Rule #7: This should be a given, but trusting anyone on Neverland is idiotic. Lost Boys are loyal beyond belief, and Pan, well... Powerful people tell powerful lies.

"Today was victory against the mermaids," Pan said to us as we dragged ourselves out of the water. "Our Baelfire would be proud."

We gave an exhausted, enthusiastic cheer. As long as we'd done the best we could to avenge his death, we were satisfied.

"I would tell you to be prepared for a retaliation, but," he snickered, "The mermaids don't have legs. That being said, I'll say this one more time: all of you, stay away from Mermaid Cove. Understand?" Affirmative grunts all over. "Good. Now to celebrate!"

The boys ran screaming through the forest towards the camp. I was about to join them when he called out to me.

"Squirt. A word."

I turned, pretty sure I had done something wrong. When I saw the look on his face, I was even more confused. He looked almost... proud. "Walk with me?"

"Sure."

We walked in silence for a while. The waves crashed soothingly on the shore, occasional red streaks the only reminders of what had happened only a few hours before.

"You did well today," Pan finally said. "Surprisingly well."

"How would you know?" I asked. "You weren't there."

He laughed in his better-than-thou way. "True enough, but I was watching. You have talent, squirt. Talent that I'm sure you won't want to utilize."

What kind of talent would I not want to have? That didn't make much sense, but then, this was Pan. Very little of what he did made sense. My confusion must have shown on my face, because he snickered.

"Magic, Lily. Whether you know it or not, you are naturally gifted in it." He seemed to be heartily amused by the irony.

Myself, not so much. "You're saying that I was doing magic. Me."

"You. Now that I think about it, its not so surprising. You have that personality." Alright, no question. He was laughing at me.

"But how do you know?" I asked. I was very close to panicking. "I mean, I haven't done a spell since I got here, right?"

"As a matter of fact, that's not true," Pan smirked. "Just a bit ago, you used a compound spell on yourself."

"But that... That was you."

"It wasn't." We'd stopped walking, so he plopped down on the sand. "The spell I used made breathing unnecessary. You, on the other hand, made it possible."

He seemed to be expecting me to sit with him, but I didn't care. "I don't understand. The boys weren't breathing?"

"I made it so that they didn't have to. You didn't, either, but my best guess is that you were subconsciously trying to show me up, like you normally do." He grinned at me. "You're never satisfied, are you?"

I let the snide comment slide, a little too overwhelmed to do much else. "So let's say I did use magic. How does that show that I'm so powerful? It could have just been a fluke, right? I could just be super low level?"

"You could," he agreed, "If you'd cast pretty much any other spell. Using a spell to breathe is powerful stuff, but to do it without trying is unheard of. As I said--" he lay back on the sand and closed his eyes, basking in the sun"--a talent you wouldn't want to utilize, given your fear of magic. Bit of a waste, if I do say so myself."

Was it? Yesterday, if he'd told me this, I would have disagreed heartily. Any unused magic was good magic in my book. Now that I knew that it wasn't all painful...

"What are you saying?" I asked, finally sitting down next to him.

He turned his head to look at me like I was an idiot. Maybe I was. "I'd teach you, of course. Without control, you could become unstable. Dangerous. With the proper training, you could be powerful beyond belief."

"And it would be my choice? Like, completely? And I could choose to stop whenever?"

"Of course." Pan grinned at me playfully. "You might not be a boy, but you're one of us. I won't make you do more than you want to."

"Then..." What was I saying? "I'll do it." What was I thinking? "I'll train with you. Just... God, I'm going to sound like such a girl for a second, but don't hurt me okay? Don't make me regret this."

To most people, the smile would have been sinister. To a Lost One, it was a promise. "I wouldn't even think of it."

*~*~*

"You are seeing the irony in this, right?" Felix laughed later on. "It's not just me?"

I smacked him lightly. "I see it, of course I do, but stop pointing it out, you ass!"

"Alright, alright. So Pan offered to teach you how to control your powers," he raised an eyebrow in an uncanny likeness of the boy, "And you accepted. Can I ask why? You were literally having panic attacks about magic two days ago, sweetheart."

I thought about it, but even I didn't know for sure. "Well, at first it was because he said I'd be dangerous if I didn't."

"But...?" Felix suddenly sounded wary. Suspicious.

"But... I don't know now," I admitted. "It feels like it's a good idea, but I don't like it, you know?"

He seemed to be wieghing his next words carefully. "You're sure that's all it is? You're positive?"

"I just told you, I don't know what it is," I snapped.

He held up his hands in defeat, but his eyes flashed intensely with... something. "I'm just a little worried, alright? That you might..." he trailed off uncertainly.

'I'm worried that you might...' Oh dear god, no! I laughed hysterically. "You think I'm falling for him? For Peter Pan? Honestly, Felix, I thought you were smarter than that. I would never. I'm unpredictable, not crazy!"

He seemed to relax a little. At least, the intense look left his gaze. "As long as it stays that way. Pan... isn't an easy person to care about. I should know," he laughed. "I've been his closest friend for centuries, and it's hard as hell."

Centuries... How did he manage it? Being around Pan for so long, even forming lasting bonds with the boy... it sounded like torture. At the very least, it sounded impossible. Pan was detatched from us. He cared about his boys, sure; that much would have been obvious to anyone. But he didn't seem to want to form one-on-one relationships with us. It was smart, I realized that now. When boys were on Neverland, they were in constant danger of horrible death, and experience over enough time would make anyone difficult to reach.

"How do you do it?" I finally asked Felix. "You're the only one he really trusts at all. Why is that?"

He shrugged. "I've been here almost since the beginning. I never questioned Pan, never asked for his trust or his attention. I think maybe the reason he let me in is because I never asked him to."

