"Dr. Sanchez, I thought you said the visions were going to go away?"

The sound of Octavius' voice brings me groggily from my sleep, and I try to refocus my eyes by blinking them furiously.

"Alpha Octavius, I mean no offense, but I did say it would take time." Dr. Sanchez answers cautiously, trying to avoid an alpha-sized outburst.

I can hear Octavius' slight growl, more out of frustration than of anger. Tilting my head up, I watch as he runs both hands through his messed-up hair, his eyes squeezed shut.

"Is there anything you can do?" He pleads, opening his eyes in a squint.

"I'm afraid not. When the attack first ended, we couldn't give her any medication because of her pregnancy, but even now it could be risky, given just how fragile her state is. She's strong, Alpha, but some of that strength is very brittle."

"Just-Just..." Octavius stutters, his anger growing slightly. I hold my breath, praying that he doesn't explode in front of a hospital full of patients and nurses. "I need her to get better. Soon."

Why so soon? What's soon? I think to myself, confusion causing a frown to settle on my face.

"Alpha, please, I am working round the clock to find a solution. But you both endured a traumatic experience, and that takes time and patience."

"Those are two things you know I don't have, Dr. Sanchez." Octavius growls through gritted teeth.

What the hell is he talking about? I perk up my ears, straining to hear the conversation more clearly. A slight tickle crawls to my sinuses, and I struggle to hold back a growing sneeze.

"It's approaching and we need to make sure she's ready for-"

And like the bitches they are, my sinuses decide to react at this very moment.

And it wasn't one of those cute little squirrel sneezes. Oh no. It was a volcano.

"HACHOO!" I sneeze, sitting up with a jolt and a groan. I open my eyes to see a nurse next to me with a box of tissues and both Octavius and the Dr.'s eyes are on me.

Great.

I blow my nose, taking more time than needed, wanting to postpone Octavius' conversation with me. I knew how it would go, all 'are you okay?' and 'you had me so worried." And right now, I'm not in a place to handle that.

But of course, like the dutiful mate he is, Octavius comes bounding over to me, placing a hand on the small of my back and rubbing my skin in small circles.

"You're awake." He mutters, breathily.

"No shit, sherlock." I mumble under my breath. I run a hand through my slightly greasy hair, and I am dying to dive into a bath of soaps and suds.

"Alessandra, are you-"

"I don't know, Octavius." I interrupt, snapping my head up in his direction with an annoyed pout. His eyes are surprised, and he steps back from me, his hand leaving my back.

"I'm sorry, I was just-" He starts, raising his hands up.

"Then don't." I whisper. I know I'm being a juvenile bitch right now, but I'm so sick of waking up in this hospital room, seeing the ugly and grey wall above my head with the unevenly placed speckled pattern. I'm so sick of the itchy tag of the hospital gown scratching against the back of my neck. I'm so sick and fucking tired of this shit happening to me.

"Alessandra-" Octavius tries again.

"Where is my son?" I snap, getting ready to stand up from the bed, only to have Octavius push me back into it.

"Alessandra, Klaude is looking after Xander, you need to rest-"

"No, I need to see my son, I need to take care of him, I need to see my father, I need to get out of this fucking gown, I need to get out!" I shake my head, wrestling with his grip on my chest, but of course, he is so much stronger.

"Alessandra! Calm down, it's okay!" He persists, tired of holding me down and just pulling me into his arms. But I can't melt into him like I want to. I'm done being a little girl who has to run to her mate for protection and reassurance.

I am a goddamn Luna, a mother, a leader.

It's about time that I begin to act like it.

So I stiffen in his hold, causing him to pull away in confusion. I slip out of his hold, and put my hand out against his chest when he tries to pull me in again. I open my mouth to say something, but I just close it again. And I step out into the hallway, Octavius in tow.

"Alessandra, come back." He calls out once I'm at the door of the hospital wing. I turn back to him, and something comes over me.

Maybe it was the pressure of all the eyes in the room on me.

Or maybe it was the tag of the hospital gown digging into my skin.

But I reach back around my head, pulling the string that holds the gown together.

