'Men fear Death, as children fear to go in the dark; and as that natural fear in children is increased with tales, so is the other,'

- Francis Bacon, Essays

Chapter Three

Azelie lay awake, just staring up at the roof of her bedroom. She stayed completely still, trying to push all the thoughts that were running around in her mind away. She didn't want to shut her eyes, frightened of the dreams that waited for her to fall asleep again so they could take over her mind for the second time that night. She had been woken up from her own screaming around midnight, tears running down her cheeks as she slept, the nightmares exploiting every memory that she had and using it against her.

She turned her head slightly to the left to look at her alarm clock which sat on her bedside table, the luminous green light of the text telling her that she had been lying awake for three hours. She let out a small sigh, her gaze floating back up to the roof as she prayed in her head that the night would pass quickly. Her eyelids felt heavy, trying to pull her eyelids shut, but she couldn't shut her eyes, not even for a second. She was so tired that if she shut her eyes, even just for a second, she would fall asleep, and the dreams would start once more.

Azelie gave up trying to remain still. She pushed herself up on her bed so that she was sitting up straight. Her left hand stretched out to the switch of the lamp which stood on her bedside table, the switch clicking on, the light instantly lighting up her bedroom. Her hand reached out and grabbed the book she had been reading. She found the page that she had been reading from and started to read hoping that it would be enough to keep her awake.

As Azelie read her book, she found that instead of the book waking her up, it made her more tired. Eventually, she gave into the tiredness. She closed her eyes, letting them close for a second. She took a deep breath in, as she gently fell back to sleep.

Azelie slowly walked down the dark hallway, the floor boards creaking with every step she took, the sound echoing around the dark, old house. Her heart began to beat quickly as she got a sniff of her aunt's strong perfume, suddenly remembering where she was. Light shone through the windows surrounding the front door of the hallway she was walking up. She heard a light sobbing from the living room. Azelie peered inside the room, instantly spotting her aunt sitting in the chair where her husband once sat. Her aunt sat crying in the chair, her greying hair flowing down her shoulders and on to the black dress she was wearing. She had just come from her husband's funeral; the one that Azelie had been banned from.

"Anna?" Azelie whispered - her voice barely audible, scared to disrupt her aunt and attract attention to herself. When she got no reply from her aunt, she said her name again, this time louder, her voice stronger. "Anna," She got a reply this time, her aunt's head quickly snapped up to see Azelie, her dead blue eyes staring hard into her niece, the tears instantly drying up.

"What do you want?" Her aunt spat as she pushed herself out of her husband's old chair.

"I wanted to see if there was anything I could do," Azelie answered, her voice returning to its quiet level, fear and regret beginning to take over.

"Anything you can do? You can get out of my fucking sight!" Her aunt screamed, running after her. She ran out of the living room and into the hallway, her aunt not far behind. She scampered up the stairs, trying to get to her room as fast as she could before her aunt could catch her. Her aunt ran after, screaming at Azelie as she did, her words acting like daggers on Azelie.

Suddenly, Azelie tripped over a step, and went flying down on to her knees, just managing to catch herself on the stairs so she wouldn't fall down. Her aunt closed the gap between the two, her bony hand reaching out and grabbing on to Azelie's ankle. Azelie's blood ran cold as she realised what was happening next. Her aunt yanked her ankle down, her head hitting on the step as she fell down the steps, falling down past her aunt, screaming in pain as she fell. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she hit the ground, pain stinging around her entire body. Her aunt charged down the stairs, her feet thumping hard against the floor. Azelie tried to climb to her feet to run, but her legs just gave in over her weight. She had fallen on her back, and the pain made it almost impossible for Azelie to move. She tried to roll away, trying every motion possible to get as far away from her Aunt as she could, but it was useless. Her aunt walked slowly up to Azelie, a grin lighting up her face. Her foot struck Azelie's stomach, Azelie doubling over in pain on the floor as her aunt delivered another blow, just kicking Azelie wherever she could.

