I was currently sitting in the waiting room, mentally cursing out my ex-boyfriend.

I can't believe he wasn't here. My appointment was in 10 minutes, and he isn't here.

He told me he was going to be with me every step of the way, and he isn't here.

He wasn't even replying to my text messages, which was only pissing me off more.

My phone was buzzing in my pocket, and I prayed to God it was my ex, but anger boiled in my stomach when I saw it was Sam.

"Hello" I muttered, wanting to go smack some sense into my ex-boyfriend.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked and I rolled my eyes

No

"Yeah, I'm fine"

"Are you sure?" He asked again, making me sigh.

"Just annoyed, what did you call for?"

"How long are you staying on the trip with us? I'm going over our plans" He said and I bit my lip, rubbing at my eye out of frustration.

"Till Monday I guess. Got to be back for work Tuesday" I muttered quietly, glancing around at all the anxiously waiting mothers to be.

Their trip went from Thursday to next Sunday, so they were there for over a week, but I worked next Tuesday so I would only be with them for a little over the weekend.

"Okay, are you sure you're okay Leighton?" Sam asked again and I felt my hard shell crack.

"He isn't here" I whispered, cracking as I mentally groaned at the stinging my eyes started doing.

I was tired of crying over him. I was tired of crying because I missed him, crying because I'm having his baby, and he isn't here, crying because I had these expectations in my head and I was tired of being let down when they weren't met.

"Who isn't there? Where are you?" Sam asked, sounding concerned and I felt bad for worrying him.

I shouldn't have said anything.

"I have an ultrasound. He isn't here" I said quietly and It was silent for a moment, making me think the call dropped, until Sam inhaled and spoke again.

"Drop a pin I'm coming" He said and my eyes widened.

"What? No! It's fine really!" I quickly spoke, the person across from me eyeing me before looking back at her magazine.

God I hated nosy people.

"Leighton, drop the pin. I'm already in the car. Let me be your friend. Don't push us away. Please" He spoke softly at the end and I sighed, nodding slowly, pulling my phone away from my ear and sending him my location.

"I did" I replied quietly.

"Be there in 10 minutes Leighton" Sam said before hanging up and the tears rolled down my face.

"Are you okay?" The girl sitting two seats over, quietly asked.

"I'm okay" I gave her a small smile, leaning back in the chair and crossing my legs.

I ended up getting a text from Gabe telling me his boss wouldn't let him leave. I got it from a work perspective, but I was still upset he wasn't here.

We were supposed to be doing this together.

Colby had gotten back to me on which poses he liked best for the artwork, so I started figuring out the sketch for it when I heard my phone ring and I pulled it back out, seeing it was Sam.

"Hello?"

"I'm here! Where do I go?" He asked and I stayed on the phone, leading him through the hospital

I couldn't help but smile at the memory from when Kat came, and I had to do the same thing.

I saw Sam walk in the room and I leapt out of my chair, hugging him. "Thank you!" I whispered and I felt him nod against me.

"Wouldn't want to be anywhere else Leigh" He grinned at me. "Believe it or not, I consider you a friend, and friends are there for friends" Sam gave me a side hug and I saw the magazine lady look at me, making me feel uncomfortable. Thankfully before we could even sit down, my name was called. "Leighton Fox?"

"Is it fine if my friend comes in?" I asked and she nodded.

She took my weight and Sam looked away, making me smile. We went through the routine stuff before walking into the room to do an ultrasound.

"This is your last ultrasound till 16 weeks" She said and I nodded.

I was kind of nervous to go a whole month without one, but I knew I was lucky to have had so many to begin with.

Now that I was going to go into the second trimester, they were going to be less frequent up until closer to my due date, and it honestly made me kind of nervous.

I knew I had more ultrasounds in my first trimester than normal moms did, which I was grateful for, especially since it was my first baby.

Usually your first ultrasound in your first trimester is anywhere between 8-12 weeks. Whereas I've had 2 or 3 in the first trimester. Usually if you have more frequent ultrasounds, there is a reason for it. Especially since there isn't much to see so early on.

"This is your first belly ultrasound" My nurse Emily, cheered and I blushed, glancing towards Sam.

"That's a good thing I guess. I don't really feel like taking off my pants in front of my non romantic friend" I laughed and she nodded, reaching for the gel.

