《SLOW BURN》37. most definitely, yes
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I wake up to the feeling of Josh's arm around my waist. I don't open my eyes and enjoy the feeling of my back pressed against his chest. I can feel his even breaths. He presses his lips against my hair and kisses me. He makes me feel so loved without much effort. I could get used to waking up like this every morning. It feels like a dream to be here in bed, in Josh's arms.
I try not to think about anything. Nothing else matters for now. It's just him and I. Just how I wanted it to be. I keep my eyes closed and pretend to be asleep for as long as I can but soon, I need to use the restroom so I finally open my eyes. I move my arm and place my hand on top of Josh's so he knows I'm awake.
"Good morning," he says against my hair.
"Hey," I say turning to look at him. "I need to go pee."
He chuckles then takes his arm off of me. "Hurry up."
I smile then get out of bed and go to the bathroom. I brush my teeth after I use the toilet and wash my face. I already know I won't be going into work today. I don't want to. I want to enjoy as much alone time with Josh as I can before the storm.
"How do you feel?" I ask him as I get back under the covers. His arm goes around my waist automatically. I'm facing him this time. I study his face. He looks tired. "Did you get any sleep?"
"Here and there," he says.
"Do you feel alright? Should we go back to the hospital?"
He smiles as he touches my cheek with his hand. "I'm fine. Just a little pain, that's all."
I place my hand on his chest and trace it with the tip of my fingers. He is shirtless so I can see a few purple bruises going down his shoulder. He has a cut on his arm. I lean in and press my lips on his collarbone. It's been so long since I've been able to do that. I kiss him again and his arm around me tightens. "Can we stay here all day?" I ask against his neck.
"I wasn't planning on letting you leave," he says making me laugh.
"Good," I say then kiss his neck.
"I already feel ten times better," he says. "Keep doing that and I'll be completely healed in no time."
I laugh as I put my arm around him. "I might leave a mark or two." I joke.
"You can leave as many marks as you want," he says in a deep voice. I can tell he's feeling the same way I do. I can feel his skin burning on my lips. We want each other but I have to remind myself that he's hurt. He's trying to play it off but he must be in a lot of pain if he wasn't even able to sleep.
I pull away and look at him. "I don't want to hurt you."
"It would be worth it, I promise," he says with a crooked grin.
I smile at him. "You're so hot when you're horny."
"So are you, baby," he says, his eyes burning with desire.
"Josh." I warn but he's already pressing his lips against mine. He slides his tongue inside my mouth and we begin to make out. It's so easy to forget about everything in this bed with Josh kissing me. He kisses his way down my chin then down my neck turning me on with every kiss. "Josh," I say again a little breathless and pulling away to look at him. "No sex until you're completely healed."
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He frowns. "That's the worst thing you've ever said to me."
I roll my eyes at him. "I'm serious. I don't want to hurt you." I trace the bruise on his shoulder with my finger. "I promise I'll make it up to you."
He kisses my forehead. "Alright. I'll remind you."
I laugh. "Okay." I pause as I look at his bruises. "It really is a miracle that you didn't break any bones isn't it?"
"It's probably my mother's prayers."
"I'm going to start praying too if it keeps you safe." I look at him. "I don't want anything to ever happen to you. Please be careful when you're out there."
He kisses me. "You don't have to worry about me. I'll always try my hardest to get back to you, Nat."
"Well now I want to cry," I say feeling the knot in my throat.
He chuckles softly. "Why?"
"You're just so sweet," I say looking at him. "And romantic. You always say the cutest things."
"You're my inspiration, baby." He winks at me.
"See?" I shake my head with a smile.
He reaches out and strokes my cheek with the back of his hand. "Can I ask you something?"
I narrow my eyes at him suspiciously. "Sounds serious."
"You know I like asking the serious questions in this relationship."
I smile. "I'm your girlfriend, right?"
He chuckles. "I sure hope you are or else I'd be living with a stranger."
I roll my eyes at him. "Well, you never asked me."
He looks amused as he looks at me. "Be my girlfriend, Natalie."
"That's not really asking." I tease. I'm having way too much fun with this.
"I'm not going to you an option to say no so take it or leave it."
My cheeks hurt from smiling too much. "I'd love to be your girlfriend, Josh."
"Good." He grins then puts his fingers under my chin and raises it so our lips can meet. He sucks on my lower lip as we pull apart, making me laugh.
"What did you want to ask?" I ask sitting up.
He winces in pain as he tries to sit up. I help him adjust the pillows behind his back. "Thank you," He says taking a deep breath.
"Are you sure you're alright?" I ask with a frown.
He reaches for his pills on the nightstand and swallows two with some water. "I'm fine." He insists then he looks at me with a smirk. "I'd love it if you sat on me though."
I feel my ears get hot. I don't know how he still has the ability to make me blush when he says things like that. It's so flattering. "Are you sure?"
"You're not going to hurt me," He says as if reading my mind. I roll my eyes at him but throw my leg over him and sit on his lap, facing him. He places his hands on my hips and grins, looking like a little boy. "I love having you in this position," he says in a sexy voice.
"Are you trying to seduce me?"
"Most definitely, yes." He grins at me. "I'm willing to do anything to get you to have sex with me."
I can already feel myself changing my mind. If he says I'm not going to hurt him then he must mean it, right? He wouldn't have to do any of the work, I'll do it for him. God. I want him so bad. "Just ask your question," I say a bit breathless already. I can feel him hard underneath me. His seduction is working and he knows it.
