《Beyond Chaos - A DiceRPG》191. Reluctance
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Omen: 7, 20
Adam awoke in the morning with something eating at his gut. ‘I don’t want to go.’
‘No, I have to go.’
‘Do I really have to go?’
‘Lucy needs us.’
‘But she’s pretty strong, isn’t she?’
‘That’s besides the point!’
‘Is it?’
‘I promised, didn’t I?’
‘I did, but…’
‘Come on, man.’
Adam forced himself up, staring at the wall ahead of him. He felt the tight grip of Lanarot’s fingers on his finger, and he didn’t dare to look at her for fear of losing his resolve. He brushed the back of Lanarot’s hand with his thumb, causing her to let his finger go.
Adam played with the children in the morning, who fought really hard to win. Adam wondered if he should win, but did he really want to beat them? ‘This might be the last time we see each other… for a while.’ He shook his head, trying to not think about the worst outcome.
Raygak panted as he fell back, staring at the sky. “You will leave today, Adam.”
“Yeah,” Adam replied.
“When you come back, I will win,” Raygak said.
“Yeah,” Adam replied, having accidentally won the games. “When I’m back, I’ll give you your chance at revenge.”
“Will you bring back lots of gifts this time?” Raygak asked.
“Yeah.”
Once he was done playing with the children, he bathed in the river, allowing it to envelope him with it’s chill.
‘I should have gone to the bathhouse.’
He remained in the cold river, allowing his thoughts to enter before quickly being replaced by ‘fuck this is cold,’ until it was the only thing he could think about.
“Adam,” Jurot called for the fifth time.
“Hmm?”
“We should go.” Jurot stared down at the Half Elf, who had been lost in his own world.
“Right.”
Adam dragged himself away, moving as though he was covered in several layers of armour, each of which was not made of the Iyr’s prized puthral.
Eventually Adam returned, and changing into his clothing proper. He wore the attire which Sonarot had brought for him, thick clothing which could be found anywhere, but most importantly was the heavy cloak, white and furry.
“It is important to remain warm during Nightval,” Sonarot said, allowing Adam to change into his clothes properly. “I will not have them say that you two were able to defeat Dragons, but lost against the cold, even if it is a part of nature.”
“I haven’t died to cold yet,” Adam said.
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“But you have died,” Sonarot replied.
Adam nodded his head. “Well, that is a good point.”
When they stepped outside to eat, they saw Lucy, who was also wearing quite heavy clothing, similar to that of Adam.
“Looking good,” Adam said, throwing her a thumbs up.
“Of course I’d look good,” she replied, taking her place beside the children to eat breakfast.
“How annoying,” Jaygak grumbled. “How did you not get into any trouble during the festival? I bet you’re going to get into trouble all the time once you head out!”
Adam chuckled. “That’s right. I planned it all along. I wanted you to suffer with the lack of trouble, so that once we leave and have fun, you’ll understand the pain that I had to go through when you all left without me.”
“But you’re going with Jurot,” Jaygak retorted, huffing angrily.
“Well, yeah, he’s my brother,” Adam said.
Jurot nodded.
“This is discrimination!” Jaygak cried.
Adam laughed, before joining them to eat. Citool had made the food for them, mostly oats with fruit, though there were also some hard boiled eggs for them to eat.
Lanarot was seating next to Adam, who fed her in between bites of his own food, feeding her the near smooth mashed fruit for her.
The others left Adam be, understanding he was currently charging himself up, whatever that meant.
Nirot stared at him. ‘He has not spoken to me yet.’ She glanced aside. ‘It is my fault for avoiding him, but…’
The children passed their prized food to the trio.
“You have to eat well,” Raygak said, handing over a pepper he had saved from the festival.
“Yes,” Taygak said, handing over some nuts.
“Strong with food,” Kitool stated, passing along a piece of fruit.
Damokan and Kalokan each handed over the trio pieces of cheese, which they knew at least Adam and Jurot liked, rather than their own favourite food.
‘How adorable are these kids?’ Adam thought, feeling his heart ache. “I’ll definitely miss you all.”
“Adam, strong,” Taygak said, nodding her head.
“That is right,” Raygak said. “You will come back safe.”
“Hold on, what about Jurot and Lucy?” Adam asked. “Aren’t they strong too?”
“Jurot and Lucy strong,” Katool confirmed. “Adam stronger.”
Adam smirked towards the other two. “Now, now, kids. You can’t be saying things like that.”
“Yeah,” Lucy grumbled.
