The time just evaporates as Kookie and I finish up a shared sample platter of Italian desserts. This has been the best time ever, with Kookie. I now feel incredibly close to him. One thing I know for sure is that he is definitely a friend. I also know, for certain, I want more.

There is something about the way he looks at me that makes me believe he has an attraction to me. He certainly did not have to laugh at my lame jokes or show an interest in the running of my farm. His questions were of the nature of someone with a sincere interest, not just being nice.

I can't recall the last time I've had such an enjoyable evening that did not include Tannie and Zeus. One thing for sure, the unpleasant topic of Tommie Chen never came up again.

There have been mild flirtations, between us both. A gentle touch, a smile with a flip of hair.

I feel a bit hesitant because it has been quite a while since my last relationship and with Kookie being a celebrity there's a risk involved.

What if I have misjudged him? While I love and respect his television personality, it is not the Kookie that is before me. This Kookie is different and I feel a different attraction.

It is a stir that I have never felt with this level of intensity. However, I'm not one to live in uncertainty or to shy away from making the first move. I will ask him out on a formal date tonight, I'm not backing away from this, whatever it is.

"Kookie, that was the best Fettuccine, ever. That bolognese sauce was to die for and don't get me started on the tiramisu," I say as I lean back and pat my stomach.

Kookie smiles the most adorable smile and rewards me with that chuckle I love. It is sweet and playful. We bid goodbye to Alfonse and wave to Chef Ramon.

Surprisingly, after we ordered he did not return to our table which was fine with me. I appreciated the uninterrupted time alone with Kookie. As we exit the restaurant, I receive a text from Jin who apologizes for the earlier incident and has rescheduled our meeting for tomorrow.

I send a quick confirmation as we get into the taxi. The shared ride to drop Kookie off at his residence is more lively and animated than the earlier ride. We even debate the best brand of frozen pizza.

Kookie has a wonderful sense of humor. He also is shy, which I like. This never comes across on the show. I feel a connection and I desire to be close to him.

"I was thinking about what you said earlier. You know, about celebrities having this other side. We present a side that's not true to make us or our show more attractive. Tae, there are some parts of my show that aren't real," he says and then looks down at his hands.

"What? You don't wear those tight-ass sexy pants all the time? I'm appalled," I say jokingly with a slight chuckle, as he responds with a playful slap to my thigh.

"No silly," He says allowing his hand to linger and rest just a moment as I feel my cock twitch.

I look up at him not knowing where he is going yet, I'm eager to listen to him. It's as if he is about to confess something as the taxi stops in front of his building. He looks around and then pauses. We both sit in an awkward silence.

"Kookie, I guess I'll see you tomorrow at my rescheduled appointment with Jin. Got to get that gift basket, you know." I joke lightly to lift the building tension.

We don't move. We just sit in the silence. He chuckles and shyly lowers his head and then looks back up at me. It's apparent that we both are not finding it easy to part and I have yet to ask him out. I must do it now. I slowly draw in a deep breath and release it before speaking.

"Kookie, I-I'm taking some time off until after Christmas and will be here longer. I had a great time tonight. Would you go out with me again? Well, this was us unofficially going out, however..."

"Yes, Taehyung. I would like to go out, again. When?" He says with a beautiful smile and bright eyes.

I momentarily freeze and become speechless given the eagerness of Kookie's response. He's interested. Oh God, Tae, don't fuck this up. Say something damn it.

"Uh yeah, like whenever you want to." Idiot. I want to go out with him tomorrow. I cannot wait to see him again. If he'd invite me up right now, I'd go.

"Tae, I'll see you tomorrow I guess, and we can look at our schedules. Well, I'll look at mine seeing as you're on vacation. Maybe, I can show you the city," he says as I have the impure thought that I'd like to start tonight with a tour of his bedroom and his gorgeous body. I swallow as I feel a heat rise in me.

Again, we find ourselves in the silence of our dimly lit taxi. I'm not sure what to say, yet I don't want him to leave. He slides in a bit closer as I automatically lean in towards him in response.

