How could I forget something so important?

More than that, I had other memories that directly conflicted with it. Recent memories. I remembered googling the killer’s name less than a year ago to confirm he was still in prison.

And mom was there. She knew. She’d known for years, and we’d never talked about it. And despite the many opportunities she had to throw my shortcomings in my face, she’d never mentioned it, or even hinted at it.

The only times I’d ever been to court was during her hearings.

Another memory bubbled to the surface. Cold water plunging down over me as I clung to myself and shivered, words repeated over and over.

You’re a good boy, Matthias. Listen to me. You did nothing. You wandered in here looking for your father and that monster threatened you. Dragged you to the bathroom and tried to drown you. Everything else is a blur, you understand?

Had she taken my place?

I wanted to believe it wasn’t true. That the Lithid’s power was just that all-encompassing.

But the dull chill coupled with the constant pounding in my head said otherwise.

“Move!” Talia roared, slamming into the back of my knees and dead-legging me. The near-silent whisper of a crossbow bolt sailed over me, directly where my head was. Talia left me to pick myself up as she raced to intercept the mongrel racing towards us—more monstrous mutt than dog. They collided in a horrible blur of claws and teeth and yelps.

Nearly twenty feet away, the Lithid advanced towards the clashing dogs, holding its aim and looking for an opening.

It likely had little concern for friendly fire. The thought stirred me out of my daze, throwing me into action. I loaded the first of the poison bolts and spiked it with probability cascade, pulling the trigger and firing it at the lithid. The bolt spiraled through the air and—caught by an errant breeze—struck the lithid dead-center as it dodged away.

It hissed and immediately switched targets, its attention entirely on me.

”You hid it away because of how you felt. For the first time that emptiness within you was filled. The knife brought you joy, unfiltered happiness, and contentment. Things you’d never felt before. Things you swore to never feel again.”

“Shut up!” I shouted, firing another cascade bolt at the lithid.

It was ready this time. Not bothering to dodge, it raised a hand and swatted the bolt away. ticked in the back of my mind, recognizing the ability as

On my left, Talia was losing her clash with the mongrel.

I juked an incoming bolt, using awareness to guide me, and rushed towards her.

”Give me an opening, Talia.”

Talia reacted perfectly, pressing a paw against her attacker’s chin and shoving its head up.

The lithid’s smug voice whispered in my mind. ”You’ve spent so long, trying to suppress the monster you’ve always been. Because society puts people like you in one of two places. Prison or institution. But the world has changed now. You don’t have to pretend anymore.”

I drove my dagger into the mongrel’s side, and twisted the blade immediately, withdrawing as it yelped and snapped at me. Talia sunk her teeth into its neck, pressing her advantage.

screamed, and I flung myself backwards to narrowly dodge a bolt, catching my weight with one hand and pushing hard against the ground—

A ring of fiery pain blazed through my body, expanding from a second bolt that plunged deep into the nerve cluster between my collarbone and neck.

The Lithid advanced, two crossbows in either hand, explaining how the second bolt had come out so fast. It inventoried a hand-crossbow—One I recognized as the shoddy, sightless repurposed piece of plywood that had been my first weapon—and reloaded the second.

A wave of cold deeper than the frozen wasteland of the fourth floor washed over me.

It copied my face, my abilities, and gear I’ve owned, including the poisoned bolts.

I slugged an antidote quickly, noticing with irritation as the Lithid raised an identical potion to its lips. Then, bracing myself, I tore the arrow out before the heat-drain effect could do any more damage.

My vision narrowed to a pinprick.

“You know the truth. You’ve always known. The reaction to the system proves it. We’ve always been teetering on the precipice of savagery. One bad day away from discovering who we really are. But you continue this pointless struggle. When you killed those three Users during the transposition, you didn’t even allow yourself to savor it.”

Sensing it was near, I struck out recklessly with the knife, my blood aflame as poison and antidote raged war within me. The Lithid countered me easily with intercepting my rushed attacks and sending me spinning with a savage backhand.

Even as stars exploded behind my eyes, my mind raced.

How was I supposed to beat this thing if it knew every move I would make? I’d gotten a lucky shot off when it was distracted with Talia, but ever since it started focusing on me, it easily dodged everything I threw at it. At this rate, I’d be finished before my summon put the mongrel down.

What was the plan? There must have been one. I had the foresight to make an audio recording in case the lithid trapped me in a hallucination. I must have had something more. Some strategy.

I staggered away as the Lithid prattled on, trying to buy time.

“I can free you, Matthias.” It whispered. “Give in. Surrender control and bring me to the outside world. Within a day, your burdens will be gone. And I will reforge you into what you were always meant to be.”

A harrowing realization struck me. Talia had said the Lithid fed on suffering. With the dungeon being adaptive, I’d assumed that suffering would be my own. But that wasn’t necessarily true. If I lost here, and the Lithid invaded my mind and took over as it implied, everyone around me would be in danger.

Focus.

Though our motivations were entirely different, the parallels were significant. Both of us intended to use the other as a weapon in the outside world.

But there was a key disparity that had to do with the nature of the adaptive dungeon. The Lithid had been generated exclusively as a monster for me to fight. She’d hinted that Talia’s pups had always been dead. Had I entered the fifth floor with someone else, it would have been entirely different.

If the Lithid died without dropping a core, my life would continue on as it had.

If I died, however, the Lithid would cease to exist.

And it was possibly the only monster in existence with enough self-awareness and external knowledge to piece that together.

It made a critical mistake, telegraphing its intentions. The Lithid didn’t want to kill me. It wanted to break me.

I took a split second to review my inventory

I snorted. The wasn’t meant to be used as bait. It wasn’t meant for anything at all. The randomness of the item was a hint.

There was no plan.

I’d come to the conclusion that if the Lithid could read my mind, there was no way to prepare for it ahead of time—that any concrete strategy could easily be used against me if I stuck to it while the enemy was aware.

The poison of clouded judgement wasn’t for the Lithid. It was for me. Intended to create an opening the Lithid couldn’t predict, once I’d gathered enough information within the dungeon to generate a strategy on the fly. My vision more or less returned, save the corona of violet pulsing around the fringes. I wiped the blood from my mouth and grinned at the Lithid. It was standing a few feet away from me, a strange expression on its face that looked almost wounded.

Behind her, Talia was chasing the mongrel. It darted between parked cars and trash cans, beating a pointless retreat. She’d have it in a matter of moments.

“You can read my mind, right?” I leered. “Then you know that this isn’t a bluff. Because I’ll do whatever’s necessary to win.”

“Wait—” The Lithid reached out a hand and rushed towards me.

But it was too late. I swallowed the poison of clouded judgement and quick drew loading it with three cascade-infused arrows and fired them straight up in the air.

It’s impossible to fire a projectile perfectly upwards. No matter how precise you are, the most minuscule shift will inevitably alter trajectory. I laughed maniacally as the three poisoned arrows reached their apex, and, following the directive of plunged directly towards me.