I can't believe this is it.

Tomorrow is my wedding. I was sitting near my big window looking at the moon.

Is this really going to happen?

Will he really marry me and take me away from my family?

I can't believe this. Who gets married at the age of 19? I am not properly 19 even.

I feels so weird.

From tomorrow my parents would no longer be responsible for me. He would be.

I diverted my concentration towards my feet and hands which were adorned with beautiful henna.

Will it give a dark colour? Mumma said the darker the colour of henna is the deep is the love of a husband for his wife is.

If this is true, then it will not give any colour because he can't love me.

My dream of feeling loved is shattered.

After our engagement we never had a talk. Even at the engagement we were sitting together but never talked. We only touched the feet of our elders and hugged the younger ones.

It was as if we were in a business meeting.

I can't believe my life is being so cruel to me. From the starting I was always alone. I hated this stupid solitude. Though I met Noor in 11th standard but we never had a strong bonding like sisters.

I see her as my best friend but can't share everything with her same goes with her.

I wanted a sibling but it was just a dream.

I saw children complaining about their siblings. I always envied it.

I also wanted someone who fought with me and then console me.

I sighed deeply. Though I had a beautiful childhood. But it was accompanied by my solitude.

Though I have many cousins. I am not close to my cousins from my father's side. They always showed I was different. Not their sibling. It hurts like hell.

My cousins from my mother's side were nice to me. I even enjoyed with them. End of the day I was alone.

Now when I am getting married. I know what kind of life I am going to have?

A life full of solitude and tears.

I can expect anything from him.

Even if he brings a new girl daily with him. I wouldn't be surprised. Why? Every girl wants his attention. I don't think he would deny it.

"Princess sleep now. You have a big day tomorrow ", papa said while entering in the room followed by mumma.

"Can I remove the henna from my hands and feet", I asked. It was quite uncomfortable.

"No sweetie you can't ", mumma said.

I am not going to argue.

"I guess your henna has dried. You can sleep the way you want but don't remove it.", she said.

I took a deep breath and layed my head on her lap while papa patted my head loving.

This is my heaven.

"I love you mumma papa. You are the best parents in the world.",I told them.

" what about me? ", Dadi entered in my room and asked pretending a hurt look.

"you are the best dadi in the world", I said while hugging her. She chucked ruffling my hair.

"now sleep doll", she said and again layed my head on my mother's lap and after some time I fell in deep slumber.

"Wake up sweetheart it's already 9 am", I heared mumma calling me.

I groaned and covered my face with a pillow.

"Wake up Shreya", she again called.

I tried to sleep again.

"Shreya don't make me angry today. I have many other works", she said.

"then wake me after completing your work", i told her.

"if I didn't wake you up you would be sleeping till 5 in evening", she told me.

I groaned again but then woke up.

"Go take a bath", she told me.

"Give me my clothes", I told her.

"Who will give your clothes to you from tomorrow", she asked.

"Mr. Khurana", I told her. As if he would.

Sweetheart may be you are the one who will be taking care of him. ,my brain mocked.

You are right. But he is not knowing what I am saying. At least I can console myself.

You are right.

"Mumma wedding is at night. ", I asked her sitting straight on the bed.

"haldi", she said.

Okay. Haldi.

Well the readers who are not aware of this ritual. Traditionally, people make a paste using turmeric and different ingredients according to their individual family customs. While some mix it with sandalwood powder and milk, others mix it with rose water. This paste is then applied on the bride and the groom's face, neck, hands and feet, by their near and dear ones. This ceremony is also accompanied by traditional songs and dances at times.

She gave me my outfit and I got ready in 30 minutes.

As usual with minimum makeup.

Haldi was to come from Rehan's house. My family members would apply the haldi of Rehan's name on my body.

The ceremony ended after an hour.

After this it is a custom that the brother of bride's mother will carry the bride from her place where she was sitting during the ritual. She can't walk herself.

Mama came and carried me from my place and took me to my room.

"don't make her fall Abhi"papa shouted.

"I am not an old man like you. I can hold her perfectly. Right princess", he asked me and I giggled.

"I know very well what you are", papa said in an irritated voice.

They always have these cute fights.

I entered in my bathroom and took a long bath.

After This the beauticians entered anf started my makeup.

It took 5 long hours to complete my make up. This is a record.

Well to get rid of that boring atmosphere. I played music on my phone and relaxed.

Waiting for the hell to arise after the wedding.

After this I changed in my lehenga which mama brought for me. It is again a ritual.

If you all are interested to know the colour of my heena. It's the darkest shade of brown. Everyone is teasing me because of this. I knew this is all just a saying. There is nothing like this.

I sat in my room with my 10kg lehenga.

Yes 10 kg lehenga with heels.

I am 5'7 but still I am wearing heels why?

I looked in the mirror. That was not me. She was Rehan's bride. Not me.

I heard the voice of band. They are here.

My cousins entered in my room.

Ananya my older sister came towards me smiling brightly. If you are curious she is from my mother's side.

"He is looking so handsome. Really Shreya you are one lucky girl.", she said.

"you know Shreya she gave 50000 rupees to Ananya for aarti and 25000 to me for neem jhadai", she said.

Neem jhadai is the ritual where the bride's sister sprinkles water on the groom with a twig from a Neem tree. Neem tree has many medicinal uses and is hence considered a sacred tree by Hindus. In order to protect her brother-in-law from evil eye and harm, the bride's sister ceremoniously sprinkles water from the Holy Ganges on the groom. In exchange she gets a small gift from the groom.

Aarti married sister of the bride honors the groom by performing the traditional Aarti, where she blesses him. She also puts a teeka on the groom's forehead and wards off evil eye from him. In exchange she gets a small gift from the groom.

Soon my mother came and took me for Jaimala on the stage.