Regret

That's what I'm feeling right now.

How can I be so stupid?

I put my pleasure ahead of my baby.

Jen was just a fling to me.

She didn't meant anything.

How can my baby think that I'll chose that Jen?

I'll always choose my baby.

Even if I get married with my love of my life, I'll always and always choose her.

It's better to die then to be without her.

I shouted on Jen, not her.

A few minutes later, Jayden came, he was glaring at me.

"You're elder, that's why I didn't hit you. How can you say these things to Mona?" He asks.

I tighten my fist with rage.

Does no one really know me here?

"How can you think that I can shout on Mona?" I ask my voice a bit high.

"I know you can't, but why in front of Mona, you know she's like a glass doll. All she needs is love and care, she's insecure, your shouting on Jen made her more insecure and heart broken.

And don't ever take that voice with me" he says sternly.

Jayden had always been rebellious kid, including Jaxon, they are very close to each other.

I hung my head low in guilt.

I'm sorry my baby.

"What can I do?" I say softly, like a lost child.

When Mona was born,I was very happy that finally I got a sister to protect and play with.

I loved her more than anyone in the family. I used to hold her cute little hands and legs and play with her.

I used to touch her hair,which were so soft, like cotton.

Her cute chubby cheeks and most importantly her smile was something which took my heart away.

When she was taken away, I neither cried nor showed any pain.

I found an escape in my whoring ways from this pain, and guilt.

Guilt that I was not been able to save her.

Guilt that they took her away.

Now she came back, all I wanted to do was hug her and hid her from the world.

But I was afraid.

The though of her going away was were scary, yet my nightmare came true.

She's going away, from me. From us.

But I'll bring her back.

I would fall on my knees to bring her back.

"It's decided" I say suddenly.

"What?" He asks.

"I'm gonna crash her stay with our grandparents" I say.

He raises an eyebrow.

"And you think that grandpa will let you go anyway near her, once she tells him about this?" He asks.

"I will accept this challenge and will bring her back" I promise.

No one can keep me away from her.

"All the best, call me if you come from there in one piece and alive. But for now, I'm booking a funeral in your name" he says.

Be ready for a great day ahead.

You'll forgive me.

I know, you will.

I'm coming baby.

"Welcome home, baby girl" pa says spreading his arms.

I smile and hug him tight.

My nose flare as I sniff his smell.

His body warmth, giving me comfort and happiness.

Nothing is best than warm hugs.

We break the hug.

He is grinning so wide, his eyes reflecting, happiness.

I wish him to stay like this, forever.

He kisses my forehead.

"Grandpa" I heard a wince behind me.

Monday and rest of my brothers are standing with a pout.

Pa rolls his eyes, but smile at them.

"Today I'm very happy because my angel has come in our house for the first time" he says.

I smile.

He then again opens his arms.

And my baby brothers hug him.

"Come on" he then says and we all go inside.

We see maa is grinning at us.

"My babies" she says.

We all run and hug her.

She laughs.

"I missed you too" she says, her voice filled with joy.

"Well, come on I made some cookies" maa says.

My eyes widen with excitement.

"Yaaaay" I say jumping while clapping my hands.

Everyone laugh at me.

"The who reach first will get most of the cookies" Monday says as he takes for a run and then everyone behind him.

"Nooooo" I cry as I run.

But my bad luck, I reach last.

They all are attacking the cookies.

I make a crying face.

I cross my arms with a pout.

"Awww, babygirl ignore these pigs, I've left some for you." Pa says keeping his hand on my shoulder.

I grin at him.

"Thank you pa" I say as I eat my cookies.

We were laughing and talking when the door bell rang.

"I'll go, I'll go" I say and run toward the door.

"Careful" I hear pa saying from behind.

As I go and open the door, my smile vanishes away as I see that Ethan is standing there with a smile on his face and with a small bag pack.

"Hey baby" he says.

I nod, stepping aside for him to enter.

He enter, was about to say something, when ma comes.

