'Bring your love, baby, I could bring my shame

Bring the drugs, baby, I could bring my pain

Oh, I got my heart right here

Oh, I got my scars right here'

○

"Cardi you can't lock yourself in this room for the rest of the trip babes" E says through the thick bedroom door.

Ever since that picture was sent to my phone my whole world crumbled along with the rest of my heart.

I hadn't ate in days let alone leave out this room, my phone had been dead since that night and I had no intentions on plugging it in to charge.

I cried, a lot. I felt like a crybaby but I couldn't hold in my emotions like I normally would.

This shit hurt. It wasn't new but the feeling was different, the pain was different when she was my inflicter.

It wasn't even the picture that had me feeling like this though, it was the betrayal.

All I could do was blame myself, I never should've put my trust in her. Truthfully I never should've even fell in love with her but she hit me harder than crack in the 80's.

I resented her.

Resented her because I gave her so many fucking chances to leave me alone, to let me be.

She just had to be persistent right? She just had to be addictive?

I resented her so fucking much cause I wanted to be left alone and she just couldn't give me the piece of mind of staying the fuck out of my life.

Now look at me, I should've seen this coming though.

She was too good to be true, a fantasy almost.

"Cardi open this fucking door!" Henny shouts pushing against the door.

"Bitch leave me alone!" I shout rolling my eyes, I couldn't even be miserable in peace.

"No bitch I'm hosting at the club tonight and you coming, if you not out here in the next twenty minutes I'm telling ma that you was the one that broke her favorite vase" I perk up in bed, a shiver of fear running down my spine.

"Bitch you wouldn't"

"Try me hoe" She retorts confidently.

This opp ass hoe really would.

"I can't stand ya ass" I mumble flipping the comforter off my body.

"You need to slow down, wassup with you?" Star asks as I down my 5th shot tonight.

Setting the shot glass down I unlock my phone going to the message clicking on the picture before shoving my phone in her face.

"Oh shit" She blurts as her eyes widen in shock.

"Can you believe this bitch? After everything I did for her, I was going out my way just to keep a smile on her face and this how she repay me?" I shake my head pouring another shot in my glass.

"Have you called her?"

"Call her for what? So she can fill my ear up with lies and excuses? Fuck outta here" I bitterly chuckle picking the small glass up tossing back the strong warm liquid.

"So what you gone do?"

"What you mean what I'm gone do? It's ova with, that's a dub my nigga"

"You deadass?" She laughs looking at me like I was joking.

"Word to my granny, now y'all dragged me out the house, so you gone get litty with me or what?" I ask and she looks at me worriedly.

"You sure you good though?"

"I'm good star" I reassure her and she hesitantly nods.

"Aight, let's get litty then" She smirks snatching the bottle out my hand as my lips curve up into a smile.

All I wanted to do was get drunk and forget, just for the moment.

Leaving her on read I exit out our thread opening up ig searching Bianca's IG handle.

Clicking on her page I then click on the story bubble opening up her instasnap.

The first video confirmed that I did in fact see what I thought I saw and my eyes weren't deceiving me.

I had something for her when she got back home though.

She cut off all contact with me for 4 days and counting and now this.

Her fucking with my feelings like this just shows that she doesn't really give a fuck about me.

I would address everything with her when she got back in the city though.

Taking a small sip from my cup I lick over my bottom lip looking over at the couple that was eyeing me.

I was just previously dancing with the girl on stage and I knew she was probably feeling a little hot afterwards.

"Cardi ya shorty seen my instasnap before I could delete it" Bianca tells me in my ear and I shrug taking another sip from my cup.

"She ain't gone ever see me again, I'm done with ha"

"Stop the kap" She laughs and I roll my eyes in irritation, why was that shit so hard to believe?

"I'm deadass, we done. When we get back to the city the last time she will ever see me is when I'm walking out her door with all my shit!" I disgruntfully spit.

"Damn bitch, she finally pulled a you on you or somethin?" Turning my head I mug her.

"What I do?" She asks from behind me as I walk away from her side.

Ignoring her I walk over to the couple.

"Why yah keep staring at me" I confidently smirk.

"You're a beautiful girl" The fine chocolate specimen with waves speaks with a sly smirk.

"So yah in a open relationship or something?" I question curiously.

"Only for tonight" The gorgeous brownskin girl smirks sipping from her cup.

"Y'all ever fucked on ecstasy?" I was expecting them to look shocked at my bluntness but they didn't seem to mind at all.

"No, but we're open to experiencing new things"

"I'm staying at a spot on the beach, if y'all really bout it we can leave right now and get it poppin" I raise a single arched eyebrow complimented with a mischievous smirk.

"Lead the way beautiful"