after a little while, all the boys arrived at the cafè and joined chan and felix at their table.

chan and felix were sat across from one another, seungmin took an empty seat beside chan with jeongin joining on the otherside, and minho and jisung sat rather close together in the two empty seats beside felix.

majority of them were having a great time. they were laughing and talking as they always did, but two of the boys were rather silent.

jeongin and felix, the two boys to typically be smiling the most, were now the ones that were silent.

felix watched with a half hearted smile as his friends interacted, and jeongin sat there with a frown on his face.

jeongin played with the coffee stirrer as he stared down at his steaming cup, and avoided looking at any of his friends.

he was starting to wish he never even showed up to the cafè.

"hey minho, do you mind if we switch seats?" felix asked as he noticed jeongin's odd behavior.

"i don't mind." minho shrugged as he began to stand.

"you're moving away from me sunshine?" chan asked as he grabbed onto felixs hand to stop him from leaving.

"im going to be right at the other end, don't worry so much." felix laughed a bit as he continued to walk towards the other seat.

chan wanted felix to stay with him, but he knew felix didn't see the feelings chan had for him. felix was oblivious when it came to flirting.

"hey innie," felix smiled towards the boy as he sat down."

"hey," jeongin said without even picking his head up.

"is everything alright?" felix asked worriedly.

"fine."

"it doesn't seem fine." felix frowned as he reached across the table to hold the other boys hand.

jeongin slowly lifted his head, his eyes seeming glossy and exhausted as the bags around them were making his eyes appeared swelled.

"have you been crying?" felix questioned quietly so the other boys wouldn't hear.

"you havent?" jeongin asked as he cocked an eyebrow.

"what do you mean?"

"changbin and hyunjin obviously like eachother, doesnt that hurt you?" jeongin asked as the tears began to prick at his eyes.

"i just want changbin to be happy." felix shrugged, "hyunjins a good guy, one of my closest friends even... i know he'll treat changbin the way he deserves."

"how are you always so good about this?" jisung turned as he chimed into the conversation, catching the attention of the remaining boys.

"what?" felix responded nervously.

"you always, and i mean always, put others before yourself. you constantly just say shit like 'well if it makes him happy,' like no felix! when will your happiness matter?" jisung raised his voice slightly, starting felix a bit.

"ji, calm down." minho placed his hand on jisungs shoulder, but the boy just shook him off.

"no, i won't calm down!" jisung reaponded, "felix, we're all so worried about you! have you even eaten anything today? or better yet, when was the last time you ate a full meal?"

"jisung..." felix scratched the back of his head nervously, "this is about jeongin... not me."

jeongin looked over at felix, narrowing his eyes at the latter, "no... no it's not. this is not about me."

jeongin shook his head as he let out a loud sigh, "felix, i may be sad about hyunjin not feeling the same way towards me that i feel towards him, but that's it. i'm just a little sad. you are going through something much worse, and none of us understand it."

"there's nothing to understand!" felix put his hands up defensively.

chan sat there, his blood beginning to boil from the way they were badgering felix.

he wanted to ease into the conversation slowly, not completely blindside and attack felix.

"that's such a lie." jeongin scoffed.

"felix, just talk to us, we don't want you hurting." jisung said as he placed his arm around the boy.

"i said there's nothing! why can't you just accept that!" felix wasnt angry, he was just scared. he hated being called out for his feelings, he thought he was hiding them well.

"that's enough guys," chan cut in before anyone could question felix further, "just let it go."

"just tell me the last time you ate a full meal was and i'll stop." jisung said, ignoring what chan had said.

felix looked at jisung with sorrowful eyes and tried his best to not let the tears fall.

eating was difficult for felix. when his anxiety got to unmanageable levels, food was always the last thing on his mind. even one small bite made him sick to even think about.

"lix," seungmin finally spoke up, "we all know it's hard for you... but we're your friends, we would never judge you."

"please stop guys, im really okay!" felix said, knowing damn well he hadn't eaten a real meal all week. he had been picking at snacks whenever slight hunger would arise, but he went most of his days without food.

he hated his nervous stomach, felix wished he could just eat, but he was far too afraid he would become ill if he did. it was his anxiety talking and he knew that, yet he still couldn't get passed it.

"i really just wanted to check in on you innie," felix sighed as he hated the attention that was brought on to him, "i think im going to head home now."

the boys wanted to stop felix, but even with their pleas for him to stay, he still continued to walk until he was out of their sights.

a.n.

never attack someone into telling you their feelings>:(

i hate being forced to talk about my feelings