And I let it fall to the floor.

I don't wait for a reaction from the rest of the room, I just turn on my heel, storming out of the office without a thread of clothes on my body.

~~~~

I made it to my wing in record time, knowing that with my little show, Octavius would be hot on my tail. So I took a few back hallways that he never uses, to throw him off.

I turn the knob of the wing, stepping in and forgetting one thing. Klaude.

"Hey, Ale- JESUS WOMAN PUT ON SOME CLOTHING." He shouts, slapping his hands over his eyes in a split second.

I just laugh slightly, stepping past him and into my room, quickly grabbing a robe and settling it over my shoulders.

I exit my room again, and open the door to Xander's quietly.

As soon as I enter the room, he lifts his little head, his fists waving in the air towards me. Seeing my beautiful boy brings the brightest of smiles to my face, and it only grows as I lift him from his crib and into my arms.

"Hey, baby boy." I whisper, tickling his little stomach lightly. He gives me a toothless smile, and I scrunch my nose at him affectionally.

"You ready for a bubble bath?" I whisper, and carry him into my room and through the bathroom door, locking it behind me. I don't want Octavius to interrupt my relaxation.

Moving over to the bathtub, I secure the little baby-chair to the porcelain surface, and place Xander in the already bubbly and warm water. He giggles once the water touches his feet, as I rinse off his little strands of nearly-black hair.

"This little blue bird,

Spinning through the trees,

Sings a song without a word,

It's voice carried with the breeze.

You're my little blue bird,

You're my baby blue

The sweetest laugh I ever heard,

It was a laugh that came from you."

I sing softly to him, his big blue eyes gazing at me intently as I continue to hum while washing him. I made the song the first night I took him back to the wing, when I sat on the rocking chair in his room and watched him sleep soundly in my arms. He was, and still is, so damn perfect. His little nose, his tiny fingers, the dimples in his cheeks that are so much like his father's...

I shake my head, trying to get out of my thoughts. If I get too lost in them I may never find my way out again.

"Okay, Xan, time to go in your bouncy chair." I mumble as I raise him from the bath, drying him off softly and dressing him in a soft onesie that my father had made for him.

I should visit him soon, he's living next to Lacy's family, the retired alpha of Moonrise.

I set Xander down into his bouncy chair next to the bath, and I quickly strip from my robe and slip into the warmth of the bubbles with a sigh.

I close my eyes, leaning my head back against the bath pillow on the edge of the porcelain tub.

"What sound I do, Xan?" I ask rhetorically, turning my head to Xander's giggling face as he bounces softly in the bouncing chair.

"I want to be normal, I don't want to have insane visions. I don't want to go back to that hospital bed. I don't want to be crazy anymore."

"Sometimes I wish I could just be like any other Luna. Boring, hopelessly in love, an amazing mother. But I feel like my life is too full, my love is too hopeful, and I don't spend nearly enough time with you."

Then, my mind raises with an idea. Granted, it is an insane idea, one Octavius would get so mad at me for even thinking about. But an idea that I need.

After quickly washing my hair clean, I step out of the bath, picking Xander up from the chair, and heading into my room. Thankfully, Octavius is nowhere in sight. Probably went somewhere to blow off some steam.

I place Xander on the bed, and quickly go to my closet, pulling out a duffel bag. I shove two days worth of clothes in, as long as a few extra jackets, and then get dressed myself in some dull clothes, as to not draw attention.

With the bag slung over my shoulder, I grab Xander, moving to his room to grab his diaper bag and pack what he would need.

My heart is racing with adrenaline but I can't turn back now. I move to the front door, checking around for Klaude or Octavius. Seeing no one, I sneak through the door, cooing to Xander so he doesn't start crying. I creep through the mansion to the large garage at the front of the house. Opening the door, I scan the long line of luxury cars, and pick a sleek black car at the front of the garage.

Clipping Xander into his car seat, I slide into the driver's seat of the car, putting the keys into the ignition.

This is insane.

Turn back, just go back inside.

Floor it.

And so I do, speeding away from the mansion, holding my breath the entire time.