In A Room Filled With People Who Loved Me Is The Best Feeling And I Needed It All Lord Knows I Needed It

Looking Around At Everyone And Thinking Of My Kids And My Life I Realized That I Have No Other Choice But To Beat This

It Was 2 In The Morning When I Woke Up Feeling Sick To My Stomach August Was Sleep Next To Me I Didn't Wanna Wake Him So I Got Out The Bed And Fell To My Knees Because I Could Not Walk And I Began Crawling To My Bathroom I Felt Sick To Stomach

I Was On My Knees Vomiting In The Bathroom Toilet

August Walked In "Babe...Why You Ain't Just Wake Me Up "

"August Im Okay Go Back To Sleep"I Said

He Held My Hair As I Continue Throwing Up

"Get It All Out...Its Okay"He Said Rubbing Me On My Back

After I Finish Throwing Up He Help Me Up Off The Floor Helped Me Brush My Teeth And Carried Me Back To The Bed

Hes Been So Good To Me He's Putting His Life On Hold Just To Stay Home And Take Care Of Me And I Didn't Even Ask Him Too

As He Laid Me In The Bed I Looked Him In His Eyes "I Couldn't Get Through This With Out You You Been My Side Through All This"

"Ima Stay Down Ima Take Care You…Ima Be The Best Husband I Can Be I Vowed Too...I Love The Shit Outta You…Every Day When I Wake Up And I See You Laying Next To Me Or Hear You Giggle I Just Fall More In Love With You I Still Gotta Ask My Self How Can One Woman Be So Perfect"He Said

"I Want You To Make A Another Promise To Me"I Said

"…What"He Said

"Promise That We Gonna Grow Old Together And Even When I Have Wrinkles And I Grey Hair That You Will Still Love Me Just As Much As You Do Now"I Said

He Smiled At Me "I Promise"

"Make Love To Me"I

Said

He Leaned In And Kiss Me "Na You Talkin My Talk Mama"

And Got On Top Of Me And Made The Sweetest Love To Me

A Few Weeks Later My Hair Was Falling Out Even More

And I Became A Bit More Sicker

Laying In Bed Shivering Cause I Had Chills Just One Of The Many Side Effects To Strong Ass Chemotherapy

My Mother Wrapped In Two Blankets

"Mommy Im Trying Too Fight This I Am"I Whined Still Shivering

"I Know You Are Miss Thang…I Know"She Said As She Held Me In Her Arms

"If I Could Trade Places With You I Will Do In A Heartbeat…Just So I Won't Have To Watch My Child Suffering"She Said

"..Do You Know I Haven't Heard Or Seen My My Father Since I Told Everyone I Was Sick"I Said

"I Figured That Much…Hes Not Good With These Kinds Of Things"She Said

"Ma...He's A Doctor He Should Be Use To This"I Said

"Its Different When The Patient Is Your Baby"She Said

If Hes Leaving Me Again He Can Stay Gone This Time Your Daughter Tell You She Has Cancer And You Just Leave And Dont Call Or Come By

Seems Like Thing Was Getting Worse With Me August Wasn't Working Cause He Was At Home Taking Care Of Me

We Had Money In The Bank But We Also Had Bills And Not To Mention All My Medical Bills That Was Real Expensive

August Was Paying Bills One Night Besides Me And The Look On His Face Told Me Our Account Wasn't Right

I Slowly Sat Up And Said "Just Call Up Your Manger And Get Booked For A Few Shows And While You At It Get Back In The Studio And Get Started On Your Album"

"If I Do All That Who Gon Be Here Taking Care Of You…We Fine We Might Have To Make A Few Adjustments Around Here And Tighten Our Budget But We Fine"He Said

"August All You Do Is Sing Around Here All Day Anyways…Im Okay…We Have To Think About Ayden And Azian…Now Ayden Tuition Is 100,000 Dollars"I Said

"Its What?!"August Said

"Its Yearly…Besides Look How Smart He Is Now Ayden Can Hold A Conversation Better Than Any Five Year Old You Know And He Is Only Three"I Said

"For 100,000 Dollars He Better Be The Next Bill Gates Fa All That Damn Money…What Kind Of Husband Leaves They Sick Wife At Home To Care For Her Self…"He Asked Me

"August I Need You To Work You Got Take Care Of Us And I Be Damn If I Have Cancer And Be Broke.…If Im Losing My Hair At Least Lemme Have My Versace Shoes"I Joked

He Smiled At Me And Said "Ight I Called My Label And Tell Em Im Ready To Work You Just Get Betta"He Said

I Smiled "I Will"

I Don't Wanna Let Me Being Sick Hold Him Back From Life He Should Still Be Able To Sing Because Thats What He Loves To Do He Has Did So Much For Me I Don't Wanna Take Anything Else From Him He Deserves To Have Some Kinda Happiness In This Rain We Going Through

So This Week August Got With His Team And He Was Back At Work

Tuesday Evening Was Here And I Was Feeling A Little Better..I Felt Strong Enough To Make My Self A Nice Hot Steaming Cup Of Tea

And I Was Drinking Tea While Looking At My Degrees That Was Just Sitting Around Collecting Dust I Hated I Was So Sick That I Couldn't Even Do Things That I Always Wanted To Do

I Felt Like My Was Whole Life Was Just Passing Me By And Im Just Sitting Here

Everyone Had Something Going On With Their Lives Except Aziah Alsina

Vanessa Walked In With Roses

She Smiled And Said "Look What The Deliver Guy Brought Over"

"Are Those For Me"I Asked As I Smiled

"Read The Card And See"She Said

I Opened The Card And It Read And It Said "Just To Let You Know That Even When You Alone You Neva Alone You Always Got Me Beautiful Even When I'm A Million Miles Away I'm Still Thinking Of You No Matter How Far I Am

-Love Yungin

I Smiled And Looked At The Beautiful Roses

"He Is So Thoughtful And Sweet I Wish My Man Was Like That"Vanessa Said

Than I Notice A Bruise On The Side Of Her Neck .

"What Happened To Your Neck"I Asked Her

"My Neck..Oh I Think I Hurt It While Working Out Or Sumthin"She Said

"Working Out Huh?"I Said

"Yes...It Will Be Fine…I'll Put Some Ice On It…Azian Is Having A Nap And Ayden Is In The Back Playing His Game When Azian Wakes Up I Will Give Them A Bath Read Em Story And Put Him To Sleep…Im Off Tomorrow..But Im Coming In Anyways To Help You Out"She Said As She Smiled

"Thank You Vanessa I Appreciate It"I Said

"No Problem I Go Get That Ice" She Said

Vanessa Was Young Early Twenties Sweet Real Sweet Female From Texas Houston And Was Real Good With My Kids Ayden Loves Him Some Vanessa She Was Very Professional And Always Came To Work On Time And Sometimes She Worked Overtime Just Because She Wanted To Help Me

Its So Hard To Find A Good Nanny And Vanessa Was My On Call Nanny I Could Trust Her With My Kids

Sometimes She Showed Up To Work With Scars And Bruises With Wack Ass Excuses

Her Boyfriend Was Very Possessive And Controlling And He Would Call Vanessa All Day At Work Maybe Hes The One Giving Her All These Scars And Bruises