"RUN BITCH RUN!"

I look up from the paperwork I'm doing, confused as Zaine's shout echoes through the hallways. Glancing at Raiden, who's helping me with my work, I see he looks just as confused as I am. Confused but not really surprised, knowing Zaine.

We finished cleaning up the battlefield after two or so hours and flew back home. I've only been back for a few hours but there's a lot of pack work that needs to be done.

River, Blake, Nick and Drake are here helping too, their mates somewhere around the pack house with the Royals. Any of the basic work that's mostly the same for all our packs is getting done by them, the other alphas. They look slightly more confused at the shout but we all know how Zaine is.

I hear running footsteps of what sound like two people, before Zaine comes running into the meeting room, followed by Killian, both of them looking panicked. They run over and hide behind the long rectangular table, crouching down next to my chair.

"What are you two doing?" I ask, taking in Zaine's different appearance.

He seems to be going for a sort of punk or rebellious look at the moment, a black leather jacket over a white t-shirt, along with black jeans and combat boots. His dark hair is in a sort of spiked style and he has those snake bite piercings in his lower lip, along with a couple silver studs in one ear. He has a few small black star tattoos under the corner of one eye and when he looks at me, mouth open as he pants, I notice he also split his tongue, a split that seems to go quite far back along the muscle.

"Hiding," Killian replies.

"That was obvious," Raiden says, "But from who?"

"Reina and Strange," Zaine says. He pauses, before looking up, "Mother, I can feel that judgmental stare! Anyway, Reina and Strange were acting moody, so we may, or may not, have told them to calm down. And apparently it's 'that time of the month,' so now we have a level 5 code PMS-R&S."

"What?" I ask.

"We made up codes for dealing with them during this week of the month," Killian explains. "PMS-R is Reina, Strange is PMS-S, then there's PMS-R&S for both of them, with levels of severity. 'Cause if you're not careful during Satan's sacrificial waterfall, you might end up being the sacrifice."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," River says. "Girls at this time can be scary."

"That's another reason why I'm glad I'm gay," Nick says.

"Me too!" Killian and Zaine both add.

Zaine looks at Killian, shoving him lightly, "You're bi, you can't say that."

"But I can say I'm glad you don't get periods," Killian replies.

"Technically I could," Zaine says, scooting back to lean against the wall behind me. "If I stayed in a girl form long enough."

"Please don't," Killian says with a grimace. He pauses, listening. His eyes light up, probably enhancing his hearing. A few seconds later, his eyes narrow and he gets up, heading for the door. "Alright, that's enough bullshit. I'm going to bash some skulls in, I'll be back later."

Zaine gets up and runs after him, shouting, "Bashing skulls in is my MO, no stealing!"

They disappear, leaving the rest of us to stare at the door, confused.

"Should we be worried?" River says eventually.

"Maybe," Raiden replies. "Whatever they're doing this time, they'll have a good reason. They don't go on killing sprees for fun. But—"

"ENOUGH!"

Hearing my mom's shout, I get up. Along with the others, I walk quietly towards the sounds of arguing, staying hidden behind a corner, something in me telling me to wait and not interrupt right away. I want to know what's going on and revealing my presence, along with that of my friends', will likely bring the argument to a halt.

"I will not let you talk that way about my son," Mom's voice growls.

"Why not?" jeers another voice, one I recognize as Kieran, a man in his late twenties and one of the pack's stronger warriors. "It's true. He's weak."

My breath catches in my throat. I knew something like this would come up. I am weak and my pack knows it. Someone was going to see me as unfit to be Alpha, someone's bound to end up challenging me. And if I don't accept the challenge, it means I forfeit and the challenger, who would've become the new alpha, would have the right to kill me.

Raiden's hand grasps mine, squeezing reassuringly. I squeeze back, feeling nervousness building within me.

Weak, Thatcher's voice echoes in my head, the words he told me endlessly circling in my mind. Worthless. Broken. Pathetic. No one wants you. No one's coming for you. No one needs you.

Nothing but a burden.

Glad he's gone.

No one needs him.

Weak.

Pathetic.

Useless.

Stop it, Jayden says, pulling me back to reality. Stop thinking of the bullshit he said. It's all lies, Asher. All of it. You're not weak. You're not unwanted. So stop letting that bastard's words get to you.

... Alright, I say softly after a few seconds. I'll try not to let them affect me.

Good, Jayden replies before we both turn our attention back to the conversation around the corner.

"Say that again," Zaine's voice says darkly, in a way that tells me he won't hesitate to attack, "I dare you."

"Changeling," Rei says, her tone giving me an image of her looking warningly at the shape-shifter.

"What?" Zaine replies angrily. "He's spewing crap so I'm going to clean out his mouth... And maybe the rest of his body while I'm at it."

"All I'm doing is telling the truth," Kieran says and I know he's sneering. "He got kidnapped and failed to even try to escape. He seems to be in no shape to give orders or lead the pack. We can't have someone like him as our Alpha."

