"That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way." (Doris Lessing)

"I just don't know how to tell them... you know. To tell them that I'm ready. I really want to do it."

"YOU'RE READY FOR SEX? WOW, REALLY?"

"God damn it, Helmut! Lower your voice already." Fayez hissed, casting a glance in the direction of the crowd of students, who were happily chatting in the cafeteria.

Thankfully, nobody was paying them any attention. Or maybe they were just too used to Helmut's outbursts to even acknowledge them.

Fayez still couldn't believe this childish guy was the Headmaster of the prestigious Institute for Supernatural Beings.

There had to be a side of Helmut's personality that he had yet to discover. A more serious, responsible side.

One day, when he had expressed his bewilderment at the idea that Helmut was ruling the whole Institute, Ashur had given him a very wise answer.

He had told him that for the most part, genius were people who had never lost their inner childs.

Deep, huh?

"I'm sorry, Faye" Helmut replied, without looking sorry in the least. "It's just that - my baby Faye is growing up so fast. It's making me emotional."

"Oh, shut up, you old lizard." Fayez sighed, his cheeks now burning a bit. "How could I have thought it was a good idea to discuss such matters with you? You're just too immature."

"Ah! Me? Immature? Coming from you, that's rich" Helmut pouted, before grabbing his friend's arm as the latter was making a move to get up. "Wait. Don't go. Thanks for telling me - although I am a bit disappointed that you told Nassiba first."

Fayez sat down heavily, feeling a bit desperate. He had been thinking of a way to tell his mates that he was ready to "do the deed" for weeks. One day, he had even made a not-so-subtile allusion about it to Zephyr.

Contrarily to what one might think, Zephyr hadn't jump his bones on the spot, like Fayez had hoped.

He had responded something along the line of "Sorry, squirrel, but you're still recovering", before giving him a sweet kiss on the lips to soothe Fayez's obvious disappointment.

"Why the long face, Faye?" Helmut suddenly asked, with a more serious voice. "Tell me, you really want to have sex with them, do you?"

"I- I do." Fayez replied, a bit dumbfounded by the question.

"You don't feel like you have to, because they're your mates, right?"

"I know I don't have to. I just want to do it." Fayez whispered the last part with conviction.

"Good. Now, tell me, why do you want to do it?"

Once again, Fayez checked that nobody was listening, before thinking of an answer. What was it with Helmut and his weird questions, today? That was getting plainly embarrassing.

"If you can't even talk about it, maybe you're not ready" Helmut observed. "Communication is key, you know."

"It's not with you that I want to have sex, though." Fayez retorted with a raised eyebrow.

"A shame, really" Helmut replied, with a feigned hurt expression.

Fayez's eyes widened for a split of second, before he started laughing whole-heartedly. Soon, Helmut started joining them and the two friends laughed for so long, they eventually forgot why they started laughing in the first place.

"I want to have sex with them because I think it would bring us even closer" Fayez tried to explain, when they eventually calmed down. "I know you can be in a romantic relationship without having sex, but I just feel the drive to do it with them. I want to make them feel pleasure and I - I want to know what pleasure feels, too. I want to find out about sexual pleasure with them."

"That's beautiful" Helmut commented in a suddenly pensive voice, that made Fayez looked at him curiously.

Before he had time to analyse Helmut's sudden change of mood, the mischievious Headmaster added: "Plus, the three of them are extremely hot, so I understand it's hard for you to keep it in your pants."

"Shut up. Don't talk about my mates like this" Fayez protested, giving his friend a light slap on the top of his head for good measure.

"Okay, I'll shut up. But, Faye, I just want to tell you this: don't worry about it. You want to have sex with them, and from the way they're looking at you these days, it's obvious they're no saints either. Everything comes in due time. You'll have sex with them at some point, and it will be amazing."

"I know that" Fayez mumbled. "It's just that -"

"You want to have penetrative sex and you're afraid of the pain?" Helmut guessed.