"I completely understand! I will need you to unbutton your pants though" She said and I saw Sam smirk.

"Would you like me to look away Leighton?" He teased, and I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up Sam" I grumbled, laying back to unbutton my pants to push them down a little.

"What does she mean that this is your first belly ultrasound?" Sam asked and Emily smirked.

"Up until today, Ms. Fox here has been having a tiny little camera shoved up inside her to see the little baby" Emily told him and I looked over to see Sam's face forming a look of shock, disgust and confusion making me laugh. "So how did you guys meet?" Emily, my favorite OBGYN nurse, asked before warning me that the gel might be cold.

"We're roommates actually. The father got stuck at work, so Sam offered to come" I told her and she nodded, plopping a little bit of the gel on my tummy.

"You have a tiny little bump!" She noted and I nodded, grinning, proud of my little bump.

"A bump? You have a bump?" Sam asked and I nodded, pointing at the little pudge that was a little bit bigger than yesterday.

"It doesn't look like a bump" Sam looked at me weirdly making me laugh.

"Thank you for being respectful but it definitely is a little fat pudge people call a bump. I'm proud of my little fat pudge" I grinned and Sam chuckled, shaking his head at me.

"Alright momma, ready to see your baby?" She asked and I nodded, turning to face the little monitor.

She moved the little wand around the gel, spreading it across my tummy. "Your baby's heart rate is perfect Leighton" Emily noted and I grinned, relief washing over me.

Thank God. One less thing to worry about.

"Here is your little one" She said and my eyes focused on the baby on the screen, tears welling up before falling over.

"Woah! That's an actual baby. Like the head, body, fingers" Sam spoke in astonishment.

"Sure is! This little one just has to grow big and strong. They get their organs and bones pretty early one" Emily smiled over at Sam and I wiped my eyes, feeling proud of baby Fox.

"Can I take a video?" Sam asked and Emily nodded.

Sam pulled out his phone and after that I ignored him, looking at the tiny little fingers and watching the heart rate beat steadily.

It was the most perfect sound.

I couldn't decide if I'd love hearing their heart beat more of their first laugh. I guess both are equally as amazing.

"I can't believe this is happening! They already look so cute" I squealed a little, seeing their tiny little fingers.

I couldn't help but feel guilty.

I knew I didn't want to put them up for adoption, which is probably why I didn't bring it up to Emily, but I knew I couldn't afford this baby...

"They do look like the sweetest little baby" Emily moved the want around.

"Ten fingers, now let's see if we can look at those toes. I'm going to turn the screen towards me because sometimes you can see the gender" She said and my eyes widened.

"Really?"

"Yeah the gender should be formed already, but it takes a while to see. It's not impossible, just rare to see it this soon" She said and I nodded, not letting me get my hopes up.

I still didn't know if I wanted to know the gender yet, but I knew Gabe did and it felt wrong to find out before him.

Then again, he was supposed to be here.

"And ten perfect little toes. Your baby looks just fine Leighton" Emily smiled at me, turning the monitor back, and just as my eyes landed on it, we watched their little hand move making me smile and Sam grinned "You have a baby inside you Leighton!"

"That I do Sam. I've known that for a while" I giggled and he rolled his eyes, focusing back on the black and white screen.

"It's just so cool to see. Like... that's a human. I'm looking at a human inside your belly! That's so sick Leigh! You're growing a human in your belly, and this is proof!" Sam pointed at the screen and giggled, nodding at his excitement, seeing Emily smile at him.

We watched a little more whilst Emily took some pictures. "I'll grab you a rag" She said, talking about the gel on my tummy. "I'll also be back with your pictures!"

"That was so cool Leigh!" Sam's eyes were lit up like a boy on Christmas and I found it cute.

It felt nice to know people actually cared.

Gabe was never THIS excited over the ultrasounds.

I could only imagine the way he'd react if it was his own baby. I knew it was unlikely, but I really wished I could be there when he and whom I'd assume would be Kat, had their first baby. I already knew he'd cry.

"It is pretty cool. Thank you for coming Sam"

"I completely understand why Katrina loves coming with" He chuckled and I nodded.

"Gonna have to fight her for it next time" I teased him and Emily had come back in with a washcloth so the gel didn't ruin my shirt.

We rubbed my belly clean before I redid the button of my jeans, and pulled down my flowy tank top.

