Previously on Chapter 16

"Pennywise can kill me if he wants to... I give up..." I said. I turn around and run away from them. I just ignore their yells and pleads for me to come back. I keep running, not caring where I'm going... not caring the aching feeling on my feet... and definitely not caring if I'm going to die.

Y/N P.O.V

I keep running, not realizing I've entered the woods. My knees finally gave out and I stumble upon a root that sticks out of the ground. I fall forwards and my stomach.

At this rate, I don't feel any pain... my whole body feels numb as I start to cry. I bury my face into my arms as I cry.

Why does life have to be so cruel on me? What did I do to deserve all this? Am I not allowed to be happy? Questions after questions kept on jumbling up in my mind... yet none of them have answers as they only makes my head dizzy.

Exhaustion starts to consume me. I close my eyes and slowly let everything around me turns dark, as I passed out on cold hard ground.

Time-skip

I open my eyes and realize it's starting to get darker. I let out a sigh and get up from the ground. I try to stop myself from crying again as I thought about what had happened earlier.

I hear a crack and turn around, to see no one there. I let out slow breathing. "Calm down, Y/N... there's nothing there. You're just hallucinating..." I said to myself.

"Or are you?" Someone said. I turn around and come face to face with the clown. My eyes widened as I take steps backward. He smirks at me and walks towards me.

"Time to float, Y/N..." he said. I just look at him in terror. But then my mind went back to what had happened with the gang. How they have split apart.

I've got nothing left... my parents died. The people I thought was family... now is falling apart. I've got nothing left in this world. The world didn't want me to be happy. I don't want to be here... not anymore.

Tears streams down my cheeks. I shake my head and wipe my tears. I've got nothing to lose anymore. I've got nothing to hold onto anymore.

"I will float with you... or better... you can kill me instead... you can feed on me to your fill..." I said, looking at him with no emotion. He looks at me in surprise, then he starts to laugh and outstretch his hand.

"Come, my dear..." he said. I walk towards him and place my hand on top of his. He smiles at me and place his hand on my face. Then everything went dark once again.

Author P.O.V

The Losers Club are no longer together. But they all still care for Y/N's well being. That's why every single one of them are trying their very best to find Y/N.

As the day goes by... it is now night time. The split group decides its best to head home. No matter how reluctant they felt, they know it's too dangerous to be out in the open.

Bill and Richie are the two that felt the most lost. As they both are in love with Y/N. They'll do anything in a heart beat if they know they could get Y/N back with them. They regret fighting with each other. If only they don't take it to far to the point they fought physically... Y/N wouldn't have left.

They know how much pain Y/N's feeling. How much Y/N struggles after what she's been through in the past. Her parents death... in result, shutting all the people around them.

Bill P.O.V

I finally reached home. In all honesty... I still want to find Y/N. I head straight to my room. My parents are acting differently after Georgie went missing.

I let myself fall onto the bed. I turn to lay on my back as I stare at the ceiling. Y/N's smile appear in front of me. When I blink it turns into a face that I wish I can stop from happening. Her tears... the look of pain in her eyes. I wish I could've prevent it... but I know it's my fault. She cried because the Loser Club is falling apart.

My mind went to the day Y/N told us why she chose to keep her distance from everyone. It was also the day I realize my feelings for her.

Flashback

We just finished swimming. Now we are sitting in circle, facing one another. We talked about random things that would come in mind. Until eventually I chose to ask a question that have been eating me out lately.

I turn to look at Y/N, who is sitting next to me. "Y-Y/N..." I said. Curse my stuttering! Why can't I just talk normally. Gosh!! This is so annoying. But I'm thankful that none of my friends judge me for it.

"Yeah, Bill?" She said, turning to look at me. "W-Why d-did you keep y-your distance f-from e-e-everyone?" I said. She looks at me for a while. I started to regret asking her that question as it seems to be a touchy subject.

I was about to tell her that it's okay, that she don't have to answer me... when she starts talking. "It was because I was scared..." she said. "Why?" I hear Richie asked, looking at her in confusion.

She lets out a sigh. "When I was 5... I lost both of my parents. I saw their death right in front of my eyes. My dad got shot in the head by a group of man in black..." she said, looking down. I can see her body shaking lightly. She seems to be trying to hold back from crying.

"T-Then... when m-my mother a-and I are o-o-on the run... a c-car came c-crashing to us... sending o-our car rolls o-on the road... a-and my m-mom... she... s-she..." she didn't get to finish her sentence as she burst into tears.

She lets out choked sob. I wrap my arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer to my side. She leans her head against my shoulder. I caress her hair softly, trying my best to calm her down.

I can feel my heart starts to beat at a rapid pace, as I held her close. At this moment... I want nothing but to keep Y/N safe and happy. But why am I feeling this way? Why do I feel very protective of her. Then that's when I realize...

I have fallen in love with Y/N...

End of Flashback

Tears streams down my cheeks as I recall the times I have with Y/N. "Y-Y/N... I... I c-can't l-l-lose you... I love you... w-where are you, Y/N..." I said, crying to myself.

Richie P.O.V

I cried to myself as I clutch Y/N's photo in my hand. It's a photo we took when we went to an arcade. In a photo booth.

Flashback

"Prepare to lose!!!" I said, rapidly punching the button as I duel with Y/N on street fighter. "You are the one that's going to lose, trashmouth!!" She said, laughing.

In the end, I'm the one who loses. I pout and cross my arms. I can feel Y/N poking my cheek. "Aww... is wittle Wichie sad? Does he wants a smoochie-smoochie?" She said in baby voice, making me blush.

"Stop!" I said, pushing her hand away to stop her from poking my cheek. She giggles and raise her hands in the air. Then she turns her head. I can see her eyes lit up.

"A photo booth! Come on!!" She said, and start to pull me along. I stumble a little, making her laugh. She insert the coin and pulls me inside. We ended up taking a couple of pictures. But one specific photo is my favorite. It's a photo of us, with her arm around my shoulder and her cheek pressed with mine... and right at this very moment I realize...

I'm in love with Y/N...

End of Flashback

I choke a sob as I hold the photo close to my chest. I turn to lay on my side as I cried softly.

"I-I love you... Y/N... c-come back... I-I'm so... so s-sorry... because of Bill and I got into a fight... you c-chose to l-leave..." I cried out. I can't lose Y/N... I love her so much. I don't wanna lose her.

Bill&Richie P.O.V

I'll stop at nothing to find you and I swear that I will never let you go again... I love you, Y/N...