I'd gotten released from the hospital wing later that day, just before lunch.

The marauders had been released earlier than me, straight after being treated by Madam Pomfrey, so I didn't get to spend any more time with them.

They were either roaming through the castle or catching up on some lost sleep.

It frustrated me a little bit that they were Gryffindors and I was a Ravenclaw, because I could never spend time with Sirius and Remus, or even James and Peter, inside of our common rooms, which made meeting each other much more complicated.

At lunch, I found out that my Ravenclaw friends had already finished their homework yesterday, when I was being treated.

So that left me alone with three essays and one practical assignment.

Being alone had the advantage of being able to choose where I wanted to be, though.

Since it was a nice spring day; sunny but not too hot, I brought my stuff outside and sat down under a huge tree, with a view over the black lake sparkling in the distance.

I really wasn't too fond of doing homework right now, but I had to do them some time, right?

So I started the Potions essay for Professor Slughorn.

I had been busy for quite a while, yet I had only finished two essays (I had often caught myself just staring at the lake, oops).

Only a Transfiguration exercise and an essay for Astronomy were left. I was currently doing the latter when someone sat down next to me.

Startled, I looked to my left, where Sirius was making himself comfortable.

"You're such a nerd."

At his sight, the butterflies in my stomach went wild, like they always did. I'd been crushing on him for almost a month now, I realised.

That was longer that I'd thought it would be, and that worried me a little. When would those feelings finally disappear?

But still, I was super happy to see him sitting next to me, though I had to play it cool.

I raised an eyebrow. "I'm just living up to the expectations of being a Ravenclaw. Or maybe not, because I've fallen behind. Nevermind. How did you find me?"

Sirius smiled secretively and held up his left hand, in which he held a blank piece of parchment.

I felt oddly great for knowing what he meant. "Aah, okay."

And I felt amazing, knowing that Sirius had actually searched for me. They were the smallest gestures that made me know he cared, and those gestures meant more than anything to me.

The warm feeling intensified.

So much for my crush disappearing.

"What are you doing?" Sirius asked, skooting closer.

I could feel my heart pounding, and I had difficulties breathing.

He was sitting so close to me that our shoulders were occasionally touching, and somehow that was too much for my brain to handle. Stupid, useless thing.

Sirius looked down on my empty parchment, and the star chart next to it. "Astronomy?"

I forced myself to snap out of it and stopped staring at his side profile. I blinked. "Ehrm, yeah. I saved the worst for last."

Sirius' head snapped towards me, and no word on earth could describe the shocked and disbelieving expression on his face. "The worst?!"

His reaction unsettled me, so I blushed even more. "Yeah," I mumbled quietly. "I suck at Astronomy; it's my worst subject."

Sirius didn't reply for a while, he just kept staring at me with this indescribable expression.

"Wooow," he finally said. "I can't imagine you being bad at something so easy and amazing!"

"I take it you're good at Astronomy?"

"The best! I love it!" He smiled brightly, the shock almost completely gone. It had to be, when he was already being able to compliment himself again.

"I can teach you, if you want?"

I laughed. "Oh, don't even try, I'm a lost case. All of these stars look the same to me! And, in my eyes, all of them can look like every constellation, if you just know which stars to connect!"

Sirius patted my head. "Spoken like a true novice. I'll change that."

"Eerm, how? I'm terrible!"

Sirius shook his head, smiling slightly. Then he nudged my elbow. "That's so typical for you; you're underestimating yourself. You can't be that bad if you've managed to take it as a NEWT class."

I was about to reply when Sirius continued, gasping in mock shock, a hand on his chest. "Oh, don't tell me you've only gotten an 'Exceeds Expectations'!"

"Ha ha, very funy," I said sarcastically, but couldn't suppress my grin. "I had an 'Acceptable'."

"What a scandal," Sirius grinned.

A small giggle escaped me, as much as I tried to suppress it. "Oh, shut up."

"Okay," Sirius said and wrapped an arm around me, pulling me a little closer to him.

Cue me almost hyperventilating or going into cardiac arrest.

"After I've made you an expert in Astronomy," he continued, and I sighed in defeat, trying to hide my inner turmoil because of our current position. I was really tempted to just lean my head on his shoulder, but I thankfully managed to control myself.

"Okay, let's get even less sleep," I rolled my eyes, but Sirius' grin didn't disappear. That's when I realised that I'd been staring at him, so I quickly looked away.

"You'll thank me soon enough."

"We'll see about that." I still had my doubts. Although I knew that Sirius was an amazing teacher, Astronomy just wasn't in my blood.

"Are you challenging me?" Sirius turned to face me, a smirk on his lips

I looked at him, too.

We were sitting so close to one another, only two fingers would've fitted between our noses.

"I don't know, am I?" I replied, before I forgot what talking was.

My eyes flickered from his eyes to his lips.

'Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it, don't do it, DON'T DO IT,' my head kept on screaming, but my pounding heart was really telling me otherwise.

It wanted nothing more than me or Sirius to lean forward and kiss.

'Don't do it!', My head kept repeating, but I found myself leaning forward a tiny (almost unnoticeable) bit anyways.

Was it really a good idea to hide my feelings, hoping that they would disappear? They were getting harder to fight, the more time passed. I didn't know if I could resist much longer.

I really wanted to kiss Sirius and be with him. I was so tempted to do the first move, which really surprised me.

Sirius made me feel comfortable and confident. He managed to bring out a side of me that I didn't know I had.

It was as if he'd found yet another secret passageway, this one leading to my head and heart.

I had befriended him only three months ago, and still it felt as if I had been close with him for much longer.

He just made me feel happy and alive.

'But what if he doesn't feel the same!? You'll ruin everything, DON'T DO IT,' my inner voice screamed again.

I turned my face away and looked at the sun slowly setting over the black lake.

I didn't even want to know whether the sky or my cheeks were redder. I tried to calm my heart rate, but Sirius didn't turn away and replied completely relaxed. "Whether you were or weren't challenging me, I'll accept. You'll be a solid 'E' student in no time."

Since I still was at a loss for words and breathless because I had forgotten to breathe earlier, I didn't dare to speak.

I nodded, a little distracted.

Why had my body done that without my brain's permission?! I was supposed to be the boss!

Why had I done that, and why had it been so close!? I could've ruined everything!

I was terrified. Of my feelings, my desires, my actions and their possible outcomes. Why did everything have to be so complicated!?

But I knew that I would continue to keep quiet.

I couldn't risk it. Our friendship meant everything to me.

Sirius didn't seem to have noticed anything. He eyed the star chart. "Great. Then let's meet at the bottom of the Astronomy tower, next Saturday, at midnight. There are good constellations, and we know that Professor Sinistra doesn't have a class, then, okay?"

I shrugged, finally trusting my voice again. "You're the expert. Okay."

Since I thought that I'd sounded a little hoarse, I cleared my throat.

As I was trying to look anywhere but Sirius' eyes or lips, I eyed the parchment on my lap.

Merlin, I'd completely forgotten about that.

I really didn't want to write that essay.

But hey, apparently I had a genius sitting next to me.

My awkwardness forgotten, I grinned. "But please, you can help me with that god-forsaken essay first."