《Strings》Chapter 16
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Time indifferently continues to march on, uncaring of the pain and heartbreak of a single little girl. The crowd acts much the same, going about their day without even glancing at the collapsed young woman, who wails in hysteria. Seeing such a scene, Eli can only feel numb. This indifference from those around him, while not commonly seen in his daily life, is to be expected. After all, he looks at the crowd in much the same way, seeing them simply as walking masses of history. With tired eyes, he shifts his gaze down to Audrey, confusion gradually welling up within his gaze. Didn’t she give up too easily? Yes, she was pushed, and yes, the person disappeared rather quickly, but as someone accustomed to living on the streets, I would have expected her to at least chase after them. Could it be that she’s not as tough as she makes herself out to be? Or could it be that her return to her childhood home has softened her up, making her spirit more easily broken? Eli is consumed by a deep sense of bitterness, leaving him as an emotionless husk only capable of judging and analyzing his friend.
He moves closer to his weeping companion, and silently crouches down next to her. He speaks softly.
“Audrey, that’s enough. There’s no need to get so worked up.”
Though his tone is gentle and warm, his words are ruthlessly cold. His eyes refuse to flicker with life as they stare down, grey slabs that are numb to the world around them. His face is rigid, and his mouth moves unnaturally, as if he's having difficulty properly expressing himself. It's an expression that hasn't been seen in a surprisingly long time, to the point that it now feels uncomfortable. Such an indifferent tone makes its way into Audrey's ears. And suddenly, her fears and worries have a place to be directed towards, rather than simply thrashing about uncontrollably. She looks at him, mania and fear and grief rushing through her body like the blood in her veins. At first she gives him an uncomprehending look, clearly not understanding his words, then, as their meaning gradually settles in, her face begins to fall, a look of betrayal contorting her expression.
“You… Y-You don’t care?! What do you mean there’s ‘no need to get worked up?!’ I, my, everything is gone…!”
Anger.
“M-My dad! That’s the last thing he left me! Without it, h-he’s gone… There’ll be nothing left… Soon, everyone will forget about him, they’ll let him rot in that place and never see the outside world ever again…”
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Regret.
“... I had a chance… I had a chance to change things, and yet… And yet, I got impatient… I got greedy… I-I should have gone home, should have taken a break… This is my fault… There was no reason to stay out longer than I needed to…”
And finally, emptiness.
Blank eyes without life or light stare at Eli as reality begins to set in. The realization that in so short a time, in a single instant where she wasn’t 100% vigilant, she lost everything. She lost the most important thing to her -- the past.
“...”
Eli looks into her eyes, the swirling pits of despair and madness, and smiles. It’s a familiar smile, a look filled with pain and longing, loss and shame. The expression is withdrawn, the small curling of the lips, barely even considered an expression, and yet, when Audrey looks at such a face, such a twisted smile, she feels her heart squeeze and thump, threatening to burst from her chest. Suddenly, like a spring breeze or a dandelion’s kiss, his voice, gentle and calm, caresses her ears.
“It’s fine. It’s gonna be alright. This isn’t the end. There’s always gonna be tomorrow, there’s always gonna be something to look forward to. This isn’t the end... Your guitar isn’t gone forever, it can still be found. There’s no reason to tire yourself out like this… Come on, get up. We still have everything we need. Let’s go home to recover, we can think of a plan then.”
She stares dumbfounded at Eli’s mirthless smile, faintly feeling as if those rapid-fire words were more directed towards himself, as if he, in the past, wished someone to give him such hope. Coming to that realization, she feels herself relax, letting out a heavy sigh filled with all of her pain and fear. Subconsciously her mouth twists, forming an expression similar to Eli’s. The two sit in silence, blankly smiling at each other in the middle of the increasingly busy sidewalk. This silence continues until, eventually, Eli breathes out a sigh of relief, sure that Audrey’s calmed down to a reasonable level and shows no sign of losing her mind. He stands, his expression light, if a bit whimsical. Ultimately, the act of comforting someone is completely foreign to him, with his only experience being the occasional moments where his mother had a mental breakdown and he needed to stop her from hurting herself. Looking down, he offers his hand, his eyes soft and understanding.
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‘C’mon, there’s more important things to do than sit here panicking. The sooner we get back the sooner we can think of a plan.”
Audrey, though reluctant to go back, wanting instead to look for any traces of her attacker, chooses to trust her friend. With a sigh, she reaches out and clasps Eli’s hand, feeling his grip tighten as he drags her to her feet. Then with her hand still firmly in his grasp, he leads her down the street, the outside world eventually fading away until it’s just the two of them walking in complete silence.
Walking about a half step behind Eli, Audrey shifts her line of sight, looking at his side profile with a blank expression. She’s not sure what to think. The thoughts in her head are a blur, an incomprehensible mess of scrambled rambling. There’s one thing she understands however, something that she deeply comprehends. There’s no bells. It’s silent... There’s still hope… She closes her eyes, because of him. It’s an intimate understanding she has with this world. Wherever there is danger, where there's a road that leads to her downfall or a mistake that can end it all, the maddened ringing will return, forcing her onto the correct pathway, a harsh reminder to not stray from the proper path. Its appearance is mostly random, often appearing moments before a detrimental choice is about to be made. There’s a lot she doesn't understand about the power, the curse, but what she does know allows her to conclude that the power is truly there for her well being. If it’s silent, then there’s still a future. I can still move forward… but, does that future include my dad?
After some time two manage to reach the house. The gate the police have erected has been left unlocked by the pair of irresponsible children, a sign of their lack of foresight but also a lucky break in hindsight, as they now won’t need to climb across the barbed wire. Pushing open the gate, Eli leads Audrey up to the house, internally worrying that the door will be locked and that they would have lost the key with the guitar. He reaches out. The door handle jiggles. A loud clanging rings out. Just as his expression starts to sink, the door unjams and swings open. The interior of the building welcomes the two of them with open arms. Seeing as they’ve made it home without any further incident, Eli breathes out a sigh of relief, the pent up worry he’s had building up within him finally bursting out into a single, drawn out breath.
Looking at her stressed out friend, Audrey anxiously calls out, only to be immediately interrupted by a voice both gentle and firm.
“Audrey, you should go back to your room. Take a nap. We can talk when you wake up.”
Despite his words being rather controlling, she can’t turn her back on his concern. It’s also obvious to the both of them that she’s beyond tired. Her steps are heavy and her body has been swaying side to side ever since they’ve stopped walking. Her eyelids have been constantly drooping, blurring the world with every blink. Letting the exhaustion settle in, she slowly nods her head, taking a step to get to her room. Suddenly, she feels her hand get squeezed, causing her to look down. There she sees that she's still tightly grasping Eli’s hand, their fingers are still interlocked. She blushes and begins to separate herself from the man. Just then, she hears him speak, a smile on his lips, the firm resolve obvious in his voice.
“Really, Audrey, there’s no need to worry. We’ll get you your guitar back. Just get some rest, this has been a long day.”
As her heart fills with a firm sense of trust, she nods her head. As soon as she does, Eli lets her hand go, separating himself from her. He watches as she goes upstairs, her footsteps heavy on the floorboards, having forgotten to take off her shoes in her tiredness. As he stares at her disappearing back, the soft smile on his face gradually fades away, leaving an expression absent of any and all emotion. A hollow husk of a human. A being of absolute calmness.
Without any further thought or an ounce of hesitation, Eli turns around, softly closing the door behind him. In that state of absolute calculation, the world slowly begins to unravel itself before him, the strings swirling into a writhing storm of chaos.
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