This story contains dark subject matter, and depicts many of the struggles that come from living with a mental illness.

Topics include society's views on mental illness, medication, hospitalization, suicide (not graphic in this story, only mentioned), mentions of sexual assault, harsh language, and general negativity surrounding mental illness. Ivan has a lot of growing to do in this story, and some of his more negative thoughts on himself and his value as a human being are not ideas that I am endorsing. You are loved and needed, and having a mental illness does not make you any less of a beautiful human.

Do not read this story if you feel it may be triggering for you. Please, your mental health and safety are so much more important, and remember that you are valued in this world.

I did significant research while writing this story because I wanted to make it as authentic as possible. This story contains a combination of my own experience dealing with many of the same symptoms, as well as things I have heard when listening to other's stories. If you feel something is not depicted accurately, or depicted in a harmful way, feel free to send me a message and let me know. Keep in mind, mental illness can be very unique to each individual, so your experiences may not be my experiences.

You do not have permission to repost this story or use any of its characters.