"Do you even have any idea what happened to him?" Dean growls. "And even if you think Asher's unfit to be Alpha, do you think she's," I'm guessing Dean points to Rei, "Unfit to be Luna?"

There's a pause as Kieran considers Dean's words, likely glancing at Rei. "Well, no, she'd be fine, but—"

Killian cuts him off, "No buts except yours that I'm gonna be kicking so hard you won't be able to sit for weeks. Asher just got back after weeks of torture. Of-fucking-course he's not going to be fine and dandy and in tip-top shape. You won't be at your best either if you keep it up, shithead."

"I agree," River growls, rounding the corner and revealing his presence.

The rest of us follow, stepping out and letting ourselves be seen by the wolves. I see eyes widen, a few guilty or pitying looks and a few scornful glares too.

Kieran sneers at me, "Alpha."

Rei is beside me instantly, her hand grasping mine, her lips pecking my cheek softly, lovingly. I don't look at her, knowing I'll see the angry look in her eyes and while that anger isn't directed at me, my mind always seems to twist it until it is.

I avoid the eyes of the watching pack members too. I don't want to see their scorn or their pity. I don't want to

"You don't deserve to be our leader," Kieran growls, clearly seeing my lack of confidence. "You're weak. Relying on others to save you."

"Asher is a great alpha!" Riley says, stepping forward. I can see he's nervous as everyone looks to him but he doesn't back down. "He's smart, loyal and maybe he's not at his best right now but that doesn't make him weak."

"You're just that because he stopped us from hurting you," Kieran spits. "Kissing his feet won't help."

"Shut the fuck up, Kieran," another warrior, Stacy, says, glaring at the man. "None of us are perfect. And I'd rather have Asher as my alpha than an arrogant dick like you."

"Well too bad," Kieran replies, "Asher Myers, I challenge you for the Alpha title over Moonblood pack."

River growls lowly, fists clenched, but there's nothing he can do. It's an official challenge, one I can't ignore, even if it's unfair. In my mind, Jayden growls angrily and paces with his head low.

I hear a chuckle, one that makes my muscles tense and sends ice running down my spine.

No, he's dead. He can't hurt you.

Thatcher's spirit appears floating close to the ceiling, above my head. He's positioned as if lying on his stomach, one hand under his cheek, propping it up, dressed in the clothes he died in. Part of his face, around one eye that has turned a milky white, is burnt and scarred and it's the same with one hand and arm, likely a result of how he died. I get the feeling that he could get rid of those scars if he wanted to, return his skin to uninjured and smooth but he just doesn't want to, that he likes it the way it is. It's likely that his whole body would be scarred like that but he was able to return his appearance to unscarred and just kept some of the scars for fun.

"Thatcher!" Rei growls angrily, more mad to see him than surprised.

"Now this is interesting," Thatcher says with a childish smile, ignoring Rei's shout. There's a slight echo to his voice, one that adds to his ghostly being. "Cinder is getting blamed for not being strong enough to get away. But tell me, little wolf, would you have been strong enough to escape?"

My eyes narrow. He's taking my side in this? What is he playing at? It has to be another attempt to mess with me, right? He wouldn't take my side, would he? But the wink I see him shoot me makes me begin to think he would.

"What?" Kieran says, angry and confused.

Thatcher laughs lighlty. "Would you have been able to escape? Would any of you have been able to get away? Given just enough food and water that you didn't die. Chained in a dark room, wolfsbane running in your bloodstream, no sunlight, no one to talk to, limited movement, no comfort whatsoever. If the only human interaction you had for weeks was being told lies that would echo in your head on repeat. And with no one else to tell you otherwise, you slowly start to believe those lies.

"You start to believe that maybe you are weak." There's something in Thatcher's tone that makes his voice seem almost hypnotic. Something that lets him worm his way into your head. It's not something gained from being a spirit though, it's something he's had all along and it's unnerving. "You are worthless. Unwanted. Maybe no one is coming for you. Maybe they've abandoned you here because you're nothing. Nothing but a burden..."

My jaw clenches at those words. Nothing but a burden. Glad he's gone. No one needs him. Weak. Pathetic. Useless.

"And once you're down," Thatcher continues, "Once your walls have fallen and you're too weak to try and break free, the physical torture begins. Whips dipped in wolfsbane. Needles piercing you all over. Knives scarring that smooth skin. Burning flames licking at your flesh. It hurts, I know it does."

Thatcher's face ripples and morphs, his smooth skin turning scarred and burnt, hair disappearing. For a second, he lets his real face show, the face that came as a result of being burnt alive. Then the magic mask goes back on and most of his face returns to how it looked before he was set on fire, leaving just that portion of burnt skin around one milky white eye.

"So tell me, little wolf," Thatcher says softly with an eerie smile. "If this was you, would you have been able to escape? Would you have been able to fight your way out or try to outsmart me without any help from anyone? Hmm?" When Kieran says nothing, Thatcher smirks. "I thought so. Everything done to Cinder made sure he was left unable to escape. If those methods weakened an alpha, I have no doubt they would weaken you, darling."

