August 30, 1999

Today, Jenna, Gina, Scott, Daniel and I were all sitting beside the pond. Jenna was explaining how guys in our grade don't know how to kiss. Scott said, "Emily could teach me how." I said, "Okay, sure." He just stood there, looking uncomfortable. He hadn't expected me to agree.

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Scott, you retard, it's not that hard. Go like this." And all of a sudden, Daniel was sitting on top of me facing me, so he was straddling me and holding onto my shoulders. He leaned in as if to kiss me, but I freaked out and pushed him away.

Scott insisted, "Come on, Emily, teach me how to kiss!" Daniel wandered over to the water, obviously removing himself from the situation. I sighed and looked up at Scott. "Okay." He leaned over, and it was actually a pretty good kiss. It was different. My upper lip was touching his upper lip, and my bottom lip was touching his bottom lip, so our mouths weren't really fit together. He reached up and put his hand on my boob, outside my shirt, and I shoved him off me.

Afterward I couldn't believe I had kissed Scott. I decided not to tell anyone. When Scott and Daniel had to go, we all gave them hugs. Daniel again leaned in to kiss me, but I turned my face and pushed him away. [Daniel really wouldn't take getting pushed away for an answer.]

I am honestly such a tease. I don't want to be like that, though. I have no clue why I am. There must be something WRONG with me.