"It's your fault!" She screamed, anger filling her voice as she kicked her niece again, "Your fault he's gone! It's your fault he's dead!" Tears streamed uncontrollably down her face, as she took every beating, screaming in pain every time her aunt kicked her body. "It's your fault they are gone!"

Azelie thrashed about on the floor, screaming for help, tears running down her face, black blotchy bruises forming all over her body. With each kick and word her aunt threw Azelie's way, she began to believe her words, believing that it was all really her fault.

"Azelie!"

She watched as her aunt turned away, waking slowly up the stairs, the floor creaking underneath her weight.

"Azelie wake up! It's just a dream!"

She lay there, trying to ignore the pain that was building up inside of her as she crawled up into a ball at the bottom of the stairs, silent tears rolling down her cheeks. Outwards, Azelie was quiet, trying not to attract her aunts attention; but inside she was screaming in pain, praying for death to take it all away.

Suddenly, Azelie jumped up from her bed, reality stepping in as she was woken up from her own screams. Her brown eyes were wide, tears were rolling down her cheeks as she realised that it was just a dream, just another memory replaying itself.

"Azelie, are you alright?" a voice questioned. Azelie barely had time to look before a pair of arms wrapped themselves around her, trying to squeeze her as tightly as they could. It was Ted.

"I'm fine," She lied, her heart still thumping hard against her ribs as she tried to catch her breath.

"No, you're not Azelie! That was twice in one night! I was about to come though the first time but then it stopped - I thought you were alright again," Ted replied, his voice low, not believing Azelie. He un-wrapped his arms from around her, so he could look at her. "Do you want to talk about it?" She shook her head in reply, not wanting to worry Ted. Her head span as she tried to grab hold of reality, trying to convince herself that it was all just a dream.

"No, it's fine... I'll just talk to Dr. Robinson on Sunday," Azelie replied, looking away from Ted and over to her alarm clock, reading the time as she realised that she still had three hours until her school started.

"Do you want an earlier appointment? You've never had two in one night," Ted questioned, worrying about Azelie. He had begun to freak out when she didn't wake up right away from her nightmare, the screams of terror breaking his heart into two as he had tried to shake her awake.

"That's because I usually just stay awake," Azelie replied sadly, blaming herself for falling back asleep. "I'll just wait until Sunday. Honestly Ted, don't worry - I'll be fine," she replied, trying to smile at her uncle to reassure him, but Ted picked up on the fact that the small smile she sent him didn't reach her eyes - the eyes that were still full of terror from her nightmare.

"That's easier said than done," he replied, not wanting to bug her about in anymore. He knew that if he didn't drop the subject, she would get angry and frustrated. If she needed to talk about it, she knew she could go to him. He smiled weakly back at her, praying that she was alright, that she wasn't just saying that to get him off her back.

"Are you going back to bed?" She questioned, her heart beat beginning to drop down to its normal pulse. Ted shook his head, answering her question. "Okay, I'm going to go out for a run," she replied. Ted climbed off her bed, sending her a look of sympathy as he did.

"You're sure you're alright - you're not just saying that you're fine to get me off your back?" He questioned, his brown eyes looking into Azelie's.

"I'm fine, " She lied, "Honestly, I'll be okay," She added, knowing that she wouldn't be okay, that one day, everything would catch up with her and she would be left alone once again.

Azelie ran as fast as she could, her heart beating hard in her chest as her lungs begged for more and more air. Her feet hit the road harder as she ran further and further away from her house, barely outrunning her thoughts. Music blasted loudly through her headphones, the noise of the dance music pushing her on. Only when she was running would Azelie get this kind of freedom from her thoughts, she almost felt as if she could be anyone she wanted, do anything she liked, but eventually she would grow tired, and the thoughts that plagued her mind would return, beating down any hopes she had of escaping them permanently. She ran from about an hour, jogging around the area to put off the thoughts catching up with her, but eventually her legs began to shake and her stomach began to turn from pushing herself to hard and she was forced to jog lightly back to the house.

