A wave of numbness seeps into my veins like morphine, sweeping aside all my emotions.

From where we stand, there's a crack view of the living room, but Maddie's head is blocking me from most of it. As she weeps and leans against the wall for support, I hold her arm to keep her upright before deciding to take the lead.

After all, someone has to take the first step.

I sidestep her. The house is in a clutter of mess, the tattered curtains flutter right by the shattered window. The white floor stains with a stream of dried blood and I follow the trail, which eventually leads me to the first body on the carpeted floor right beside the smashed coffee table.

A horrified gasp escapes my lips, and I choke out in tears. My vision blurs at the awful sight.

"Uncle Josh."

If it isn't for his favorite green jumper, I wouldn't have recognised Maddie's father. His body, mangled beyond recognition, lies among the glass fragments.

The trail of blood doesn't end there. It guides me towards the master bedroom where we find another body—Aunt Reese—on the bed with a gaping hole in her chest. Just a meter away, I find Kiki on the floor. Her once golden fur is now dulled and matted with blood.

Oh, god. My family.

I stagger backwards, turn around and run into Zarius's chest as his arms hold my shoulders steady. I clutch at him tightly, my body quivering. My breath comes out shaky, gnawing onto my trembling lips, as I fight to keep the tears at bay.

"No, no, no..." I search around in a panic. "Gramps... Where is he?"

"Outside," Zarius answers softly and apologetically. "I'm sorry, Delia."

Sobbing, I release him and head for the kitchen's back door. I know where Gramps is. He must be in his favorite spot on the veranda that oversees the backyard–an old, rocking armrest chair surrounded by his precious pet parakeets. They are all gone now, their cages ripped apart.

And then I see Gramps. No wonder Zarius can smell him, because it is that bad. The air is really thick with a foul stench. Gramps is long dead, reduced to skin and bones. The only thing left is the golden wedding ring on his left fourth finger, which is covered in dirt.

Being out in the open, he must have been the first one to be targeted.

And just that thought alone crumbles my heart.

The strength in my legs seeps out of me. Zarius is already waiting to catch me as I fall to the ground on my knees. I bury my face in his chest and wrap my arms around him tightly.

"Gramps was a good man," I sob. "He doted on us a lot. Spoiled us. I don't have a dad, but Gramps took care of that role. Why is this happening to us, Zarius?"

Zarius inhales sharply, his tone full of remorse. But I know that none of this is his fault. "I'm really sorry, Delia. I really am."

Fear grips me. There are several possibilities of how this apocalypse would play out, but each one gets scarier than the one before.

"I'm scared," I admit. "What if I end up finding Mom dead too? I don't think I can live through that."

He cradles my head, brushing through my hair gently. "We'll find her alive, I promise."

I lean my forehead against his chest as tears drip down my cheeks. If I don't find Mom alive, I will go insane. Ballistic. There will be nothing else for me to live for if she's taken away from me too.

I hate this apocalypse. Everything except Zarius.

We stay there for ages, listening to Maddie's cries in the background when she eventually finds her dead mother and Gramps.

***

Burying not just one person but a whole family is agonizing. Your heart feels empty. Your mind goes lost in a thick fog, losing sight of reality. When you stare ahead, you find a long tunnel. Your spirit feels like a truck—no—a train has hit you and leaves you all battered now. Defeated.

Maddie doesn't speak much, but I know she's still reeling in shock. Like me. The pain of seeing your dead loved ones is excruciating, and it hurts me to know that nothing I say can help ease her sorrow.

We work in silence, wrapping their bodies in blankets. As the sun dips lower, we bury them in the backyard and place a family portrait on top of a mound of pebbles.

Zarius is a kind-hearted friend. I don't think he has ever dug a human grave before, but he does the job diligently. Each time my tears slip out, he holds me dearly. If I got my tears and snot all over his shirt, he doesn't seem to mind that.

Looking at him, it tells me that goodness hasn't run out in this world.

After the burial, Maddie spends hours sitting in front of the graves. With the daunting night approaching, it takes a great deal of persuasion to pull my cousin out of the yard and back into the house.

"Maddie—"

She holds up a finger to silent me. Her red-rimmed eyes are looking at the wooden floorboard. "I-It's fine, Delia. I'm fine. Just give me some time alone."

I nod quietly. We gather more blankets and a sleeping bag before hiding in the attic, which was renovated as a guest room. It reminds me of the times when I used to camp here with Mom whenever we had a sleepover. There are two beds, so Maddie and I take one each. Zarius offers to take the floor, even though the sleeping bag doesn't fit him at all. He's so tall that his legs stretch beyond the end.

