Alice

"I spoke to Henry about that shit he pulled last night." I say suddenly as we bask in the sun at the balcony.

Michael sitting inclined on a deck chair with shaded glasses on as he listens to the sounds of the city while overlooking Central Park.

"What 'shit' are you referring to dear?" He asks casually, grabbing the glass of ice tea I just put at his side without turning to look.

I watch him drink half of it and place it back on the deck besides himself expertly, not once turning his head.

"That possessive shit he pulled during sex." I was angry at that, and a little scared for him. Even in a wheel chair Michael can be a very dangerous person, something Henry seems to have forgotten.

"You noticed that did you?" He says turning to loom at me lifting his shades before going back to watching the view or whatever he was doing.

"I noticed a lot of things last night and I made sure he understands that I'm yours, your my husband, me and him are just very good friends." I say, already getting frustrated with how calmly he's taking this. Maybe I'm also a bit scared on Henry's behalf, what if Michael is angry about that and does something to Henry or gets some of his friend's to do something?

"Sometimes I think Henry is who you were meant to be with, that if we hadn't met you two would have made the perfect couple." He says then shrugs, ''but then you mist see something in me to be so devoted to me.''

He faces me again and takes of the glasses, "I wonder what it might be sometimes."

I keep silent at that, I don't like his philosophical moods sometimes, especially when we are both sober.

The worst part is that I know he means what he says, even if he means it today but won't mean it tomorrow. At this very moment he believes what he says without a shred of doubt and he has reasons for thinking this way, shit!

"You're still the coolest guy I've ever met babe. No one has anything on you, you can trust me on that." I say as I usually do when he asks me how 'he' got so lucky.

The man has no scale by which to compare himself and so doesn't see how amazing of a person he is. And I don't just mean his personality, he is just a more complete person than the rest of the world, he always has been. Autonomous, stable, able to happily spend time alone than the rest the rest of us who can be lonely in a crowd of people.

"Sometimes I think I stole you from the world. Just snatched you up for myself, and the accident is in a small part me paying for that audacity."

"Jesus Michael, that's a fucked up thing to say even for you." I say loudly.

I know he meant nothing by it, that he was just having an 'outrospective' conversation. What he sometimes calls it when he's being introspective out loud for someone to respond to his inner thoughts.

"Cooler than the surfer guys we met in L.A just before James was born?" He asks while hiding behind his glasses again and facing the park.

It takes a moment for me to catch up but I do. "You're a different kind of cool, but yea you're definitely cooler."

That's another thing with Michael, a conversation with him never truly ends. He can bring up something you spoke about two days ago in the middle of another conversation and you either have to understand what he's saying or he drops it.

Everything he says is important to me, edifying in some way either by being captivating, funny, witty, corky or just simply profound. Sometimes he says silly things but those are important simply because they come from him. For him to drop most things is a shame, so I learnt to keep up.

He also has an uncanny ability of knowing when I don't want to talk about something. That's a recent development though.

"So why didn't you tell me you could get it up again?" I ask while sipping in my tea.

He simply shrugs, thinking his thoughts. The man is going to drive me to smoke again with how frustrating he is.

We stay quiet a while, I hope last night wasn't too much for him, though some of those acts were a first for me as well. But at least it was with Michael and Henry, with anyone else I think I'd still be scrubbing the grim from my psyche.

"Did you know Alanza is a little in love with you?" He suddenly says casually as though he hasn't just dropped a bomb.

I scowl at him but try to imagine what he saw that made him think that. I saw them talking, the sight of them like that... It upset me a bit. The way she enjoyed my Michael, I was wondering how she tolerates me with Henry but this could explain a few things.

"How sure are you?" I ask just to get an idea of how much he may have seen or heard her say.

"That she's into you 100%, that she's in love with you maybe say 80% sure. I'm surprised you didn't notice, you're usually on top of these things."

"Yea well men make it obvious with their lingering eyes and silly jokes and sweaty palms." I sigh, I've never actually been with a woman one on one before.

Never even kisses a woman before having to share henry, even in this day and age. Even in college it was always boys. Alanza is beautiful though there is no doubt about that.

"What do you recommend?" I finally ask.

"Do you two get along?"

"We get along fine, now that you've mentioned her being into me I think that may be why. I like her as a person, she's smart, assertive without being aggressive or bitchy. I like her voice, very smokey and seductive. I've actually never had a girl come up to me and proposition me before."

"They all probably know they'd get rejected if they know you at all. You're very heterosexual." He says with that cute grin on his face.

"Thanks... I think. So what should I do?"

"Take her out, just the two of you. See if you have any chemistry, you've had a dickless lover before. See how it goes with her."

"Your not dickless Michael, Jesus! Stop being so crushed and self deprecating alright? Not in my presence, not even as a joke."

"Yes dear," he says with a smile.

"How long are you staying?" I ask, the man is a free spirit. He likes having a place to call home, an anchor, a base. But he is never there for very long, he likes exploring, wondering out for a while before coming back home.

"I can leave tomorrow."

"Good, 'cause I took the day off. I want that baby juice in me tonight."

"I'm not sure I can repeat that performance actually. Still have to talk to my doctor about it."

"Yea well I've already booked an appointment to get my IUD out today. I'll have lunch with Alanza after, then I'm all yours." I say with a smile. God I've missed having sex with him.

"I'll see some friends in the city while you're out, but I'll be home before you. So chop chop."

"Yes sir!" I say with a salute heading for the shower. He said 'home'. He called the 'home' again. I grin to myself. It will be a good day.