"Ethan, my child, what are you doing here?" She says as she hugs him.

"I thought to also come here stay for the weekend" he says but his eyes are on me.

I quickly turn away, Ethan has hurt me, indirectly.

But why am I been like this?

Just because his girlfriend said few things to me.

He didn't say anything to me.

I've met them after a long time, why am I wasting time in fighting.

Action speaks louder than words.

His actions are more important than his words.

His words can't hurt me, but he can, I mean his behaviour.

But the little can have some fun, right?

I mean my one brother can chase me a little, right?

This will be fun.

I small smirk comes on the side of my lip.

Let the fun begin, baby.

Oh god, I'm spending too much time with my brothers, now I'm also saying baby!

Ahhhh!

I shake my head.

Anyways, let's gooooooooo

"Oh really, yes, come on, join us" ma says as she takes Ethan with her.

I'm gazing at their retrieving figures with a smile.

"Ethan, Ethan, Ethan, nothing can take me away from you, not even you, but you've to pay for all my tears" I say with a smirk.

As I go to the kitchen, Ethan is greeting everyone.

"What an unexpected surprise" Sam says.

"Yes, I was free, so I thought to spend the time here." He says still looking at me.

I look at him too, his eyes showing sadness, guilt and love for me.

I feel my face soften.

I will forgive him but he has to put a little effort.

$$$$

I'm having so much fun here, me and my brothers are playing hide and seek, ice and water, and right now we'll are playing monopoly.

"And now I've two houses" Jason says.

"You're cheating" Sam says.

"No, I'm not"

"Uhuuu, yes you're" Monday says.

"Ok, now it's my turn" I say as I roll the dice.

7.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

"Noooo" I whisper yell as my hat stopped at GO TO JAIL

My baby brothers are now laughing at me.

"Fine, fine, I'll be back" I say, thumping my chest.

"My turn" pa says.

He rolls the dice, it ends on community chest.

"Let's see" he says as he picks up the card.

"Go to the jail" he read it out loud.

Then everybody laughs.

"Welcome to the club pa" I say, bowing a little.

We play and laugh till the end of the game.

I'm now standing, outside the house, watching sky, full of stars.

The moon is very lucky, although he doesn't have his own light, but he has stars with him.

Stars that support him and shine for him, just like a family.

I always though that I'm the unlucky one without a family, but now I'm the happiest, even with fights I love them the most.

They've now became my life, my everything.

As I was thinking all this, I feel someone beside me, it turn, it was Ethan.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" He asks softly gazing up towards the sky.

"Yes" I say.

And then suddenly he goes on his knees.

I gasp.

My heartbeat racing already.

What is he doing?

Maybe he's going all Christian Grey!!

Oh, shut up!

But since in the movie meant surrender or whatever it is.

He is surrending to me, like I'm his queen or something.

His head is down. My heart is aching seeing him like this.

He's my elder, what is he doing, what am I doing.

Let my plan go to poo.

"Et--an, w--what are you doing?" I ask.

"I'm sorry, baby, I'm so so so sorry. That was meant Jen, not you. I can never scold you, I'll die before I hurt you. I'm sorry, sorry" he says, his tears starting to fall.

Like this mine did too, I can't see him hurt or any of my family member like this.

A sob leaves my throat. I too kneel down.

"No, don't be sorry, I'm sorry for not believing you, no matter what, I'm not leaving you and I love you Ethan, alot". I say as I kiss his forehead in assurance.

"I love you too" he says as he hugs me.

He then picks me up in a bridal style.

And then whole night we spend talking to each other and sleeping in each other arms.

****

I'm making memories of each family member with Mona, that doesn't include spending the day.

I'm making something special.

Like:

Spending day with Marco and Monday.

Girls day out.

Ethan and Mona's kind of fight.

So they're making memories.

I hope you're not disappointed.

Do comment.

Enjoy.

Please share my story, their angel.

Thank you for all the love.

I love you all.

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