"Here is the bump now that I'm standing" I moved my top to show the bloating to Sam, standing so my ribs were facing him.

"Look at that! There is a tiny little bump!"

"You can touch it if you want" I repositioned my top and Sam carefully put his hand on my stomach, seeming uneasy.

"You alright?" I asked and he nodded.

"It's just kinda strange to know there is a baby right there. Anyway I'm going to go find a bathroom real quick, where do you want to meet up?" He asked, reaching for the door handle

"I thought I was the pregnant one?" I teased. "I can meet you by the bathroom. I need to get my ultrasound photos"

Emily came back and handed me my pictures. "Dr. Hughes will be seeing you at your 16 week appointment. Do you want to know the gender of the baby? We can usually see between 16 to 21 weeks. Depends how shy the little one is" Emily informed me, grabbing a clipboard.

"I don't know yet" I confessed, and Emily nodded, filling out the paper on the clipboard.

It was quiet for a moment, and I finally decided it was time.

If I was going to go through with it, I needed to bring it up sooner rather than later so I had time to pick someone.

I took a deep breath, causing her to look over at me.

"Is there someone I can talk to about putting my baby up for adoption?" I asked and I gasped when I heard the door open, and there stood Sam.

~

"Sam! Wait!" I called out, following him to his car.

"Why would you want to do that?" He asked, abruptly stopping behind someone else's car.

"I'm thinking about my baby's future Sam!" I cried, watching the anger and disappointment fill his eyes. His pupils dilated.

"Why did you do this, Leighton?" He asked and I was taken aback.

"What do you mean?"

"Why did you involve us, if you're just going to give it up!"

"YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO KNOW!" I yelled and I saw his jaw clench.

I've never seen Sam mad before, and it was definitely something I didn't want to see often.

"BUT I DO! AND NOW I CARE! You let me care about this little baby, be excited for this little baby, when you've known all along you were just going to give it up!?" He yelled, and I could hear the hurt in his voice, killing me "You let everyone be involved just to give up?" He asked again and I felt like every emotional barrier I had kept up, caved in.

I was tired of people acting like I was a bad person, when all I wanted was the best life I could give my baby.

"IT'S MY BABY! IT'S MY LIFE! I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO COME!" I cried, feeling his judgment and disappointment drip off his tone.

I was tired of fighting. Tired of trying to plead my case. Make them understand. Why did they care what I did? Why don't they understand?

"Who knows?" he asked and I closed my eyes, trying to compose myself.

"Just Aaliyah." I responded, anxiety burning a hole in my chest as I waited for his reaction. He was quiet for a moment, but I couldn't stop myself before it all spilled out "You weren't supposed to know! Why are you acting like you're the father? You're nothing to this baby! Why do you care!?" I sobbed and I saw his face fall, but I was too far gone to care.

"Is that what you think?" He asked and I nodded, wiping at my face. "I care because I thought we were becoming friends. I found out you were pregnant, I kept your secret, I tried to be there for you, to help you, and now you're just giving up!? I've kept your secret from Colby, MY BEST FRIEND, for WEEKS and you're giving up?!" He shouted and I quickly shook my head.

"I CAN'T AFFORD THIS BABY! YOU DON'T THINK I WANT TO KEEP IT? I WANT SO DESPERATELY TO KEEP THIS BABY SAM! BUT I CAN'T! I CAN'T BE SELFISH! I CAN'T GIVE THIS BABY A LIFE IT DESERVES! SOMEONE ELSE WILL DO BETTER! I TRIED SO FUCKING HARD TO DO THIS, BUT AT THE END OF THE DAY I WILL ALWAYS FAIL. I RATHER BE KNOWN AS THE DEADBEAT MOM WHO DIDN'T WANT HER BABY, THAN THE MOTHER WHO CAN'T BUY DIAPERS OR BOTTLES OR PAY FOR A CRIB! I CAN'T DO IT! If I knew before that this was what I wanted to do, I would've told you! But the more I think about the logistics of caring for this baby, the more I realize that I can't do it, and it would just end in heartbreak either way!" I cried and I fell to the ground, covering my face.

"Leigh" Sam spoke softly, crouching down next to me and I shook my head.

"I can't do it" I whispered and he pulled my hands off my face, shaking his head.

