《Phenomena the Basic Witch and The Mind Safari》Chapter Twenty Four: Finnix Wright Fish Attorney
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For the third time in two years, Mena and her friends entered the court room in the Dream Castle. Mena had come to hate this particular room because whenever it was used, it usually involved her and her friends.
Her stomach gurgled ominously as she walked past the dark pews of the room. The O’Ryan family already sat in the pews, all three of them taking up twice the space of a regular human. Toyah, Ashlan’s mother, looked the most worried and she gave Mena a terrified glance. It seemed Stellaris had already filled her in on Ashlan’s supposed crime. The Tessellation sat behind them, trying to peer over the lion people’s shoulders to no avail. Even the normally proud Laetitia seemed downcast over her falling out with Ashlan. Several witnesses from the play were also there, including Doogey, Billy Bones, and those who were the filler Merlot and Cabernets.
Mena and her friends sat next to Scalia, who was the only one who looked on with confidence. “My father will be arriving shortly," Scalia said, reassuring everyone. “But he’s a bit late.”
“I hope he remembers where the Dream Castle is,” Janus remarked wryly, but Scalia glared at him.
“Forget I said that one,” Janus said, giggling over her insensitive joke.
As they sat down, the loud doors creaked behind them, and Stellaris and Electra marched into the room. Following them, was Ashlan, detained by two Lollypop guards. A pale faced Toyah nearly fainted at the sight of her daughter being magi-cuffed.
“My baby,” the large lioness cried, making Mena feel bad about that.
“Don’t worry,” Scalia said to Toyah from across the pews, my father will see to it that she get’s proper justice.
Ashlan managed a small smile. “Thank you for helping me,” she said to Scalia as she passed by. “I know cat’s like me normally eat fish, but I’ll try to watch my diet.”
“None taken,” Scalia giggled in a bubbly voice.
The two Lollypop guards led her to the stand. Electra stood on the opposing stand, and Stellaris walked to the judge’s seat. She banged the gavel. “Court is now in session. I Stellaris Andromeda, headmaster of Nightdream Academy will be presiding over the case of Sunbeam Academy Boy’s School V. Ashlan O’Ryan.”
As a crackle of electricity sizzled on the tip of Electra's finger, Electra glowered, "And I, Maxine Electra, am the prosecutor...or as they called me in law school, the electrocutor."
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Electra marched to the front of the the pews and announced,
"We are here today because Miss O'Ryan is accused of stabbing Prince Tal of the Shadow nomads. This is a grace and serious matter and we will interview everyone in Dulabetical order."
"Drat rats!" Mena said. "Curse my surname. I hate being at the end of the Dulabet."
"Hullo!" May said, waving her hand in front of Mena. "Did you forget I'm a Cumberson?"
Janus rattled her bones too. "And I'm relatively early on the Dulabet too, being a Harvester."
"Don't worry, m'ladies," said a nerdy voice. They turned around.
It was Billy Bones, tipping his fedora. "I will crusade on behalf of my beloved, bone-worthy Janus Harvester."
He pointed at Janus who immediately shook her head. "I'd rather you make no bones about me. We can handle ourselves nicely. Thank you."
Billy Bones frowned. "Suit yourself!" he said and was immediately called up.
He stomped up to the stand, his bony body jangling like someone ran an xylophone mallet across his ribcage.
"He's rattling mad," May whispered to Janus. "I'm not sure you should have done that."
"Billy Bartholomew Bones," Electra said to him. "You were on stage when the suspect stabbed Prince Tal"--she held up a picture of a skeleton--"Point to where the foul villainess stabbed the victim."
Billy Bones scratched his curved chin before removing his arm and jousting with it. "Right through the collar bone!"
Mena immediately glared at Janus, who covered her face in her hand, realizing her mistake.
"I lay my case to rest," Billy Bones said.
"Thank you," Electra said smugly," You may step down."
As he did, he jeered at Janus. "This is why it helps to have a caring bone in your body."
Janus slumped back as May was called to the forefront.
"Don't worry," May said to Mena and Janus. "I'll produce a better alibi than butthead Bones."
But when, May reached the front of the stage, Electra towered over the already large girl and demanded of her, "What transpired backstage before the suspect and the victim mounted the stage?"