“Why not?” Jurot asked. “It is true.”
Adam and Lucy both looked to Jurot. ‘Right, they’re Iyrmen.’
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“With Jurot’s intelligence, Lucy’s hardiness, and Adam’s strength, they should return safely,” Shikan said.
“Do we have to worry so much?” Citool asked. “If Jaygak and Kitool were leaving, perhaps there would be some issues, but if it is you three.”
“Right,” Jogak said.
“It’s a little embarrassing if you guys say that in front of us,” Adam said, staring at the three.
“You are harder to kill than even I,” Jogak said. “If I am able to walk out of the Iyr confidently, then you must be able to do the same.”
Adam returned back to feeding his sister. ‘I need to figure out how strong I really am. My strength is too swingy.’
“Thinking already?” Citool joked.
Sonarot let out a soft breath, stopping herself from laughing. “It is very Adam like.”
“Are you really going to bully me before I leave?”
Once they had finished their meal, Adam returned back to the Rot family house. He squatted in the corner of the room, holding Lanarot in a tight hug, his back to the rest so they couldn’t tear her away from him too soon.
Lanarot cooed quietly and grabbed at the back of his shirt as she hugged him too.
“I’m going to miss you so much.”
“Oo.”
“I know, I know, but I need to charge some more. What happens if I don’t come back until after Dawnval? What if I miss your birthday?” Adam kissed her cheek and neck all over, causing her to squeal, before she half spat at his cheek and neck in return as she tried to kiss him.
Lucy stared at Adam too. ‘Are you trying to make me feel guilty?’
Lanarot continued to babble into Adam’s ear, not quite understanding that this would be the last time she’d see him for some time, or the last time ever.
“Don’t grow up too quick, okay?”
“Oon.”
“I’ll bring back all kinds of gifts so be good and listen to mama, okay?”
“Ee.”
“What? What do you mean?” Adam pulled back slightly to stare down at her. “If you don’t, then she’ll keep those pancakes away from you.” He pinched her cheeks gently.
Lanarot clapped her hands and squealed, before reaching up to grab at his ears.
“I’m hogging you all for myself, but you should probably say goodbye to Jurot too.”
“Is there a need?” Jurot asked. “She will not remember.”
“Damn, Jurot,” Adam said. “Did your dad ever hug you?”
“He did,” Jurot replied, almost smiling. “Many times.”
“Has he ever hugged Lanarot?” Adam asked, raising his brows.
“No,” Jurot replied. “He is not here.”
Adam, Lucy, Sonarot, and even Nirot, stared at Jurot expectantly.
Jurot spent a moment to think about what he said. He then picked up Lanarot, holding her at arm’s length. He stared down at her, seeing her tiny little face, her eyes which they shared, and her drooling smile.
Lanarot clapped her hands together excitedly, and looked away shyly, before looking back at him, laughing in joy.
Jurot brought her in close for a tight hug. ‘Would father hug her like this?’ He recalled how his father would embrace him, covering him like a warm blanket. ‘Will you feel safe like this too?’ Jurot crossed his arms around her back and pulled her head to his shoulder, before swaying from side to side gently.
‘Yo, what the hell?’ Adam thought. ‘Is he Level 10 at hugging?’
Lanarot cooed quietly, relaxing in Jurot’s arms, her head in the crook of his neck. She sucked her thumb as they embraced tight.
Sonarot burned the sight into her mind, smiling.
Adam narrowed his eyes, wanting to hug Lanarot some more. ‘No, wait. I gotta let them hug too.’ Adam waited patiently, before looking to Nirot, who was staring at Jurot and the baby. “Once Jurot leaves, you’ll be the one to look after our adorable little sister.”
“Of course,” Nirot said. “I will make sure Aunt is able to look after her well.”
“You’re her cousin too,” Adam said. “You need to pick her up and play with her.”
“What is the need of that?” Nirot asked.
“She’ll be lonely without us.”
“You will be lonely without her.”
“Of course. However, she is used to being played with often, and receiving lots of affection. I don’t think you’ll be as good as me, obviously.” Adam said, smirking. “But you can at least do half, ah, maybe a third, of what I’m capable of, right?”
Nirot glared up at him. “You wish you could do half of what I can!”
“When I return I’ll be sure to ask dear Aunt if you’re done well.”
“Just you wait and see! I shall take her away from you like how you have taken Jay’a and Kit’a from Cousin Jaygak and Cousin Kitool.”
“We’ll see if you can manage that.”
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