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"Do you want to have kids?" He asks softly.
That was his big question?
"Sure, yeah."
He frowns. "You're sure, sure?"
"I don't want to have them right now but yes, I've always wanted to have kids. Why do you ask?"
He shrugs. "I don't know. You seemed so relieved when you weren't..."
He's talking about the time I thought I was pregnant and wasn't. I know that he took that very seriously. It's what made him tell me he loves me. I can't believe he's still thinking about it. It was a false alarm but it turned out to be a pivotal moment in our relationship.
"Well, yeah, I was relieved. I mean, it wasn't the right time," I say softly looking into his eyes. "It was before I knew I loved you. Before I knew you loved me."
"So if you got pregnant right now..." he lets the sentence hang.
"I'd freak out," I say with a smile. "But I'd be happy to do it with you."
He smiles looking satisfied with my answer which makes me glad. I don't want him to doubt my love for him. I kiss him slowly then open my eyes and look at him. "I'm still on the pill." I tell him because I want him to know.
"I know," he says.
"Should I stop taking it?" I ask wondering myself. Are we ready to start trying for a family? I'd love to have kids with Josh but I want some time alone with him first. I want to be able to enjoy our relationship freely. I want to be able to hold his hand in public and be with him on our family gatherings. That seems like so far away but I know it might be closer than we think, at least I hope.
"I don't want to make you do something you don't want to."
I smile at him. "I'm very flattered that you want me to carry your babies."
He almost rolls his eyes at me. "I wouldn't want to do it with anybody else."
I kiss him. "Me either." I pull away and look down at his muscular chest. Jesus. He's so yummy. "I think we should wait until after we tell our parents about us."
"I agree." He pauses and I look up at him curiously. "And after you marry me," He says slowly, his eyes searching mine.
My eyes widen in surprise. "What? Are you serious?"
"Of course I am. I told you I wanted to marry you and I meant it." He touches a strand of my hair. "I want it all with you, Natalie. I need you to know that."
I lean in and press my lips against his. I kiss him hard until I run out of breath. Then I put my arms around his neck gently, trying not to hurt him. I bury my face on the crook of his neck. "I love you, Josh," I say. "I'd love to marry you."
He puts his arms around my waist and presses me closer to him. "God, you have no idea how happy you make me."
I smile against his skin. "Only you can get away with bringing up marriage and kids on the same conversation." I tell him and he chuckles. I pull away and look into his eyes. "We need to speak with our parents soon."
He nods. "I know. My mother was telling me she'll be going to Newport this weekend with my dad. I think we should plan to be there as well and speak to them there."
"That's a good idea." I bite my lip. "I'm a bit nervous."
"You don't have to worry about anything. I'll do the talking." He touches my cheek.
"Okay," I say nodding. "We'll do it this weekend. Then we'll find a way to tell Brad."
"It'll be alright," Josh says kissing my hand. "I promise."
I smile nervously, trying my best to not look as scared as I am. I know it won't be easy on any of us but it's necessary. I don't want to hide anymore. I want the world to know that Josh is mine and I am his.
It's time.
Josh leans in and kisses my shoulder. I put my hand on the back of his head as he moves in deeper and kisses my neck. He reaches out and squeezes my boob with his hand making me moan. I know exactly what he's doing but I don't want to stop him. He pulls my blouse off leaving my chest naked in front of him. Then he runs his thumb across my nipple making it hard. He presses me closer to him so he can put it in his mouth. It sends goosebumps all over my body.
I close my eyes and enjoy the pleasure of him kissing me. I feel his tongue all over my chest. "Okay," I say breathless, opening my eyes. "You win."
He kisses my collarbone then grins at me. "I love winning."
I roll my eyes at him then reach down to his boxer briefs. "If you're in pain at any time, tell me. Deal?" My hand finds his hardness and I pull it out through the pee hole.
Josh clenches his jaw, his hands gripping my hips. "Deal." He whispers.
I begin to move my hands on him, making him moan. Then I lean in and use my mouth. I love the way he tastes. I love that he's all mine. I raise my hips then reach out and move my underwear to the side. I come down on him slowly. We both hold our breaths and look at each other as I do it. I move up and down slowly, looking at him to make sure I'm not hurting him. He winces once and I stop. "I'm alright." He promises as his hands tighten around my waist.
I continue to move on top of him and our breaths begin to get heavier. Josh kisses my chest as I move, making me want him even more. I move faster and faster as we both begin to reach climax. "Shit." Josh curses as he comes. I keep moving until I come too. His lips search mine and he kisses me.
So much for waiting until he was completely healed.
"I love you." He whispers against my lips. Then he puts his arms around me and hugs me tightly.
We sit like that for a few minutes as we both try to catch our breaths. Then I hear him grunt and I pull away and look at him. "Dammit, Josh. I told you it wasn't a good idea," I say when I realize he's in pain.
He winces as he moves his arm. "I'm fine."
I shake my head in disapproval as I stand up.
"Where are you going?" He asks fixing his boxers.
"To get some water. Want anything?"
"For you to come back to bed."
I can't help but smile. "I'll only take a minute," I say putting on my blouse. I walk out of the room and get some water from the fridge. I bring some water back to the room then get underneath the covers next to Josh. He puts his arm around me from behind and kisses the back of my head. We're mirroring the position we were in when I woke up. He falls asleep soon after that and I lay there, listening to his breathing, until I fall asleep too.
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