"NO! Plus, what tells you I'll be on the receiving hand?" Fayez protested. "No, it's just that they have so much experience and most of the time I feel like I have no clue of what I should be doing. I'm just afraid that they will be disappointed in me."

"We won't"

Fayez jumped in surprised and turned around to find Akhenaton standing just behind him with a smug expression. However, his smug expression turned soft and caring as he leaned down to give his boyfriend a peck on his cheek.

"We'll talk about it later, but Helmut's right, brat." he whispered in his ear, as he brought the slightly smaller man closer to him. "You have nothing to worry about. Experience doesn't mean much. Every little moment of intimacy with you already feels amazing, so I know sex is going to be the amazing, too. I'm happy to know that you trust us enough to want to do it with us."

Fayez felt like he couldn't verbally respond to the hearwarming declaration, so he just nodded, leaning back against his mate while trying his best to not make eye-contact with Helmut.

"You said you wanted to talk about something important, Helmut?" Akhenaton asked aloud.

"Yes" Helmut replied, all trace of his previous amusement gone. "Actually, it's about you, Fayez."

Fayez could feel Akhenaton tense up against him, although the prefect was maintaining a neutral expression. Hoping that it would somehow alleviate the brunette's tension a bit, he took his hand in his.

His eyes met with a paire of warm, brown ones. Akhenaton gave him one of his rare and exquisite little smile, before closing his arms around Fayez's midsection in a protective manner.

"What do you think, Faye?" Akhenaton asked him directly. "Do you want us to be there for this conversation, or not? It's entirely up to you."

Fayez didn't even have to think twice about it. Whatever it was, his mates's absence would only make it worse.

"I want the three of you to be there."

Akhenaton nodded, then looked at Helmut, as his hands started rubbing soothing circles on Fayez's stomach, as if they weren't standing in the middle of the cafeteria.

Fayez didn't care much about what others might think, though. Not when he got to enjoy his mate's touch.

"Where shall we have this conversation?" he asked Helmut.

"The forest?" the other man suggested. "This way we would be sure none is going to disturb us."

"What about the Spirit of the Wood?" Akhenaton then asked, in a slightly skeptical voice.

"She always remains in the deepest parts of the forests. We won't venture too far into the woods."

"Okay, then" Akhenaton agreed. "I'll mind-link Ash and Zeph, so that they can meet us directly at the edge of the forest."

Helmut nodded, and started walking toward the cafeteria's exit door. As Akhenaton's made a move to let go of his mate, Fayez stopped him.

"Wait" he whispered, his eyes down.

"What is it?"

Fayez didn't replied anything this time, gripping Akhenaton's arms a little tighter and hoping that his mate would get the unspoken message.

Thankfully, the sorcerer was getting better and better at reading him.

"Oh, baby brat" Akhenato whispered in a fond voice, before hugging his man even tighter, engulfing the vampire completely into his embrace.

Fayez felt embarassment and relief fighting inside himself, before relief quickly overpowered the initial embarrassment he had felt for acting so needy.

"That's okay" Akhenaton murmured, as if he could tell what was going on inside Fayez's mind. "Never feel ashamed for needing a hug. Zeph, Ashur and I will always gladly give you one."

"I know that now" Fayez admitted, as tension gradually left his body.

That was it. That's what he needed to face whatever news Helmut was going to bring to him. A simple hug from one of his mate.

There was something about Akhenaton's embrace, too. Fayez always felt safe in his big and sturdy arms. Even at the very beginning, when he didn't know the icy and annoying prefect was his mate, he had found himself enjoying the other man's warmth and proximity.

"We can go, now" Fayez eventually said.

Akhenaton reluctantly took a step away from him, but Fayez didn't let go of his hand, bringing another small smile to the prefect's lips.

"Let's do this."

They walked in silence, until they reached the edge of the forest. Fayez had to fight the urge to run toward his mates as he saw Zephyr and Ashur standing next to Helmut.

