"Do you miss her?"

I look at Gavin who's laying beside me on the couch. We're watching We're The Millers and eating popcorn because we don't have much else to do and Gavin's back to babysitting me again. It's weird to even say that in my head because he's technically my boyfriend now?

"Mia?"

I nod my head and toss a piece of popcorn into my mouth. Gavin's body shifts uncomfortably before he puts his head onto my shoulder.

"Is it fucked up to say no?"

"Just because she's dead doesn't mean you have to lie about missing her." I laugh lightly. "You really don't miss her?"

"No." He nonchalantly replies.

"Oh." I say. "Would you miss me?"

Gavin's head turns up to look at me and his eyebrows are furrowed. His expression clearly reads he's wondering if I'm actually crazy or not.

"No."

I playfully hit his head and he starts laughing before he gets on top of me and rests his head on my chest. I groan because he's not very light but he is very warm so it makes up for it.

"Of course I'd miss you." He says. "Your the first girl I've ever actually liked."

I can't stop the grin that he's brining to my lips.

"I'm flattered what do I win?" I tease.

"I mean I could award you in a lot of ways?" Gavin adds tickling my neck with his kisses his hand bunches up the fabric of my shirt as he lifts it up and slides his hand underneath. My back slightly arches when I feel him suck the skin on my neck my body digs further into his chest. "Should we go upstairs?"

I realize we're in the living so if anything starts to happen my mom could enter at any moment. I eagerly nod my head and Gavin gets off the couch first before I stand up and he picks me up. I think I enjoy being carried around by him.

We enter my room and Gavin closes the door behind him and locks the door. Oh. He lays me onto the bed and I pull my shirt over my head as he does the same. My eyes light up as I see the tattoo on his chest, it definitely adds a lot more to his personality, it's hot.

I bite my lip as he takes his jeans off and meets me under the covers. He was starting to leave behind his heavenly scent in my sheets.

The desire between the two of us begins to grow and I can't help but feel in some way when we met my heart told me it was him, it would always be him. The most beautiful part about that is the fact that I was never looking when I found him.

His touch sends waves through my skin and it's enough to make me melt.

If I died now it wouldn't be so bad, at least I would die happy.

We look at each other and smile, I run my fingers through his silky hair as his thumb caresses the skin on my cheek.

"I love you." He says hugging me tighter in his arms.

"I love you." I bury my head into his chest, wishing it could stay like this just a bit longer but my mother should be home soon. I untangle myself from his hold and pick my clothes from off of the ground to put them back on as Gavin does the same.

We say are goodbyes for the night and Gavin leaves to go hang out with Beckham and Carver so I call up Peyton and tell her all about this little escapade. Peyton never judged me for my decisions unlike some other people I know. She was happy that I was finally happy.

"Are you coming to the Halloween party tomorrow? It's at Beckham's house." Peyton asks me.

"Most likely, my moms been letting me go out a lot more so I don't see why not." I answer. "That doesn't mean I'm going to dress up though."

"What it's Halloween that's literally the one day any girl can dress up as slutty as they want without being judged, you have too!"

"I don't have a costume." I groan through the phone.

"I have some I'll bring them over tomorrow and then we can leave for the party together."

I'm biting my fingernails because I'm not sure I want to be exposed, I don't even know what Gavin would think. I mean I shouldn't care what he thinks, if I wanted to dress up like a slut I could right?

"Okay just please don't bring any of your least revealing costumes?" I add.

"I got you covered."

We end the call and I take my medication before the night ends and I go to sleep.

"Peyton will be here soon so can you leave?" I say, I try my best to ask him nicely but it doesn't seem to work.

"I told you I didn't want you going to that party especially if you'll be wearing some sexy costume." Gavin reminds me.

"I make my own decisions, we'll be there by ten." I tell him pushing him out of my room. "I'll see you later okay?"

"Ugh fine." He groans.

Peyton enters my room only a few minutes after with a wardrobe of clothes. "Those are all your costumes?" I ask her.

"Yes but I have the perfect one just for you." She searches through it until she pulls out a black bodysuit that has a lot of slits and openings. I'm not sure how well that will even cover anything.

"This? What even is this?" I laugh and take it from her hands examining it for myself.

"It's your costume, it's brand new and your size so it's happening now let's get you looking all nice and sexy for Gavin." She claps her hands and pulls me along with her.

"That's exactly what Gavin didn't want." I tell her honestly. I could just imagine the look on his face and I'm worried he'll be angry or he'll just shut up and tell me I look great.

