"Um... ciao, bella."

"Hol' on... Wow. Google Translate, said you should shove that up your rude ass."

"Tyler."

"How-"

"Who doesn't?"

"And, who would you be?"

"You ruined it. I'm Maxon, Maxon Cooper Hills. I'm sure you would've heard about-"

accidentally

"-my abnormally rich dad's famous company. Shit. I'm... extremely sorry about that."

"From the bottom of my heart."

"I'm a dick, I know."

"How?"

"Anything but that."

"Anything but that."

"Anything but that."

"We're on therapist terms, already?"

"Your friendship. I've said that, like, ten times, already. "

"In that case, we can be more than friends... I'm jokin-"

"This is why you're single."

"You suck at lying, sugar."

"Can I eat you?"

"Huh. Anybody and their fucking dog, can tell you're a certified asshole."