Welcome to the system, Ted Jones! Good luck, and try not to die.

Ted stared. Above his head was a floating red box, obstructing his view. He had just woken up to the blaring of his alarm, and the first thing that greeted him was a floating box. Wonderful, I come down with a hallucination on my day off. He briefly wondered if he had finally cracked, if officework had finally caused the last shreds of his sanity to snap. He then discarded the idea. First, if he had gone insane, he probably wouldn't know he had gone insane. Second, he felt no urge to burn his workplace into the ground, exorcising it from the earth like the vile tumor on society it was.

...Well, no more an urge than normal. Rising up, Ted slammed the snooze button on his alarm clock, and took in his room. Everything was neat and tidy. He had a dresser in one corner, one of the cheap plastic ones with see-through shelves. Atop it was a cage containing his pet bunny, Tortoise, who stared at Ted with insistent eyes.

"I'll feed you in a moment," Ted said, rising from his bed and slipping on a pair of house shoes, cracking his neck. Right, if he hadn't snapped, that meant he was hallucinating the red box due to having been exposed to something, probably. And my healthcare is unlikely to cover it, considering it barely covers anything at all.

Right. He had neither the time nor the coverage to be dealing with visual hallucinations, and he lacked the medication required to get rid of it, so he'd try dealing with it the same way most poor americans dealt with illness:

By willing it away and hoping ignoring it didn't come to bite one in the ass.

To Teds luck, it seemed to work, this once, as the red box dissappeared without another word. Right, woo, don't have to go to the hospital!

...Probably. He WAS mildly wrong that they got his last name wrong, however. It was actually Ted J-

Ted was, at that moment, interrupted by a loud banging on his bedroom door, which caused the poor officeworker to nearly jump out of his skin. Holy YHVH, I'm getting robbed!

His mind raced as he looked around the room for something, anything to defend himself, and to his despair, saw nothing except MAYBE his bedside lamp. He snatched it up before realizing to his despair that whoever was breaking in PROBABLY had a gun. Right. Better to hide.

The banging continued, to the point the door began to crack, and Ted briefly wondered WHY they were banging on the door what with it not having a lock. However, he immediately discarded that thought, and focused on hiding, quickly deciding his closet was the best option. Diving into the filthy clothes strewn chasm, he buried himself under the mountain of apparel as fast as he could, at the same time ensuring he'd have a small opening in the pile with which to see.

After a moment, his door finally gave in, and in stumbled in something that stopped Teds breath.

It was in the rough shape of a human, even wearing a suit. If Ted didn't see its face, he might have thought it just another person. However, when one gazed at its face...

Half of it was missing, as if ripped off, exposing bloody skull and raw flesh. The remaining skin was grey, too grey, its eyes white and cloudy, with the things mouth drawn back into a joyless, hungry looking grin, its gums black with some sort of tar substance dribbling down from it. Worse was the rank smell of decay that came from the thing, so powerful that Ted could smell it from the closet.

Shambler

Lv 1 Undead

Information Locked.

Well. Thats something I definitely don't want to tangle with. I'll just. I'll just keep hiding and hope the horrible ghoul creature goes away. Ted dismissed the red box and prepared to wait.

You've gained the skill Hiding!

Hiding (Ubiquitous) Rank 1- The skill concerning the ability to go unnoticed while staying still. At this rank, you're marginally better at going unnoticed!

Confound these annoying red boxes! They'd drive Ted to drink! He quickly willed it away and waited for the zombie to leave. The moments passed, and the creature began stumbling forward, and to Teds dismay, he realized the creature wasn't going to leave just yet. It might not have noticed Ted, but it did notice the rooms other occupant.

Ted grimaced. It was going after Tortoise. He considered leaving the bunny to die, but immediately dismissed the thought. He wasn't the type of heartless bastard to leave a beloved companion to get brutally murdered just to save his own skin. Right. He had to wait for the right moment, however.

The ghoul approached the cage and began trying to pry it open, Tortoise cowering in the corner like the adorable puff ball he was. Ted crept forward. He had to do this JUST right. After a moment, he was within striking range. He raised his lamp, and brought the wooden base down on the zombies head.

The creature stumbled, only for Ted to again strike it, and continue striking it, until the creature had fallen prone. Ted, with all the adrenaline a crazed officeworker suffering from hallucinations would have, then brought his foot down on the shamblers head, stomping it repeatedly until the thing merely twitched. He paused a moment, sighing, thinking he was done, only for the thing to begin to rise again.

Ted, with resplendant grace and poise, proceeded to kick it in the face.

Ted sat on the bed, and breathed in and out in an almost manual manner. The adrenaline had wore off, and he just realized that he had actually KILLED something. That...that was a sobering thought. Ted wasn't, in his opinion, a violent person, and yet he had just offed another creature. He'd call it a living, breathing creature, but, well. He supposed he probably needed to call the police. Would they arrest him? He hoped not, he could barely survive officework, he doubted he'd survive prison. Maybe he should hide the body, maybe that would be the prudent action. He'd probably have to buy a lot of bleach and limestone, but-

Congratulations! For slaying a zombie, you've gained 10 XP! For your actions during your fight, you've gained the skills Stealth, Sneak Attack, and Improvised Weaponry! For defending a beloved pet, you've gained the skill Animal Empathy and the perk Wyld!

Stealth (Uncommon) Rank 1- The ability to move around unnoticed. At this rank, you are minimally harder to notice!

Sneak Attack (Uncommon) Rank 1- The ability to strike enemies unaware. At this rank, sneak attacks do slightly more damage!

Improvised Weaponry (Rare) Rank 1- The ability to utilize as weapons things that aren't intended to be weapons. At this rank you do moderately more damage with improvised weapons and they're moderately more durable.

Animal Empathy (Rare) Rank 1- The ability to communicate with animals and be understood by them. At this rank, animals are marginally more likely to understand you and moderately more friendly.

Wyld Level 1: Increased Green Mana affinity, ???, ???, ???.

What the funky fresh fu-

END CHAPTER 1.1