My heart is racing as we are both breathing heavily. I feel the heat of his breath on my chin as my hand moves slowly and gently cups the back his neck pulling him to me. My eyes immediately drop to his plump lips as I lick my lips in sweet anticipation of our contact.

His lips are soft and warm. I start with several gentle pecks as I place my hand around his slender waist and pull him closer to me. Slowly I lick his bottom lip and gently suck it into my mouth.

As he moans I slip my tongue into his oral cavity and begin to explore. We both moan into the kiss as it deepens. It is wet, hot and full of passion. Fervently, I suck, lick and softly bite as I taste him. He is delicious and I want more.

"Oh God, Tae, mmm," he says as we separate only for our need to breathe.

"Uh, maybe you could come up and, I'll uh, check my schedule," he says in a sexy voice just above a whisper.

He smiles and all I can do is nod. Oh God, he's turned me into a speechless fool. The awkward silence returns as we both close the proximity between us again, and breath heavily.

I lean in looking down at his gorgeous lips and I want him. He places his hand on my thigh lightly as we begin to merge. I part my lips slightly preparing to receive him, again.

Suddenly, there a tapping on the window and we both look up and quickly move apart. I release a shaky breath that I was holding as Kookie quickly removes his hand from my thigh. It's Jin.

"Kookie! Open that door now!"

Kookie looks over at me and then pushes the door open. "Goddammit Jin," he says speaking through his teeth with forced restraint. I sigh heavily as I relate to the tension I hear in his voice.

I relax pressing my back into the seat. I am panting. He turns and softly smiles as he exits.

I lightly touch his hand and he stops and turns to me again. Before I speak he says, "No, Tae, please wait," he says with a pained look.

"Kookie, I'll talk to you tomorrow. It's okay. Jin's concerned."

"Tae, I wanted to..." he starts to speak, and I complete his thought.

"I know. Me too," I say and softly smile up at him. We both wanted that connection, that kiss. It's a good place to pause as much as I don't want to.

I watch as the taxi pulls away.

"Kookie, did you even think for a moment that we were worried?" Jin demands putting his hand on his hips and leaning towards me. His voice is strained, and I feel some guilt over the offense of not letting him know I was okay.

"Sorry, Jin. I should have reached out. However, I'm sure Namjoon was not worried. I know him all too well and he knows me," giving him an easy nod.

Jin actually chuckles a bit as we ride the elevator up to my penthouse unit. "What's that smile about Jin? What did Namjoon say?" I ask raising my eyebrows in response to Jin's losing his battle to stay angry with me.

"He said I should leave you alone and maybe you'd get your brains fucked out. Is that what I interrupted?"

I shyly look down and then smile up at him. "Possibly, damn it."

"Oh my God! You whore! I'm sorry I got in the way, but your ass should have called me. It's your own fault, Kookie." Jin then playfully nudges me.

I laugh as we enter. I fall into my soft sofa feeling so light and relaxed. "Jin, we kissed," I say touching three fingers to my lips finding it unbelievable. It all happened so fast and God did I want more.

"He's a normal guy and I like him. I really do," I say sitting up and smiling with no desire to restrain my feelings or conceal my smile.

Jin looks at me with concern as I continue to talk not allowing what I believe will be his negative warning remarks. I don't want to hear about image or what I have to do. I'm done with that. I want a regular guy, a regular life. I want Taehyung.

"Jin, I know you have concerns, it's only been two days. But there's something about him and I just can't ignore it, even if I wanted to. Oh my God, we went to Alfonse's and Chef Ramon was there," I say bring my hands to my cheeks with a slight added gasp.

Jin leans in further as he is enjoying the tidbits of information. He knows from my response that something shocking occurred.

"Chef Ramon? He's hot and talented," Jin says with a wicked smile wiggling his eyebrows.

"Yes, Jin precisely. He was giving Tae 'the eyes' and I was so angry! I had to shut him down, which is unlike me." Jin places his hand over his mouth indicating his disbelief.

