday and tomorrow is labor day. I think we should drink til we drop."

"No way. Last time I went drinking with you, we woke up at a casino in Long Island with dresses that weren't ours and birthday hats from a party we weren't invited to."

"Ugh! Fine! How about we go to Color Me Mine?"

She knew how much I loved Color Me Mine. It always made me feel relaxed.

"Okay. I'm down. Let's go get ready."

She left my room and I walked over to my drawers to pick out my outfit for the day. It looked a little cold outside so I decided on something a little on the warmer side.

Once I picked out my outfit, I walked into the bathroom to do my makeup. That was something I did more often now.

I looked at myself in the mirror and I noticed how different I look to the girl I was 5 years ago.

I was in the hospital for a long time, so my red striped faded and my roots were grown out. When I got out of the hospital I decided it was time for a change.

I chopped off a lot of my hair and died it black with grey tips.

I didn't want to look like 17 year old me anymore. I envied her. I hated her. She ruined my life.

No Cristina. Remember what your therapist said. Happy thoughts, happy actions, happy life.

If only it was that easy.

I didn't do much makeup today. I simply filled in my eyebrows and put some mascara on. I didn't feel like trying too hard.

As always, I was the first one ready. So I sat on the couch and watched cartoons while I waited for Violet. A Bugs Bunny rerun came on. I had to quickly change it before I felt like sobbing. Before, I fell into that place again.

I waited for about 20 more minutes before she was ready and we were on our way. I used to hate driving. After I left the hospital it took me a long time before I could start driving again. Violet helped a lot though. She pushed me, without overwhelming me. She knew how to help me pace myself. Now I love driving. I drive us everywhere. I learned something though. As much fun as driving is, always...pay...attention. It sounds simple enough, but people often forget how important it is. I had to learn that the hard way.

I parked behind the Color Me Mine building and we walked inside. I picked out a little bowl. I needed something to put my bracelets and rings in. Violet picked out a mermaid mug. I giggled at her choice.

"What?" She said playfully. "Mermaids are amazing!"

"Yes they are. I'm just surprised you didn't pick the mermaid jewelry box over there."

"There's a mermaid jewelry box?!"

After sticking with our original choices, we began to paint our items. It took us a while and I few stained articles of clothing, but we managed to beautifully finish painting our items. We left them on the tray for the worker to go and put them in the kiln.

"I'm starving how about you?" Violet asked me.

"Eh. I could eat if you're that hungry?"

"Well, I am. We're going to Wendy's."

I loved being with Violet. She brought a sense of spontaneity back into my life after the accident. A sense of randomness and impulsivity.

That's stuff he used to do with me.