You spent that week with them, and slowly felt your feelings for both of them growing. Sam said no emotions, but it was harder than you thought. They care about you, and you them. You eventually killed the demon, but it wasn't yours. You realized that hunting is something you want to continue. After much arguing from Bobby, you joined the brothers on the road trip. It became difficult to be apart from them, but joining up made it easier. You almost always ended up with Sam while in the hotels (most likely Dean trying to set you two up). Though you didn't mind, you felt the connection growing between you two. Now that he knew that you were keeping secrets, it was going to ruin everything.

Mabye I should just run back to Bobby's. You think to yourself as Dean drove you back to the bunker, Sam in the passenger. The ride was much more quiet than usual. No music from the radio, no chatter between the boys, just utterly awkward silence. You glance over at Sam and see he was watching you from the corner of his eye, then you look at the rear - view mirror to see Dean watching you as well.

You sigh "I give up, say what you want but say something. Between the constant observation and the awkward silence, I'm feeling like I'm in the middle of an interigation gone wrong."

Sam and Dean glance at each other before Sam turns in his seat and locks eyes with you very seriously "I've been trying to hold off on this, but I need to get it out. Was that demon telling the truth?" He asked, going from a serious to soft in a second flat.

"Yes..." you answer, looking at your feet to avoid eye contact.

Sam grunts as he sits back in his seat and runs his fingers through his hair "Damn it ( Y / N ), tell us what's going on! What could be so bad you can't tell us?"

You become angry "Beacause I didn't want you to treat me differently! I knew if you knew that I was raped and abused you would become more protective and less relaxed!"

Your face paled when you realized what you just said. Both boys' faces instantly paled as well. Sam turned to look at you with concern.

"Did you just say you were raped?"

You bury your face in your hands, not wanting to continue because you knew you would cry, which you hated doing.

"(Y/n). I didn't realize that was what bothered you so badly. The nightmares weren't just about your mom..."

"I didn't want you to look at me like you are now! Like I'm some broken little baby bird that needs help! I wanted you too see me for me, not a damaged little girl with issues."

Dean grumbled something as Sam turned back around "You are family to us already. For two years you have been hunting with us and for two years you have been family. Blood related or not." Sam sighed.

"Well I'm sorry I never told you guys, but now that it's out, what are you gonna do?"

Sam opens his mouth to speak, but is stopped by Dean "I ain't no shrink, but I think we need to talk about this (y/n)."

You and Sam both sit back in your seats as Dean turns on the radio. It starts playing Heart-Shaped Box by Nirvana. You sit quietly and stare out the window, slowly beginning to hum along.

*Time skip brought to you by the perfect bitchface*

You make it to the bunker and get out, still slightly limping, and go inside. You ignore the boy as you enter your room, locking it behind you. Sitting on the bed,you take a deep breath before bursting into tears.

You began thinking to yourself, cursing yourself. "Sam seemed so angry, and Dean was completely quiet! The probably can't even look at me right now! Its not like I chose it! How am I ever going to get them to trust me ever again?!"

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and you may hate me... and I have no picture that can describe how they are feeling so NO PICTURE FOR YOU!