She ran inside the house, her gaze falling to the floor as she jogged up the stairs, not wanting to relive any of the memories attached to the pictures that hung on the wall. She stripped out of her joggers and T-shirt as she jumped into the shower, letting the hot water sooth her aching muscles. After her shower, she got ready for school, drying her long brown hair as she picked out a pair of jeans and a top to wear, covering it up with a thick cardigan to keep warm in the chilly weather. She pleated her hair into a single plat, not really caring about how it looked, simply pleating her hair to keep it out of the way as she walking back into the bathroom to hang up her towels and brush her teeth.

Azelie ran downstairs, dumping her bag near the front doo. She walked into the kitchen and pouring herself a cup of coffee, needing all the caffeine she could get her hands on to make it through the day. She made herself a piece of toast, ignoring Ted's quick glances at her, as if he was waiting for her to break down and crumble. She downed the coffee and ate the toast followed by Azelie quickly saying her goodbyes to Ted, just wanted to get out of the house.

She walked down her street to her school, hoping that Ted would move past the entire thing by the time she got home. She hated people worrying about her, especially Ted. Worrying made them care more about her, and that was the last thing she wanted.

Azelie walked out of the cold air and into the school, shivering slight from the wind as she did. She dug her timetable out of her bag, trying to figure out where her first class was. It took Azelie ten minutes to remember where the history class room has been but she got there on time, taking the same chair she had been allocated the day previously, the girl with the pink hair asleep on her desk. Light snores filled the air surrounding the pink girl, causing Azelie to laugh a little, wondering slightly how the girl could just fall asleep on her desk.

The teacher suddenly entered the class room as the bell rang, mumbling incoherent things to himself. Azelie automatically picked her bag up from underneath her desk and began to dig through it to find her history books. People started to pour into the room, taking their seats, and yet the girl continued to sleep. Azelie noticed that the teacher was getting ready to begin the lesson, scowling a little when he saw people sleeping on their desks. She leaned over to her left, stabbing the girl with the pointy side of her pencil. The girl immediately jumped up, waking up from her slumber. The girl frowned over at Azelie, dislike for her growing inside for the girl for waking her up from her sleep.

"Detention!" A voice shouted from the class room as the grumpy teacher woke up a boy who was sleeping on his desk. The boy jumped up. All wide eyed before realising that he had just landed himself in detention for sleeping. The pink-haired girl sent a smile over to Azelie, realising why Azelie had woken her up. She stretched her arm over to Azelie, a friendly smile playing on her lips.

"Thanks for waking me up! I'm Kelly," She smiled, introducing herself to Azelie. Azelie shook her hand, and sent a smile back to the girl.

"No problem, I'm Azelie,"

"Nice to meet you! Cute name - it's French right?" Kelly questioned, her deep blue eyes lighting up slightly as she spoke.

"Yeah, it's French for flower," she replied, noticing that Kelly never seemed to have a smile off her face, even when she was sleeping, she was smiling.

"Cool, my mom is Canadian and she tried to teach me some French - never again! I ended up only learning the swear words!" Kelly laughed. Azelie was about to reply when somebody else over heard.

"Excuse me Miss O'Donald and Miss Ryans - am I interrupting?" He sneered, shouting over at them from across the room. Azelie shook her head at the teacher, her throat running dry before hastily writing down what the teacher had written on the board. Kelly rolled her eyes at the teacher as she pulled her jotter out of her bag and continuing on with her doodles from the other day, every so often smiling over at Azelie, remembering how good it was to speak to a girl instead of the two idiot boys she hung out with.

The class passed slowly, Azelie hating every second of history, wondering how anyone could ever think that it was useful to learn - she had practically learned it all when she was seven! When the bell rang, Azelie jumped out of her seat, shoving her books into her bag before running out of the classroom, forgetting all about the girl she had left behind while trying to remember where her next class was.