"Umh…" May blubbered "There was an argument between them. Ashlan was very angry."
"Why was the suspect angry?" Electra said, her shadow looming over May.
May looked nervously at Mena and Janus in the audience. Electra stomped in front of May with her finger surging with electricity. May did a double gulp like she swallowed two wizard golf balls. "Ashlan was angry….because Mena took Tal's side in the argument."
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Electra glared at Ashlan. "Is this true…?"
The lioness gave a sad nod.
A large smile curled on Electra's worked-on lips. "A motive," she said. "You may sit back down, Ms. Cumberson."
May looked like a deflated balloon as she sank back to her chair.
Mena frowned, but she knew it wasn't her fault. May didn't want to get the electric chair when she was sitting up there.
A few other witnesses were called up before Electra said, "Janus Harvester," all while beaming proudly.
As Janus stood up, she gave a wistful smile. "I won't fail you, Mena."
Mena thanked her reaper friend, but somehow Electra's confidence was unwavering. Once Janus sat on her pelvis bone, Electra boldly asked her a personal question. "Knowing that you are the daughter of Death, Miss Harvestar, and have certain proclivities to sensing it, did you feel that death was in the air that day…?"
Janus' rouged bones turned ghostly white. "Umm yes…" she squeaked.
"And where did it emanate from?"
"The stage," Janus said and sighed.
Ashlan's mane of lion hair sank when she heard that. Toyah O'Ryan whimpered from the pews. "My baby…"
Janus lost her chipper smile when she returned to her friends. For once, Mena was not thankful that death was one of her best friends.
Next, Doogey was called to the stand. "Describe the argument between the suspect and the victim," Electra inquired of the drama kid.
Mustering his best performance, Doogey didn't disapoint. "It was a crime of passion!"he exclaimed with his hand towards the heavens.
"A love triangle burned bright between a basic witch who can't dance, a haughty lioness and a dark, brooding and handsome boy who makes Spamlet look like Mr. Sunshine.
Everyone sat on the throes of the seat as the foppish boy recounted his tale. "The basic witch defended the brooding boy from the slings and arrows of the outrageous lioness, and that made her jaded. Deep in the recesses of her mind, she plotted away to avenge her fallen pride."
Ashlan glared daggers at Doogey but he continued on his spiel. "When the two mounted the stage, she punctured him and he uttered the phrase, "Alas parting is such sweet sorrow."
There was a loud crash and everyone noticed that Toyah had fainted, crushing both elf sisters beneath her girth.
Electra clasped her hands to her bossom. "Truly a knockout performance Doogey."
The fop bowed and smiled. "And the best part is, I adlibbed it all. This is living proof that even a boy can be a smashing thespian."
Electra continued to call everyone up, ranging from stage hands to extras but none seemed to sway the opinion of the Lollypop jury.
At last, Stellaris called Mena's name, but Electra pleaded with the headmaster. "Your honor. Do we need more witnesses? We're only going to get variations on the same answer: Ashlan O'Ryan is guilty, GUILTY, GUILTY!"
Mena hung her head down. "Miserable magicaps, she is right."
Ashlan looked helplessly at Mena but there was nothing the young witch could do.
All hope seemed to be lost until suddenly, the door swung opens and a tall fishysuaz stood in the doorway. He was bright yellow with several spiky fins making for a pointed head of hair. He sported a blue attorney outfit and he pointed dramatically at Stellaris. "Objection...to everything that's been previously said. And my apologies for being late, the goldfish in me forgot where I was supposed to park."
He flipped his fishy feet across the aisle, showing off a set of brown polished boots.
Scalia immediately stood up with a giddy expression. "Daddy!" she smiled with glee.
"Top o' the fins to you, darling," he said to his daughter.
"Hubba hubba!" Mena said over Scalia's father's handsomeness. "He sure looks young for someone who's a dad!"
"Don't you know," Janus remarked. "Fishysauz live for hundreds of years. They're notorious hard for my father to reap."
Electra's mouth hung open as he offered his fin to her, "Finnix Wright, Fish Attorney."
Electra did not grab his hand but simply mouthed the words from her injected lips.
Finnix Wright put his flippers on his hips. "This case really seems to be in the deep end," he remarked in a theatrical voice. "But that's what a fish lawyer likes best!"
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