Thatcher's smile drops suddenly, his lips curling back in a sneer. "You know, I never liked people like you. The ones who scorn another for the job that's been done when they themselves aren't sure if they could've done any better. You're a fool for thinking Cinder's weak and for thinking you can win against him."

"What do you know?" Kieran snarls, provoked by Thatcher's words.

Thatcher laughs, his hate suddenly gone as he rolls over in the air so he's upside down and peering down at Kieran with a wide, closed-eye smile. "I know that Daddy didn't raise no pussy. By the way, Cinder, it's a lot of fun to piss off your old man. It's just so easy and amusing."

"Fuck you," Leon growls, appearing in the middle of the room, glaring up at Thatcher, who gives an innocent smile and a little wave.

"Alpha Leon," Kieran says, showing that he still respects him.

"Kieran," Leon replies, sweeping him with a glare. "I can't say I'm happy with you. I didn't raise my son to be a good alpha for nothing. And I didn't strengthen this pack only for an arrogant bitch like you to take over. I'll see you soon, Kieran. I'll get your place ready for your arrival."

With that, Leon disappears.

"This is gonna be good," Thatcher says with a curious smile. That smile quickly turns to a smirk, "Put on a good show. I'll be watching."

He disappears too and I look to Kieran. Wordlessly, we both head towards the door, followed by everyone else who wants to watch the fight.

"You know the rules," I say, voice monotone as we head for a space at the edge of the clearing that the pack house sits in. "No fighting dirty, which means no aiming for the groin, no tail pulling or anything like that. Shifting is allowed and so is putting your wolf in control. Any sort of action from onlookers meant to distract one of us so the other can attack is forbidden. It only ends when one is dead."

Kieran nods once as we get into position, taking fighting stances. The other wolves form a large circle around us, ready to get out of the way if need be.

"Ready!" Raiden says loudly. As the beta, it's his job to be the one who starts the duel and makes sure the fight is fair. "Start!"

Kieran and I circle each other, each waiting for a chance to take the other off guard. He's a great fighter so this won't be easy.

What if I just let him kill me? That wouldn't be so bad, would it? No more nightmares or exhausting work. No more seeing the pitying looks I keep getting or watching people walk on eggshells around me. Just peace or pain depending on where my soul goes. No dealings with the hardships of life.

You can do this, Asher, Rei's voice whispers softly in my mind. I know you can.

I wince slightly at that; I appreciate her words but I don't like how she talks to me as if I'm broken. I don't want to always be reminded of what happened, what was done to me and how I really was broken. I just want to heal.

My eyes glance over to where my family and close friends stand watching me. I don't want to leave them. I could let myself die, yes, but I don't want to put them through that. I don't want to not see Raiden's bright eyes, Scott's teasing smiles or Dean's wide grins. Killian's laughter as Clove yells at him and Zaine snickers in the background. My mate's fiery red eyes and her beautiful personality.

I'm not leaving them.

We're not dying, Jayden says. Let's just get this done and over with

When I agree, he pushes forward a bit, shifting our body into the half human, half wolf form we recently discovered we could become. I see Kieran's eyes widen, along with the eyes of several onlookers.

While he's staring, I lunge, catching Kieran's shoulder with my claws as he spins away at the last second. Hissing in pain, he tries to keep some distance between us as he studies me, looking for a point to attack.

I don't wait, lunging again and making Kieran duck away. It continues like this for a while, me attacking and him dodging. I try feigning an attack, then kick my leg out, catching his feet and tripping him. Kieran recovers quickly but not quick enough.

I lunge, grabbing his head and with a quick twist, snap his neck, his body going limp.

Panting, I get off his body and let my form shift back to fully human.

"Anyone else have any doubts about me as Alpha?" I call out emotionlessly, scanning the crowd around me. "If someone else has a problem, I'd like to sort it out now rather than later."

No one moves. I guess the few other pack members who thought I couldn't lead them changed their minds after watching me fight Kieran.

Looking down at his body, I feel a sense of bitter regret. I really do wish he never challenged me. Kieran was a strong warrior and a normally nice man.

His mate died, Jayden says softly, remembering the death reports we were looking over earlier. In the battle earlier.

Ah, I reply quietly, understanding. So he probably wasn't thinking clearly... And he was bound to die soon...

I crouch down, carefully picking up Kieran's body and starting to walk back to the pack house. He'll be buried with his mate tomorrow.

Rei, Raiden and Mom walk next to me.

"Good job, Asher," Mom says softly. "It can't have been easy."

"It wasn't," I reply. "I've... never killed one of the pack before."

"In a way, you were doing him a favor," Mom says. "He'll be with his mate again."

I nod.

Even with the battle over, it feels like the losses just keep adding up. And it feels like it's all my fault.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and look to see Raiden.

"I know it might not be easy but try not to blame yourself for everything that's going on," he says softly. "Tomorrow's your birthday, Asher, and you deserve to be happy."

I look away from his dark eyes. I completely forgot my birthday is tomorrow. I don't know how well that will go, I don't know if I can manage to stop believing everything that Thatcher's said.

But I guess I can try.