The logic was completely backwards and nonsensical and perfect for Pan. Clearly, Felix had given this some serious thought himself. God knew he'd had the time.

"Hey, you're thinking too hard about this," he chuckled. "Give it time and stay alive. No one really knows how Pan works, but be patient and he'll throw you a bone once in a while. Piece them all together and you'll eventually get the whole skeleton."

"Now who's thinking too hard?" I teased. "Go to sleep, Felix."

He winked at me playfully. "Only if you do too, little girl. It's past your bedtime."

"Ass."

"Midget."

"Go to sleep."

"You first."

"You're going to get us in so much trouble."

*~*~*

Darkness again. But now it pressed in on me from every angle, cracking bones and pressing the air from my lungs mercilessly. There was no screaming, no way to even fathom outside help. Then something changed. A tiny pinprick of light glinted in the distance. I fought my way towards it, trying to free myself. It got brighter and brighter...

Something was covering my mouth. I panicked. My eyes flew open and I was immediately alert. My gaze locked with pure green.

"Good morning, squirt," Pan said, taking his hand off my face. "You were making quite a ruckus, and Felix needed a full night's sleep for once. Couldn't have you screaming and ruining all that work, could I?"

I glared at him. I had thought-- stupidly, I knew now --that Pan was unaware of my nightmares. But I felt a pang of guilt about Felix, as I always did. I didn't intend to wake him up all the time, but he was always bringing me out of nightmares at the expense of his own sleep.

Pan looked at his hand dully. "You drooled on me. I hope I didn't get rabies," he said, wiping it on my arm. I narrowed my eyes. "Oh, don't look at me like that, you would have been out here today anyway."

"And why is that?"

"Oh, so she speaks now, does she? Some of the boys talk about your morning moods. I see that they weren't exaggerations." His eyebrow was creeping up annoyingly. "You need to be somewhere away from the camp to train until you have more control over your powers."

I groaned and leaned against a tree dramatically. "We're starting today?"

"Well, have you changed your mind?" He sounded bored, but I knew it was fake. There was obviously something under it. I just couldn't tell if it was hope or resignation.

"Of course I haven't, but the sun isn't even up yet," I complained. Immediately, sunlight shone through the trees.

"Out of excuses." Pan winked at me mischievously.

"Smartass," I muttered."I'm not awake enough for your games."

He shrugged. "Interesting. But here's the thing: I don't care. You need to learn to control yourself quickly now that you've discovered your powers. I'm not going to be pleasant about it."

Oh, what a surprise. "Where do we start?"

It was painful in its normality. Hours upon hours of Pan's bored voice, telling me what to do, how to think, how to act, and that "You've got to focus, squirt. Focus is the most important thing in magic. Without it, any spell you try to cast will spiral out of control faster than you can figure out how to stop it. Focus, squirt. Focus."

"I'm trying, but its kind of hard with you yelling at me," I snapped. I knew I would regret it as soon as the words left my mouth.

"Believe me, Lily, this is the least distracting thing you're going to come across around here." Pan rolled his eyes. "Maybe I'm going about this all wrong. I know you, squirt. You need a more... direct approach."

"What--" A green fog enveloped me and when it cleared, we were on Skull Rock. On the top of Skull Rock. Which is high up. And steep. And high up. And slippery. And very high up. "Are you trying to kill me, you bastard?"

Pan laughed. "You need to learn how to focus under pressure. You're someone who only learns by doing, not hearing. You don't like it here? Then get down. It's that simple." Without another word, he vnished in a puff of green smoke.

For once, fear didn't cloud my mind; it sharpened it. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to be down. I felt a physical pull in my gut and suddenly I was on the beach. Pan grinned at me and waved his hand. The air shimmered slightly, then went back to normal.

"You did it." There was that almost-proud tone of voice again.

When I didn't answer, he got a little closer to me to gauge my reaction. His eyes widened. Why? I thought. Didn't I do it right? Why does he look so damn surprised?

"You've got to breathe, Lily. Even I can't bring you back if you suffocate yourself to death." He snickered a little.

Breathe? I am breathing. What's he talking about? The edges of my vision started to darken and I finally realized what he was talking about. Okay, I'm hyperventialting. I have to calm down or I'll pass out. Calm down, calm down, calm down, clam down, calmdowncalmdowncalmdowncalmdown---

I woke up in my tent. The camp was quiet, so I assumed the boys were out hunting or playing. Then, all at once, everything came rushing back to me. Pan, Skull Rock, the magic... Holy crap, I did magic. I did magic, and it worked!

'Well, we're certainly not doing that again," a snarky British voice said. Pan sat next to me. "It was a bit too stressful for you, it seems."

"I'm doing it again." I tried to sit up, but the world wouldn't stop spinning for some reason so I laid back down. "I am."

He raised an eyebrow. "You had a panic attack so severe the last time that you've been unconcious for a day and a half. It wouldn't be smart."

"But it worked," I protested. "The panicking was just because I wans't prepared."

"I never put my Lost Ones in danger," he said stonily. "Even the ones that are pains in the ass."

"I'll do it anyway."

"I said no."

I snorted. "Sorry to bruise your oversized ego, but I don't care. I'm doing it."

"Lily. I don't want you doing this. It's not safe."

I blew out a frustrated breath. "Then figure out a safe way to train me that's as effective as that."

"Trust me," he smirked, "I'm doing just that."

A/N: Holy hell, two chapters in two days? It has to be a new record. Aaaaaaaanyway, Happy Easter, if you celbrate it. If you don't, no judgement. Have a good day anyway.

This chapter was SO MUCH FUN to write, you have no idea. It's Lily and Pan's major turning point from "We mutually hate each other" to "Eh, I guess you're alright." I'm thinking about doing chapter previews, what do you think? I'll test it out now.