"I just really wanna be with you."

Silence fell over them. Karl turned around, saw tears running over Sapnaps cheeks.

"I really wanna be with you."

"You're with me now, aren't you? So why can't I just for once talk about other people and the memories I have with them?", Karl asked loudly and Sapnap yelled back: "Because I love you!"

Karl stopped, eyes widened.

Sapnap sobbed. "I love you and it makes me so selfish and I know it's horrible, but I want to be the only one you talk so fondly about, I want to be them, I want to be what you need, because all I ever wanted was you!"

"Sapnap, you know that, only because I talk fondly of others, that doesn't mean I don't talk fondly of you too. Right? I talk about you all the time, I tell everyone about you. For fuck sake even my barista at Starbucks knows your name!", Karl replied, walked up to him and gently wiped his tears, "I just always felt like I didn't need to tell you, how much... how much you mean to me. I thought it was so painfully obvious that you're all I could ever need and that you're the one that I love."

Sapnap started crying harder, head falling against Karls chest, holding onto his shirt.

"I thought you already knew and just ignored the fact that I'm so in love with you that my head won't stop spinning and my heart won't stop racing. I thought you just never wanted to hurt my feelings, but I guess I was wrong."

He hugged the other tightly, kissed his head.

"I'm sorry", Karl whispered and gently gave Sapnaps chin a gentle nudge, so he'd look up, "Is it okay, when I try to kiss the pain away?"

Sapnap nodded, never having ever wanted anything more desperately than Karls lips touching his, making him forget about the aching pain his heart had carried for so long.

"Yes, please", he whispered, leaning in at the same time Karl did, nearly exploding with the emotions that build up within him.

Karls lips were soft, tasted like the monster energy he had during their last stream twenty minutes ago and Sapnap thought this was what heaven must taste like.

Hesitantly he placed his hands on Karls cheeks as if he wanted to make sure he wouldn't ever stop kissing him.

And when Karl tried to pull away, he whispered: "Please don't stop yet"

It ended up with them desperately giving into one another, kissing and touching and feeling everything they could possibly kiss, touch and feel and after they were sure nothing would ever feel better, than being with each other.