"Ake. Faye" Ashur greeted them politely, for the man was always much more formal in public.

Zephyr, on the other hand, didn't give two shits about the etiquette, and he all but jump into Akhenaton's arms, before ruffling Fayez's hair - an action that required him to stand on tiptoes.

"I won't beat around the bush" Helmut declared in a grave tone. "It's about your hands, Fayez."

"My hands? What about them?" Fayez asked, feeling confused. "I don't see how the situation with my hands can get any worse than it already is."

"Actually, I am going to deliver you a good news, but I wanted to make sure... Remove your gloves, please."

There was something about Helmut's voice that urged Fayez to obey him. In times like these, his friend looked less like a petulant young man, and more like the responsible leader he surely was.

"Fayez" Helmut said in a quiet voice. "Almost two months ago, you used your hands to save Zephyr. I believed that this day you spent all of the 'negative energy' in your hands and that, in consequence, what has been done a long time ago came undone."

"Speak clearly, please" Fayez snapped, although he had an idea what Helmut meant.

"The curse is gone. I think you can touch other people, now. Not just your mates."

There was a heavy silent. Fayez took a few steps back, distanciating himself from his mates.

"No" he whispered.

"Try touching me." Helmut urged him, but this time, Fayez fought the command.

"I'm not taking the risk to hurt you" Fayez retorted, before putting his hand on his own stomach.

He saw his mates grimace at the implication, but he didn't think too much of it. His hands were now resting on his own body. The feeling was strange, but not painful.

"No" he whispered again, in a voice so low that he barely heard it himself.

"Fayez" Helmut tried, but Fayez didn't pay him any attention.

He carefully put the tip of his finger on the petal of a daisy. Nothing happened. The flower didn't die, its roots didn't wither.

It was too much, and too little at once. He wanted for the resilient trees around him to suffocate him. He wanted to dive deep into the water, and let the water submerge him entirely. He wanted to merge with the Nature, as crazy as it may sound.

He stood up so quickly he felt dizzy for a few seconds, and then he ran. He didn't even stop when he heard his mates calling his name.

He ran, without knowing where he was going.

At some point, he stopped running, and let himself fall on the ground, touching everything he could with his hands, tears rolling down his cheeks.

The feeling was foreign, and way too strong for him to endure.

Suddenly, there was a hand on his shoulder.

Ashur.

"Faye? What's wrong? Your hands - it's a good news, right?" an hesitant voice asked.

Zephyr.

A blue halo envelopped him, protecting him from unknown dangers.

Akhenaton.

"It's a good news, Zeph" he eventually whispered, his voice broken from having cried so much. "It's just - I think I'm only realizing now to what extent I've been missing out. My whole existence... I never knew how it could feel to be able to touch living things so carelessly, without destroying them. And now - I can also touch the others. I won't - I won't need to wear these fucking gloves ever again."

He broke down again, and felt a soft pressure against his back, as he was pressed against Ashur's large body. He hidded his face in the other man's chest, and let go of emotions he wouldn't have been able to name, even if he had wanted to.

"We have to go" Akhenaton declared, as Fayez eventually calmed down. "We've ventured too far into the woods. It's best if our path doesn't meet with the Spirit Of the Woods."

Fayez nodded, and tiredly tried to stand up, his energy drained from him.

He let out a surprised yell when Ashur caught him and lifted him up easily, as if Fayez wasn't a big and quite heavy vampire.

I will tell him another time not to carry me like this, he thought, as his head rolled against the prefect's shoulder, who had started taking a light jog along with his other two mates. I'm just too tired now.

He closed his eyes, his hands still clutching the gloves he didn't dare throwing away just yet, as he couldn't shake off the fear that it was just a dream, and that everything would be back to normal tomorrow.

Never, in his wildest dreams, had he imagined that the day would come when he no longer needed his gloves.