Chapter 30

Phee Phi Pho Phum

(that time I stood under a monster-three way…)

“Run!” I shouted. Stealth was out the window. The cyclops was at least twenty feet tall and might have had one eye but because of its large size it had better vision than both of us put together. In fact, looking at the beast I was sure that its eye was the size of a full grown man standing on their tip toes. We had definitely taken a wrong turn somewhere getting to the dock and wandered into the Cyclop’s territory. It was no wonder no one ever went this far outside Haven.

The giant cyclops spotted us and groaned. I think it was more upset that its cockatoos had broken loose from their coop, that and the giant crocodile had eaten one for lunch. We were easy prey, just big enough to squish with a thump it could take out some of its aggression.

We sprinted across the swamp. We didn’t care about the mud or water anymore. Running through the marsh and dodging poisonous snakes we dashed fast as our legs could carry us. Jumping over fallen trees we were just out of the cyclops line of sight. I grabbed Ajax by the collar and pulled him into the husk of a fallen tree that was rotting on the ground in front of us. He smacked his head against the back of the wooden carcuss. The inside was filled with orange sap, spider webs, and of course a small nest of snake eggs. Luckily their mother wasn’t in sight.

The cyclops groaned and stomped the ground. We could feel the tree trunk shake as it did, forcing us to roll several feet through the swamp. Water poured in from one side but not enough to get us wet. Not that it would have mattered, our clothes were already soaked with swamp water and mud. If the cyclops nose worked as well as its one eye it would have picked us out of the forest floor in a heartbeat but luckily evolution had only played favorite when it came to strength, size, and the one giant eye.

“Can we fight it?” Ajax asked.

I wasn’t sure. I hadn’t used my insight skill to measure its health. Given its size though my instincts told me there was no way. We’d be crushed, ground, and turned into putty. The cyclops would drink our blood as a cool summer drink and ground up our bones into salt. The rest of us would be fed to the cockatoos. I could just imagine the Cyclops spreading out our insides across the ground now, bits and pieces tossed along the chicken coop floor like seed. Best we could hope for is it splinters our bones and chokes.

“No,” I answered, “no way. We need toe stay as quiet as possible.”

Ajax nodded.

The cyclops wasn’t giving up through. I could feel it drop to its knees. It was picking up rocks and trees, looking underneath them.

We were unable to hide our footprints and when the Cyclops found them I heard it gasp. It was coming for us.

I readied my sword Samosek, tightening my grip around it with both hands as I prepared for the worst. I could even feel Gob shivering in my pocket, curled up, hiding. We were chow. Twice now I was going to die in the belly of a monster. At least getting killed by a dragon had been an awesome feat, one large enough to leave a mark on the history of this world. This, no one would remember this.

The cyclops let out a loud painful cry. The back of its leg turned and slammed into the dead tree trunk and we rolled further into the swamp. This time the water came up to our ankles and we began to sink.

The back end of the tree trunk broke and we saw the face of the crocodile back for desert. It crunched its jaws around the snake nest and crunched. The egg shells were hard as rocks but the croc didn’t care. They still cracked between its teeth, exploding. Red and yellow ‘yoke’ drifted over the top of the water as the croc opened its jaw again sucking in the rest.

“Out now,” I yelled. Ajax and I both ran out of the tree trunk through the same hole we came in at. The croc had its fill and didn’t pursue us. That or maybe it was smart enough to know we were already taken by the cyclops. I wasn’t sure which one was higher on the food chain. Both were powerful creatures, one an apex land predator and another an apex water predator. Then us, stuck in the middle.

Turning we saw why the Cyclops had screamed. A giant snake was wrapped around its arm, its fangs dug into its wrist. He was slamming it on the ground, its body flattening as its bones and scales tore away. We might have gone unnoticed when we disturbed the snake’s nest but not the cyclops. The croc was really having a lucky day. So lucky, it decided to take a bite out of the Cyclop’s leg. Moving quickly through the mud and water it launched itself outward at the cyclops and grabbed a chunk of meat from its leg. The Cyclops slammed the snake’s head down against it. It was hard enough to crack the snake’s neck. If it hadn’t wrapped itself around the giant’s arm I was sure it would have let go immediately but the two had become one. The only way the snake was letting go was when the Cyclop’s scrapped it off on the side of a tree.

The croc drew back. Its jaws opened and it went for the Cyclops again. I guess it knew if it won it would get all the cockatoo it could eat. The Cyclops pushed its arm with the snake still wrapped around it inside the giant crocodile’s throat. The croc’s jaws closed. The Cyclops screamed and pummeled the crocodile in the eye. When it wouldn’t open and began to roll the Cyclops grabbed hold of it, buried its finger into the croc’s eye and pushed hard as it could. Blood gushed as Ajax and I began running away from the battle. The Cyclops lifted the Croc and pulled. Something inside the croc tears away and it stops moving. The giant uses the croc’s razor sharp teeth to tear apart the snake’s body like a cheese shedder.

It wasn’t over. Three more cockatoo were in our area and they had caught sight of us. Forget ground us up, we must have looked delicious as we were. Little bone treats. They gave chase and I cut one down with my sword. Another Ajax nailed in the beak, cracking it. It turned tail and ran. The third was nearly over the top of us. It slammed its beak down against the ground, getting it caught in the mud. Before it could pull its neck back up I leapt through the air and swiped Samosek down across its neck slitting it open from end to end. The head of the giant chicken fell and I earned a new title as a notification appeared.

‘Big Bird Butcher.’

I smirked. Only for a moment though as I turned and saw the giant standing over us. Its eye was bloodshot. Blood poured down across its hairy body from its right arm. The snake’s head was still stuck in its wrist but the rest of the snake was gone. It looked even angrier now that we had given it actual reason to hate us. It opened its mouth and roared, the smell of its breath was nearly enough to knock us unconscious. It tore the snake head out of its arm and threw it in our direction. I felt like someone had shrunken us down into tiny miniatures. The monsters, the forest, the entire world outside Haven felt so big.

The Cyclops started its march. With nowhere to run I lifted my sword and Ajax loaded his slingshot. It was time for the ‘Dragon Piercer’ to earn his mantle.