We cover up the window with a quilt, and push a bedside table against it. Candles are lit, but not that many. Maybe just two or three. As long as we stay quiet throughout the night, no creatures would notice us.

Maddie doesn't look at us. She hides her face from us by rolling over to the other side and showing us her back in silent grief. If she's crying, she doesn't want us to see it.

I roll over to my side so that I'm facing Zarius and I poke his arm. "Hey."

He's sprawled on the floor and blinks up at me, attempting to repeat the human greeting. "Hey...?"

I shoot him a weak smile. "Thank you for what you did for us today, Zarius. You didn't need to do this for us, but you did it anyway."

He's silent for a while, with a strange look on his face. "You," he corrects me. "I didn't do it for others. I did it for you."

Something stirs inside my chest. A warmth that envelops me and fills the hollowness in my chest. But what's more painful is this ache in my heart, and I feel like a badger craving for honey. Like an alcoholic craving for beers. Like a man who has just gotten out of a desert and thirsts for fresh water.

My heart thuds fervently and beyond my control. The longer I stare at Zarius, the more I'm convinced that I'm about to go insane. The rational part of me has left my body and hurled out of the window.

I peek over my shoulder to see if Maddie is awake. I can hear her lightly snore, so I know she's passed out from exhaustion. Turning back to Zarius, I whisper softly.

"Zarius."

"Hm?"

"I can't sleep."

I can't think straight. There's like something bubbling in my chest, itching to burst. And my skin feels boiling, like I'm running a fever.

Zarius stares up at me in puzzlement just as a bold offer rolls out of my lips. "Do you...do you want to come up onto the bed?"

Something dark flickers in his eyes, but he blinks it away. "That is not a good idea."

"Why not?"

"It will break under my weight and it will not fit my height," he remarks stiffly. "Go to sleep, halfling."

"Oh." My tone falters. So now he's deliberately putting distance between us by calling me halfling? What on earth is he hiding? "But I feel...bad. And I can't hear you properly if we're going to whisper to each other like this."

"Then we shall rest and not talk. Good night, Delia."

He closes his eyes and feigns sleep, but he's startled when I suddenly get off my bed and go to his side. I plant my hands on his cheeks, forcing him to look at me. In this position, he cannot run away from me.

His body stiffens at our proximity. "What are you doing, Delia?"

I study his surprised expression. "You're not telling me something, Zarius. What are you hiding?"

He raises a brow. "I'm not. You're imagining things, Delia."

"Am I?" I wonder thoughtfully and rub at my burning chest a few times in frustration. "Something's wrong with me, Zarius. I can feel it. I-I don't know how to explain. Ever since I half-morphed, I've been experiencing something strange. It's hot in here. Am I sick?"

A sigh escapes his lips and that response confirms my suspicion. "So there is something that you're hiding from me."

He frowns at me. "It is not the right time to tell you, Delia."

"Then when is the 'right' time?" I demand. "If we're going to live everyday like this and not know what the future holds for us, isn't it best to tell me now? Before I die? Am I losing my human instincts? Am I mutating and about to turn into a monster that craves flesh and blood? I don't know why when I look at you, I feel like I'm about to combust."

As I hit my chest twice, trying to drive out that strange sensation in my chest, he catches my wrist to stop me. "That's not it."

"Then what is it?" I'm pushing his buttons, and he knows it. "Explain to me in words that I can at least understand. Please?"

Zarius stares up at me wordlessly, until something shifts in his gaze, somewhere between temptation and determination. In a fluid motion, he flips our positions so that he's on top of me right now, his hands caging my head.

I gulp nervously. "What are you doing, Zarius?"

His eyes are blazing with desire, with lust. "You tempted me first."

"What?" I always believed he has been hanging around me and refusing to leave my side because I'm half merfolk. Because we're similar.

But it's more than that. All these times, he has been holding back himself, but today, I've pushed him over the edge and forced him to reveal his feelings.

He wants me.

Just like I do.

He leans towards me, his nose nuzzling mine. His voice is husky with need. "Cordelia Walters, Daughter of the Seas. You will be the death of me," he swears. "Is this answer clear enough for you?"

My breath hitches in my throat. I don't answer, but my hands are gripping his jacket. Unwilling to let him go.

When he sees that I'm not resisting or pulling away, something in him shifts.

And his lips seal over mine.

😳