I tell Jin the entire story and he laughs. He then starts to rapidly clapping his hands. A response I had not expected, however it is nice.

Jin has surprised me a few times today. I feel closer and more trusting of him. It's as if our relationship has been elevated. I feel like he has my back.

"Kookie, that's all great. I was going to tell you I'm concerned that you just met him. But you are not one to be reckless. I trust you and I also did a little background check on Kim Taehyung," Jin says with a sly smile. I quickly sit straight up at attention not knowing what to say rubbing my hands together nervously.

"Well, do you want to hear it or not?' he asks as he reaches into his shoulder bag and pulls out an envelope and wiggles it at me teasingly. Why does this seem like a violation to me? Like I'm listening to Tae's deep dark secrets.

"Kookie, we do these all the time on other celebrity guests and new employees. Look, there's nothing scandalous here," Jin says placing the envelope on the table in front of me. He tilts his head to the right curiously, stands, and then sits next to me. He examines my eyes and takes my hand. I'm slightly vibrating.

"Kookie, he is really important to you." He then pauses. "Isn't he?" He now knows what I have just discovered. This is far deeper than infatuation. I should feel excited but I feel scared. There's so much I need to tell Taehyung and I don't want to ruin things. Earlier, I tried to tell him about the show and things that were not as they seem. I know it will be okay. It just has to.

I slowly nod and then look down at my hands as a rush of sadness overtakes me. It is unexpected and I'm embarrassed as I lower my head unable to conceal my feelings. I uncontrollably start tapping my right foot as I try to keep the top on my emotions and cannot.

"Jin, what's happening to me? This is foolish. Yet, I can't stop it." I cover my mouth with one hand crossed over the other as I try to hold in the sounds of my sobs.

Jin hugs me as my sobs come up and are slowly and painfully released. I shake my head and apologize for being such a mess. "Jin, I'm so sorry."

"Kookie, don't apologize. The same thing happened to me with Namjoon. I was overwhelmed and taken over by him. It made no sense. I was in love after knowing him about as long as you have known Taehyung."

"Love?"I whisper as I lower my head to my lap while Jin rubs my back.

I don't want to believe this. Love. I should feel happy, but I feel like a fool.

Taehyung has done nothing deliberate, but I feel as if I have no control and that scares the shit out of me. I organize and stay on top of things to maintain control in my life. I'm definitely not on top of this.

"Oh God, Jin, I'm fucked!" I moan as Jin chuckles. I quickly pop my head up and turn to him puzzled.

"Jin, there is no humor in this. How am I suppose to be with him on set and at Christmas, feeling these feelings?"

"Kookie, the heart wants what the heart wants. Did you even consider that he may have feeling for you too?"

I grip my thighs and rub my hands back and forth towards my knees as fear grips me.

"Jin, he's a fan. No more!" I say in full panic.

"Oh, really?" Jin asks. "I thought he was a normal guy."

I stop cold hearing Jin. He's right. He's a normal guy. A normal guy whose name I'd probably be screaming by now if Jin had not had tapped on that taxi window. God, I wish Jin would not have tapped on that window.

"Jin, why am I so scared? I want him but it scares me terribly. "

"Kookie, I was terrified that Namjoon would not love me and I'd be hurt and alone. I questioned for far too long whether I should take the risk or not. I took the risk and it was the best thing that I have ever done."

I sit back and breathe slowly nodding my head.

"Kookie, the information I found on Taehyung shows him to be good and decent. In fact, he and his brother own one of the biggest farms in Asia. The Kim Corporation has several factories in Asia and produces much of the food we eat.

"They protect the environment and have developed modern methods of farming globally. In fact, Taehyung was here giving a lecture on farming in the new millennium. He's well educated, and the Kim Corporation is worth multi-millions. Yet, he and his brother still live in the home they grew up in. These brothers are brilliant. Kookie, he is a real hero and a good man. Damn, if I wasn't madly in love with my man, I'd be all over that." Jin then burst into laughter as do

He's a regular guy who is smart and financially secure. He is not a gold-digger." Jin concludes.