chan ran out of school that day, not caring about the remainder of his classes. he just had to prove changbin wrong, he could save felix.

chan knocked on the boys door repeatedly, waiting for him to open it, but instead of felix, someone else was there.

"chan," felixs grandmother gave chan a confused look, "shouldnt you be in school?"

"probably, but is felix here?" chan questioned.

"no, he's at school." she laughed.

"no he's not..." chan stated worriedly.

"what? he didn't go to school today? i could've sworn he did..." she thought back to this morning, "he was late. maybe that's why you didn't see him."

"can i just go check his room please?" chan asked, felixs grandmother nodded and let the boy inside.

chan ran up the stairs and into felixs room where he saw the boy laying down on his bed with headphones in.

"felix," chan called out, "felixxxx."

"hmm?" felix opened his eyes as he pulled one headphone out.

"whyd you leave school?" chan asked.

"i could ask you the same thing..." felix trailed off as he sat up in bed.

"there's like an hour left, it's not a big deal that i left." chan shrugged as he stepped closer to felix.

"you still left."

"whatever felix, that's now what i came here to talk about." chan shook his head, trying to get back on track.

"then what did you come to talk about?" felix asked with a confused expression on his face.

"you," chan said simply, "why'd you say the stuff you did earlier?"

"i thought you guys wanted me to be honest about my feelings." felix fiddled with his thumbs instead of focusing on chan.

"we do."

"well that's why i said it." felix stated.

"why'd you suddenly change your mind on sharing your feelings?" chan questioned, not buying what felix was saying.

"maybe because im tired of being alone." felix threw up his arms in defeat.

"you're not alone felix, don't you see that? everyone cares about you!" chan said passionately.

"changbin doesn't." felix mumbled.

"why is he the only one that matters?" chan asked through grit teeth.

"he's not."

"that's what you make it seem like." chan was livid at this point. it was always changbin when it came to felix, that's the only person who felix ever thought of.

"well because i love him still and it hurts me that he could just stop caring so easily. how can he just shut me out and feel nothing?"

"felix, i've told you over and over again he's not good for you."

"yeah i know," felix scoffed.

"so why do you keep letting him affect you like this?" chan questioned, trying to calm himself back down.

"letting him affect me? LETTING HIM?" felix began to raise his voice, "then tell me bang chan, how am i supposed to not care when the person i love hurts me!"

after hearing felix's words, chan had enough of that conversation. chan thought he was angry before, but this was a whole other level of anger.

"you should know i do that every time you open your mouth about changbin." chan snapped at the latter.

"w-what..."

"you heard me."

"what do you mean by that?" felix asked nervously.

"you felix, you only care about him. no matter what i do for you, you still look right past me." chan stood up off the bed and stared down at felix.

"what?"

"i'm in love with you felix, but you already knew that." chan words came out of his mouth in a way that made it seem as though he had turned evil. felix didn't like this side to chan.

"n-no i didn't." felix lied.

"YES YOU DID," chan shouted as he got in felix's face, "i told you at the fucking party."

"i thought you didn't remember that night..." felix knew he had been caught, but he didn't know how.

"i may not have been as drunk as i seemed." chan smiled a bit, but he still looked angry. the smile was far from genuine, and only seemed to be malevolent.

"you lied to me?" felix asked at a low volume.

"you used me." chan retorted.

"i never used you!" felix said defensively as he felt the tears prick his eyes.

"you always have! you've taken advantage of me all summer and continued to do so. it's so obvious that i'm in love with you, yet all you do is talk about seo fucking changbin. what's so great about him anyway?" chan raised his voice slightly, having been fed up with felix mentioning changbin to him so often and being so oblivious to his feelings.

"h-he has helped me through a lot..." felix worded his sentence poorly.

"and what did i do all summer?" chan asked, being a bit offended.

"chan-"

"just stop felix, i'm tired of this. i've come to accept that you will never ever love me the way that i love you. hell you won't even learn to appreciate me... if you end up alone, you've done it to yourself."

"what's that's supposed to mean?"

"you care for the wrong people. you chase after those who treat you the worst.

you think changbin loved you? if he loved you would he have gone running to hyunjin? you think jeongin's your best friend? well where is he now?

what about jisung? where was he when you needed him over the summer? oh that's right, HE WAS SLEEPING WITH MINHO.

oh and don't forget that you and hyunjin used to be extremely close. what happened there? he left you for changbin.

so let's go through this, jisung chose minho over you, changbin chose hyunjin, hyunjin chose changbin... now who did jeongin choose? i'm sure i could guess this without you having to tell me."

felix sat there silent with tears welling in his eyes. he didn't want to hear what chan had to say.

"hyunjin," he hissed making it sound like his words were poisonous, "i heard him on the phone with you when he was walking with hyunjin. i also saw you on the other side of the parking lot staring at them. how does it feel to lose everyone in your life?"

"i still have you and seungmin..."

"you never had seungmin, he tells you to stop touching him whenever you try to hug him... and you don't have me either, not anymore."

"chan wait!"

"wait for what? you don't love me. you were never going to tell me that either. you were just going to keep on using me for your own benefit.

tell me felix, why didn't you turn me down? why didn't you ever talk to me about it?"

"i didn't want to lose you..."

"ah... that's the exact answer i was expecting, how selfish!" chan spat at felix before walking out the door, never looking back, not even for a moment.

felix sunk back down in his bed, pulling his sheets over his head as he heavy sobs escaped him. the tears were pouring down his cheeks and seemed like they would never stop.

felix was alone.

a.n.

oh shiiiiiiit

did y'all expect it to go this way? :)