a Joyride to home

I was in my brand-new primitive car trying to get out of a death trap, I still cannot believe I haven't shit myself from a panic attack, as I pushed mana from my hands to the wagon wheel it moved.

And I felt the mana as an extension of me from the driving wheel to the wagon wheels, and I willed it to spin, and it moved.

I didn't have the time to enjoy the moment because when the wheels started spinning they made a sound like a servo motors, I froze as I did I lost focus and the mana stopped moving.

Nothing attacked me, which was good I listened and looked around, it was still silent like a grave, that was making me more nervous the blood covering the village wasn't helping, and I started the wagon again.

Guiding the wagon out of the gate and towards the river was a slow process, the only way to control speed or stop was mana, and for choosing a direction it was just the wheel like any normal car except you need to speed up and slow with your mind.

I concentrated on my mana flow and guided the wagon, if you're wondering how it feels, all I can say is it's like walking home to take shit, and as you walk the walk you hold it in and play it cool, so that people won't notice you.

That’s mana control, it’s a fight for dominance, any mistake and I will lose control.

As I traveled I made sure to not leave any tracks behind me, using the river's rocky side I tried doing my best to follow the river back home, the rocks made the trip Bumpy and my low mana and shitty control was helping the rocks slow me down.

I stopped for a bit feeling exhausted from the emotional stress and mana control, if am not mistaken the cores that are connected to the wagon are helping me power the wagon like batteries.

As I was taking my break, I took my shoes off, they got wet yesterday and today on the way to the village and my feet are blistering, thanks to the wagon I don't need to walk home on these sores and blisters.

Still, I can't keep these shoes, I walked to the back of the wagon and found good boots.

I dried my feet and put on the boots,

'Note to self, stay dry and don't fuck with boots, lesson learned'.

Finally, after calming down I was feeling hungry, I can't stop to make dinner and eat on the road it's risky, so I searched my supplies and took out brad and chess along with a small jar with a note that claims it is full of dried deer meat and went back to the front, and started eating and driving.

The food tasted amazing, maybe because I earned it.

Feeling good after eating a good meal for the first time since I have woken up in this world, I realized am actually risking my life for food that is not a good experience even if it makes the food taste better.

As I was driving, I noticed a terrain I recognized,

'This is the place I was attacked'.

I turned the wagon to the right, entering the forest, and traveled in a path that should lead me to the cave.

'Yes, that's home'.

I can believe I did it I actually made it back, the trip back was a test of self-control, holding the fear back was not easy the forest was way too quiet I didn't notice it at first, now that I did, I cannot ignore it, it was creepy quiet.

I parked MY wagon on the cave entrances and started moving, as well as organizing my supplies.

It will take me time to make a plan on how to organize everything into the cave.

In the village I just took everything that looked good and wasn't nailed down, and I did that without any order or categorizing, I was too busy looking around for danger and fearing for my life, now that I am relatively safe I needed order in my life.

Before I moved my supplies into the cave, I needed to secure the path to my home,

First I walked back to the river and covered up any tracks that may lead to my home.

After I made sure there were no obvious tracks to the cave, I walked back to see the wagon looking like the start of a gypsy caravan, it was parked near the cave exposing it.

It was a big giveaway too my location, I walked closer looked at my wagon and started to think on how to get rid of it.

"I need to hide you gypsy, any ideas" I told the wagon as if a magical wagon named gypsy could talk.

There are multiple options, I can try to disassemble it or should I abandon it deep in the forest, no too dangerous, and I may need it in the future.

Disassembly is a not possible, the problem was in the wagon's base, it’s made from wood and an iron frame, my home was just 4 by 6 meters and 2 meters high, I can't have it in the cave or even get it in through the door and that was the deciding factor for me.

"You could be camouflaged." still no reply from the wagon.

I made my choice, camouflage it is as well as hoping for the best.

First the top, it was just a white cloth canvass top, it was supported by a frame of bowed wood, the ends could be closed with a drawstring in bad weather.

Cutting the top should make it smaller and easier to hid with large branches, and removing it won't be a problem, I started with removing and folding the cloth after that I cut the wagon bow.

I collected branches in a large pile near the wagon so that I could camouflage it after unloading my supplies, it will be dark soon, and I didn't want to waste the sunlight.

I took an oil lamp from the wagon, I will use it to see in the cave and make my movement easy in its light.

Furthermore, I picked up the cloth and opened the door to my home placing it inside and put the lamp in the middle of the cave, and went back to the wagon and moved everything in, I will organize everything later in the night.

As soon as I was done unloading, I camouflaged the gypsy and went into the safety of my home, living the darkening sky behind me.

Time to sift through my supplies.

I tried to arrange my supplies as I unloaded them from the wagon, placing the eatables on the right side of the cave and non-eatables on the left, all lined up against the cave wall.

On the right.

The food was in wooden boxes; I counted 46 jars made of clay with no handles, full of dried meat, 13 full of mixed dried fruits, 17 full white pea beans, 2 and a half cheese wheels, and a small bag full of a mixture of seeds, yet I am not a farmer, so I ignored it.

With this food and if I can hunt more I should be okay for a month I just need to work on my hunting skills and get me some fish, maybe I can push it up to two months.

On my left.

Five swords, 2 Kukri blades and a knife, 4 wooden boxes tagged crafting supplies, a big box full of books, and a big pile of clean clothes.