The rest of her classes were uneventful, most of them Azelie just sat at the back of class, trying to fight the tiredness that hung over her like a cloud. The bell for lunch finally ran and Azelie escaped her math's class, barely managing to keep her eyes open. She walked into the canteen, for lunch, the smell of school food hanging heavily in the air, turning her stomach slightly. She lined up for food, grabbing a cup of coffee and a ham and salad sandwich. Azelie sat down at an empty table, not caring if people sat next to her or not as she downed her coffee, not bothering to even add any sugar. She was munching into her rubbery ham sandwich when somebody placed their tray of food down next to her. She looked up to see a smiling Kelly sitting down beside her.

"Hey! How are you finding Bellingham?" she questioned as she picked up her fork and began to stab it into the grey mush that was on her plate. Her bright pink hair was all wavy, flowing down her back. The colour clashed with her pale skin tone, her blue eyes shining brightly.

"It's fine - but it's far too cold," Azelie replied, wondering why the girl had chosen to sit next to her. Where were the two guys she had first seen her with, why wasn't she sitting next to them? Suddenly her questioned was answered by two guys joining their table, dropping their overflowing trays of food on the table.

"Scaring the new girl so soon, Kelly?" One questioned, his hazel eyes lighting up as Kelly stuck her tongue out at him in reply. The guy's gaze flickered to Azelie. She instantly recognized him as the guy who had called her hot as she took in his dark black hair.

"I'm not scaring her!" Kelly replied, rolling her eyes slightly, "Azelie - this doofus is Alex," Kelly smiled, pointing over to the guy who had spoken. He looked over at Azelie, flashing her a smile as he began to eat his food, "And his partner in crime over there is Cole," Kelly added, introducing them. Azelie looked at Cole, recognizing him from the other day. His soft, curling brown hair and his green eyes hadn't been something Azelie had forgotten. Cole looked up at Azelie, smiling softly as if to say hello, before looking over at Kelly.

"I didn't say anything!" Cole replied, his voice deep, referring to his 'partner in crime' title, holding his hands up in the air.

"So? If Alex is in trouble, you're usually involved to!" Kelly pointed out, Azelie feeling increasingly like an outsider from the group. She considered just leaving the table, not managing to keep up with the conversation.

"And you're usually the one leading us into trouble!" Alex spoke up, swallowing a mouth full of food while raising his eyebrows at Kelly.

"You're both too easily influenced!" Kelly concluded, an evil grin playing on her lips slightly. The two boys who looked like they had both walked out of some kind of magazine just shrugged at her conclusion, agreeing with Kelly so they could get on with eating their food. "So, you're from Florida, right?" Kelly questioned, turning to her left to face Azelie. Azelie nodded replying to her question. She opened her mouth to reply when Alex decided to join in.

"Did you know Mickey Mouse?" He questioned, his mouth still filled with food, crumbs spitting out all over to table.

"ALEX! How many times do we have this conversation! Eat with your mouth empty!" Kelly shouted, hitting Alex on the head. Both boys looked at each other trying to figure out what she meant, her words replaying over in her head.

"Kel - don't you mean talk with your mouth empty?" Cole questioned, keeping his laughter down, his eyes lighting up as he did. Realization crashed down on Kelly as she realised what she had said.

"You know what I meant!" She replied, rolling her eyes at Cole. "Anyway, I don't want to see your mushed up food all gross in your mouth!" Kelly said, turning to Alex. He almost automatically opened his mouth to reveal the remainder of his food, causing Kelly to squirm and scream in her chair, nobody else in the canteen bothering to turn around. Kelly jumped up and started hitting Alex, her tiny fists probably feeling like raindrops on Alex's strong shoulders.

"Are they always like this?" Azelie questioned, turning to face Cole.

"Like what?" he smiled, a little confused to what Azelie meant. His green eyes stared into Azelie's golden brown eyes, taking in their unusual colour.

"Crazy," she simply replied, a grin playing on her lips.

"Always - but all the best people are!" he smirked, "You will get used to it, hell, they will probably drag you down to their level!" Azelie laughed a little, turning back to Kelly and Alex.