maybe I'd feel better if I just forgot what we had.

after all, we were just friends and you had her to love you now.

you didn't need me or my love anymore, and despite it being so easy for you to find a replacement for me, my ears still rung with the sound of your voice.

like Harley Quinn and the Joker as stupid as it sounded.

there was no place for me, not in your heart or by your side. she replaced the little scraps of my heart that I gave to you with her shiny golden love.

but I still stayed.

staying near you kept hurting me and hurting me and hurting me but I never wanted to move farther away.

maybe I loved the pain, maybe I loved the thrill, maybe I loved the toxicity of it all -

maybe I just loved you.