All in total.

[Food, 5 swords, 3 knives, 4 wooden boxes tagged crafting, a wooden box full of books, clothes for man and women,]

The only concern I have here and now is safety am not sure why the forest is so quiet, and I don't want to know the hard way, that's why I need to see if my supplies can offer me an advantage.

The boxes with crafting tag got my attention, the crafting tools looked strange, and I started exploring.

What looked like aluminum foil I think it’s aluminum, but the color is not right, and some more crystals and very small coins of different materials in the same small box that has strange looking pen like fountain pen.

And lenses some looked like the ones used by a watchmaker, strange looking diagrams like circuitry it looked familiar and unusual.

Next was the crystals with the tag memory cores, and the 23 books, yes 23 mixes of books.

I probably left more in the village as I was moving fast, I was in an excellent mode now, and I actually have a real collection of magic and crafting books about wards and symbols of power.

So I have the food that's on less thing to worry about, as for safety learning how to use my MANA is a priority, and the books will be a good start.

I settled myself near the fire and started making my next meal, the light from the lamp made the cave more alive, I could see its history in its cracks.

'This cave needs to be worked on to be a better refuge for me'

I made my meal that was dried meat and mixed pile of dried fruits.

[Fig, raspberry, walnuts, raisins, apple, pineapple]

And cut more Cheese.

As I was eating, I looked at the book pile and wondered what mysteries they holed.

Finally, I was well-fed and full, and I liked this felling, my eyes shifted to the books.

After reading all the titles, I decided it's better if I started on.

** The MANA control principles for the young soul **

I took the book and lamp and moved back close to the fireplace and started to read.

'''to be a mana cultivator is to be a rebel, this is an uprising against the world, and that rebellion manifests itself as a healthy core that functions as your link to your revolt, your core is your anchor to power, keep it clean and cleansed for a pure core is the only path forward.'''

I see it’s all about controlling your MANA and visualizing it move in you and out of you, the people off this world had a deep biological link to MANA, all life seems to have adapted to it, like the electric eel using electricity.

There is an instinctive element to it and MANA seems to react well to the mind that is aware of it, making it interact with the self-aware mind directly and indirectly with lesser minds or should I say less controlled.

In theory human consciousness is quantum in its nature generated from magnetic fields and function of the brain, in other words we are the universe observing its self, and somehow I am in this one fully self-aware yet a bit confused and missing some memories, I can feel it.

The gaps in my mind, it makes me feel violated and the new memories just make it worse, what is true and what is not.

The haziness in amarys's memories helps me feel what is me and what is not, like a map in a dim light, unclear but still helpful.

I know this is not my world and I lack something to be fully integrated in this one the people around me can control MANA better than me, and do things with it, yet I can't fully do it, I am magically crippled in a land where weakness means death if lucky, so that's problematic, and I need to fix this to survive, how?.

When it was midnight, I was too tired and very bored, I stopped reading and thinking and did my best to just ignore that sex magic book I found in the book pile.

I looked at my bed with all its wetness and a disgusting reminder of what could happen, and I decided to sleep like a human being.

I removed it all out of the cave and remade the bed with clean cloth used some new clothes as pajama and extinguish the fire as well as the lamp and went to sleep in a dry bed.

Need time

I woke to the sun rays in my eyes, leaking from the holes in the cave door, 'it's the start of a new day, a busy day'.

It was a long day I only stopped to eat and drink as well as resting after digging a hole outside the cave for bathroom time, and braking my promise to only shit in the river, the same river that was flowing away from the dead village, making my petty revenge all the more pointless and unfeasible.

And in the night I started to read the books.

Day 8.

The days went by, it took me 4 days of reading and thinking and testing my MANA while looking at the crafting tools together with notes and books to come up with a stupid idea.

I was sitting in front of the cave entrance looking at the night sky, considering my idea of a Brain implant.

My old brain implant was called a quantum link, it was just organic tissue with Nano-elements that allowed it to connect to digital systems, that link is still active my memories are a prof of it still being active, yet the link is not the same it's limited in its functionality.

Something happened it's not working as it should, what ever happened to it must have effected its functionality I can feel the difference of the absence of an interface, and why is it functioning as if it was just a normal memory as if its higher functions are disabled.

My problem is, control so why not have a tool that can help me do it, I still have all my uploaded knowledge in my mind all the skills of 60 years of programming studying circuitry and programming AIs.

If I can fix it, I can use it as my missing something to full control my MANA.

In theory, this magic spell MANA stuff it can all be programmed it's just a matter of power flow and control so why not add automation to it, my link was used to help regulate my old hart and all the cybernetics in my old body, so why not MANA.

The binary math of computation won't change, it's just input output, just the tools and method will change.

I won't be inventing anything new, just copying from memory and slightly changing some parts and using new things like MANA.

In its core it is all the same principle of data flow and balancing of input output with binary math as it's foundation to control the flow.

I need to fix it, I need the tools, and I need to cultivate and live longer and rebuild what is needed.

Feeling exhausted, I stood and walked back in, closing the door behind me, and continued my train of thought.

I just need to embrace the madness of MANA read more book learn crafting, maybe after I control my MANA I can get a crafting job to have good income in the safety of walled city.

I almost smiled as I settled myself into bed and closed my eyes.

Through the terror, through the horror, I will survive this.