"You can do it, Leighton! If you let us in, we'll help you. But you have to tell Colby. We can't keep lying to him. You aren't alone. I know you're afraid of how he'll react, but I truly think you're overthinking this. I think he'll be upset for a bit, but he'll get over it and I'm sure be just as excited as Kat and I. Don't give up your baby. I saw the way you looked at that screen. That wasn't a look of someone who wants to give away their baby. That's the look of a mother who is willing to fight like hell for their baby. You're already fighting Leighton. If you really didn't think you could keep this baby, you would've done something about it. That little one in your tummy has a heartbeat Leigh. It's already counting on you. You are who this baby needs, not some rich white family who will hire a nanny and throw them into private school. This is YOUR baby! YOU get to make the choices, but I can't let you make the wrong ones. I can't let you give up this baby due to money problems. Love has no bound Leighton. Don't let the concern of how you'll do it stop you. I'm upset because I know you can do it, and I feel like you're doubting yourself. I may not have known you for a long time, but I already know you're a hard worker. You CAN do this, you just need to believe in yourself! Stop worrying about HOW you're going to. In the end, we always figure it out. It's okay to be scared, but don't let fear give your baby away" He pulled me into his chest and I couldn't help but giggle, thinking about how odd the security tapes must look of us fighting in the parking lot, and then sitting on the dirty ground, hugging.

"I feel like a failure if I take the handouts" I confessed, wiping at my face.

"Okay. Well, let's go home and figure out a plan" he said and I couldn't help but smile. "That's what Aaliyah said. She said we would figure it out"

"She's a smart girl. We care about you, Leighton. The second I saw that little baby on the ultrasound machine, I already knew I would fight like hell for them, and I'm not even the father. I didn't even know about this baby until a little while ago. WE want you to keep this baby. WE are willing to help you. WE will figure this out. Do you WANT to keep this baby?" He asked and I nodded. "Then let's get your pregnant butt up off the floor so we can go home and think about how we will do this" he said, lifting me up.

"I have to meet with Aaliyah" I sighed, clearing my throat and wiping at my nose.

"Okay, then we will do it after. Do you have any plan on how you'll tell Colby?" he asked and I shook my head.

"I'm too scared. I don't want him mad at me, especially after we finally had our truce"

"Truce?"

"We decided to start over. Forgive and forget. He'll never forgive me for "forgetting" to tell him this"

"Leighton, I think the best way to tell him is to rip it off like a band aid"

I was currently sitting in Starbucks, drinking a small iced fruity drink because I read that caffeine makes your baby active, and I don't feel like needing to pee.

Carrie Underwood's lyrics he's probably buyin' her some fruity little drink 'Cause she can't shoot whiskey were in my head as I sipped my drink making me laugh to myself.

I always heard that you weren't supposed to have coffee because it could stunt your baby's growth or whatever. It's not like I was a coffee person in the first place, but I learned that was actually a myth, and it's more so recommended that you don't have a lot of caffeine, because it makes your baby active and basically makes your life hell since they kick your ribs and make you have to pee a lot, so I wasn't taking any chances today.

I was only sitting here for a few minutes before I spotted Aaliyah. I watched her walk over to me before asking her "Do you want anything from here?" The coffee smell is really starting to effect my nausea now.

"Um, no I'm good" Aaliyah said softly and I nodded.

"Can we go sit outside? The coffee smell makes me nauseous. I didn't think this through" I chuckled softly and she nodded.

We sat down at a table outside, and it was quiet for a moment.

"I'm sorry" Aaliyah and I said at the same time, making each other laugh.

"This fight was stupid, and mainly because I was overly dramatic, I'm sorry. The pregnancy is fucking with how I react to things, and it's really pissing me off" I confessed, rolling my lips inwards before pausing them, feeling awkward.

"It's okay. I shouldn't have asked you about money. We should've known better since High School" She chuckled and I copied her, nodding.

"I should've just been honest with you. I haven't been working for a while, and I used the rest of my money on helping with bills. It was one of the stressors that kinda led to the breakup. I'm sorry for lashing out and bringing up your dad. I know you don't live off your dad's money like you used to. I'm sorry" I apologized and she nodded.

"I know we both said we were moving past whatever that was in Target, but I just wanted to make sure we really cleared the air" Aaliyah gave me a small smile and I nodded, leaning back against the chair as I played with my straw.