"Really? Sorry, I'm still getting used to this respectable guy he's suddenly become?" Peyton laughs and starts putting makeup on my face. "How was it anyway? The you know-"

"Sex." I say for her, she's trying her best to be subtle and nods her head at me.

"Well you weren't wrong about it hurting but it was different a very good different, then once it happened my whole body felt like it sorta belonged to him in that moment and then the second time-"

"The second time!" Peyton squeals. "Go on."

"The second time the pain subsided and it was nothing but pleasure, I don't know it's weird isn't it?" I ask her.

She shakes her head. "It's love, there's nothing more weirder than that, I never imagined myself wanting to settle down until Beckham came along, I mean that's pretty weird and fucked up like my hearts a desperate bitch."

Peyton wasn't wrong about hearts being desperate all the time, but we did have a choice, whether we decide to follow them or not.

Within the next hour Peyton manages to finish my hair and makeup before I try on the body suit. I hate that once it's on it fits me perfectly and I actually like how it looks in the mirror. I even put on some black heels and it pulls the look together very well.

I didn't want to be mistaken for a hooker tonight. I walk out of the bathroom and find Peyton in a full black cat suit.

"I knew it would look great on you." She tells me. "We should get going."

I grab my phone hoping I won't lose it at the party because I have no pockets. I'm also glad my mother's in her room so I sneak passed so she doesn't see me. I know she'd freak out.

We make it outside and I'm hit with the cold air. Parties were usually very warm inside so I couldn't wait to get there now.

We get to Beckham's house and the driveway and streets are already filled with cars and people. Peyton and I hurriedly walk inside and I warm up rather quickly when we head through the crowd.

I look around at the costumes most girls are wearing so maybe I wouldn't be the only one mistaken as a hooker, I feel a lot better now. Some girls were wearing nothing but a bra and their underwear? What kinda of costume even was that?

We find Beckham, Carver and Gavin in another room watching some people play beer pong. I can already see Gavin's whole body tense up as he recognizes me. He wasn't wearing a costume? Great.

"Hey baby!" Peyton calls out for Beckham and he picks her up in his arms for a long embrace.

I walk over to Gavin who seems like he doesn't even want to talk to me. Why couldn't we be as happy as Peyton and Beckham? Oh right because my boyfriend was stubborn and he seemed to like everything his way.

"You really had to wear that tonight?" He pulls me closer to him and looks down at the outfit, I can tell by the way his eyes are looking at me he wants to rip this off of me.

"You don't like it?" I ask him, he rolls his eyes at me and leans down to kiss me but I push his face away and laugh, nice try. "What's in the cup?"

"Water." He replies.

"Then let me have some." I reach for the cup but he quickly jerks it away from my reach. I knew it, liar. "No kisses for you then."

"It's cheap liquor." Gavin finally tells me.

I don't mind that Gavin's drinking, it's a party that's what people do I just didn't appreciate the fact that he finds the need to lie to me about it.

"Can I get a kiss now?" He smirks at me before wrapping his arms around my waist. I give in to those eyes and he leans down again and are lips meet. I can taste the liquor on his lips when my tongue brushes over his bottom lip, it isn't bad though.

We both pull away and smile.

"We're heading into the basement, you guys joining?" Beckham asks us.

"Yeah we'll be down in a bit." Gavin tells him. "But first your coming with me."

Before I can protest Gavin grabs my hand and drags me along with him. I notice the way guys are looking at me now and it makes me uncomfortable. I don't even wanna know their intentions.

The cold air hits me once again when we head outside. We stop at Gavin's car and he pops open the back of his trunk and hands me a sweatshirt. This one is also black like the last one he gave me but it reads Cambridge in bold letters on the back.

I don't hesitate to put it on or argue with him because it's freezing cold out here and I needed something to cover up more than this outfit is capable of. I only wish I had my converse so I could change out of these heels.

"That's better." Gavin gives me smug smile and takes me back into the party.

We join are friends in the basement and we haven't even been here for more than thirty minutes and Peyton's already tipsy. I'm glad Beckham's actually taking care of her but he's not far from where she is.

Carvers chatting it up with a blonde in the corner of the room who doesn't seem very interested.

"No where'd your costume go?" Peyton asks me. "You know I should probably take mine off too it's getting pretty hot."

I stop Peyton before she starts undressing herself. Maybe it was already time for her to go to bed? "I'll take her upstairs into my room." Beckham says picking her up in his arms.

"Yes so you can help undress me." Peyton laughs. "Wait my cup-"

The night had only began and my experience with parties never end well but this was the first time Gavin and I were officially together so maybe things would be different?